Kharms Quotes & Sayings

I was most happy when pen and paper were taken from me and I was forbidden from doing anything. I had no anxiety about doing nothing by my own fault, my conscience was clear, and I was happy. This was when I was in prison. — Daniil Kharms

I adore not being me. I'm not very good at being me. That's why I adore acting so much. — Deborah Kerr

I am interested only in "nonsense"; only in that which makes no practical sense. I am interested in life only in its absurd manifestations. — Daniil Kharms

There lived a redheaded man who had no eyes or ears. He didn't have hair either, so he was called a redhead arbitrarily. He couldn't talk because he had no mouth. He had no nose either. He didn't even have arms or legs. He had no stomach, he had no back, he had no spine, and he had no innards at all. He didn't have anything. So we don't even know who we're talking about. It's better that we don't talk about him any more. — Daniil Kharms

Chess can help a child develop logical thinking, decision making, reasoning, and pattern recognition skills, which in turn can help math and verbal skills. — Susan Polgar

Pushkin loved to throw rocks. As soon as he saw a rock, he would throw it. Sometimes he became so excited that he stood, all red in the face, waving his arms, throwing rocks, simply something awful.
Pushkin had four sons, all idiots. One didn't even know how to sit in a chair and fell off all the time. Pushkin himself also sat on a chair rather badly. It was simply killing: they sat at the table; at one end, Pushkin kept falling off his chair continually, and at the other end, his son. Simply enough to make one split one's sides with laughter. — Daniil Kharms

Authors I've longed to write like - but realize I actually can't even begin to - include Poe, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Kafka, Daniil Kharms, Witold Gombrowicz, Emily Dickinson, Robert Walser, Barbara Comyns, Ntozake Shange, Camille Laurens, Zbigniew Herbert, and Jose Saramago. — Helen Oyeyemi

You're right. The fact that the entire party of fifty guests caught you and Jill Moench kissing in the closet was a complete misunderstanding." Theo snorted, turning to Penny, "His girlfriend certainly got a surprise at her party. And it wasn't the kind where everyone jumps out from behind the couch to yell, 'Surprise! — Katlyn Charlesworth

It's hard to say something about Pushkin to a person who doesn't know anything about him. Pushkin is a great poet. Napoleon is not as great as Pushkin. Bismarck compared to Pushkin is a nobody. And the Alexanders, First, Second and Third, are just little kids compared to Pushkin. In fact, compared to Pushkin, all people are little kids, except Gogol. Compared to him, Pushkin is a little kid.
And so, instead of writing about Pushkin, I would rather write about Gogol.
Although, Gogol is so great that not a thing can be written about him, so I'll write about Pushkin after all.
Yet, after Gogol, it's a shame to have to write about Pushkin. But you can't write anything about Gogol. So I'd rather not write anything about anyone. — Daniil Kharms

Eleven times Jesus died on the cross, Eleven times falls down a body thrown upward, Eleven times also I abandon the logical flow of thought. — Daniil Kharms

One short man said: "I would give anything if only I were even a tiny bit taller."
He barely said it when he saw a lady magician standing in front of him.
"What do you want?" says the magician.
But the short man just stands there so frightened he can't even speak.
"Well?" says the magician.
The short man just stands there and says nothing. The magician vanishes.
Then the short man started crying and biting his nails. First he chewed off all the nails on his fingers, and then on his toes.

Reader! Think this fable over and it will make you somewhat uncomfortable. — Daniil Kharms

Courage, love, faith ... these are
all muscles that grow in strength each time we push them to their limits. — Jeremy Courtney

May radiance of your light brighten every dark encounter. — Lailah Gifty Akita

stood at the door zipping, buttoning, fastening; it's what people in Wyoming do before they go outside in late December. — Craig Johnson

Is there anything on earth which would have meaning
and would even change the course of events not only on
earth, but in other worlds?" I asked my teacher.
"There is," my teacher answered me.
"Well, what is it?" I asked.
"It's ... " began my teacher and suddenly fell silent.
I stood and waited intently for his answer. But he was
silent.
And I stood and was silent.
And he was silent.
And I stood, silent.
And he was silent.
We're both standing and silent.
Ho-la-la!
We're both standing and silent.
Ho-le-le!
Yes, yes, we're both standing and silent!
16-17 July 1937 — Daniil Kharms

For those of you unfamiliar with the term "growth hacking," growth hacking focuses exclusively on strategies and tactics (typically in digital marketing) that help grow a business or product. The concept was first coined by Sean Ellis of Dropbox fame back in 2010 in a blog post. It has since changed the face of startup marketing, with Techcrunch guest writer Aaron Ginn explaining that a growth hacker has a "mindset of data, creativity, and curiosity. — Monica Leonelle

When a person is only half an ass like me, and not a complete one, she senses certain things. — Michael Ende

I think I am the most impressed with writing styles that defy category, like Kharms or Selby, Breton or Jarry, where you become as interested in the writer as much as the writing itself. It's all these things that make reading so appealing to me. — Henry Rollins

Good company will always be found much less expensive than bad. — George Washington

Science is the search for truth, that is the effort to understand the world: it involves the rejection of bias, of dogma, of revelation, but not the rejection of morality. — Linus Pauling

One must write poetry in such as way that if one threw the poem in a window, the pane would break. — Daniil Kharms

In that world I knew that good was killing me, but I thought it was evil. — Antonio Porchia

Open this notebook every day and write down half a page at the very least. If you have nothing to write down, then at least, following Gogol's advice, write down that today there's nothing to write. Always write with attention and look on writing as a holiday. — Daniil Kharms