Koechner Quotes & Sayings

I will smash your face into a car windshield, and then take your mother, Dorothy Mantooth, out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again. — David Koechner

Didn't George Washington say, 'He who controls Afghanistan will carry New Jersey?' — Gore Vidal

I am all about switching between genres and doing as much as possible. — David Koechner

The dream that I've been having, about my high-school sweetheart, is not really about my high-school sweetheart, when you get right down to it. It's not a dream about Alison Koechner and our lost love and the precious little three-bedroom house in Maine we might have built together, had things gone a different way. I am not dreaming of white picket fences and Sunday crosswords and warm tea.
There's no asteroid in the dream. In the dream, life continues. Simple life, happy and white-picket lined or otherwise. Mere life. Goes on.
When I'm dreaming of Alison Koechner, what I'm dreaming of is not dying. — Ben H. Winters

Startled pigeons filled the old, shadowy rooms and crumbling hallways with their soft thunder. — Stephen King

I love bouncing between different genres. And comedy, obviously, is something I enjoy doing the most and I've had the most success with. But I'm open to all jobs and all genres. — David Koechner

Everyone starts strong. Success comes to those with unwavering commitment to be at the end. — Howard Schultz

I think I'm very fortunate to be born in America. And lucky to be able to have lived and had the opportunity to do what I want to do. — Ralph Lauren

I never sweat about work. I just assume work's coming. — David Koechner

I love weird man, when you get to do something that you don't necessarily get to do in real life, play characters that are a little bit outlandish. — David Koechner

I like to say, in Hollywood, you can't make a redneck movie without me. That doesn't happen. You better not do it. — David Koechner

I think that even in a drama, we all want to smile, and laugh because what a horrible life if we're just like "I'm in a drama." And so I think in everything you're trying to look for the humor, even if it's a dark scene, because most people want to have fun in life, as opposed to have a boring time, a terrible time. — David Koechner

I can't die until the government finds a safe place to bury my liver — Phil Harris

I think I went into poli-sci because I knew there was a stage, plus I thought I wanted to help people, and I realized in poli-sci that if you want to be a politician you're either born into it, or you've got an amazing brain, which those are rare - and I don't have one. — David Koechner

When I'm dreaming of Alison Koechner, what I'm dreaming of is not dying. Okay? See? I get it. — Ben H. Winters

Nothing trumps honesty, as far as I'm concerned. — David Koechner

But I love singing live. Nothing beats the feeling of going out on stage and going, 'I can really sing.' — Jessie J.

You are always looking for a different kind of read and a different kind of intention when you are by yourself in the booth. Occasionally you are playing off of people, but it is a bit of a different muscle that you have to flex. At the end of the day though, it really is all just great fun and play that we are lucky enough to get paid for. — David Koechner

I don't like people who don't have opinions. — David Koechner

It's dangerous for one actor to advise another one, especially when you're not in charge. On the set, I'm never gonna tell another person, "Here's what I think you should do." That's a discussion they should only have with the writers, producers, and directors. — David Koechner

Every character and person in life needs a voice and every once in a while I get to inhabit the voice of the misunderstood. — David Koechner