J O O M Quotes & Sayings

I'm fascinated by political enthusiasm. — P. J. O'Rourke

I'm not afraid of O.J. now. — Kato Kaelin

...this money goes to a war machine, a war machine that attacks its own citizens and those of other countries to force them into submission. They spend billions, even trillions of dollars on foreign aid while our own citizens cannot dig out of poverty. — J.C. Allen

Never saw a point in showing up for jury duty. I already know I'm going to vote guilty." Ari's mouth made a tiny O, and she put her hand to her heart. "What about justice?"
"It is justice. Whoever they are, they're guilty of making me show up for jury duty. — J.C. Nelson

I'm absolutely, 100 percent, not guilty. — O.J. Simpson

And as she was crossing to the day-nursery he added thoughtlessly, 'And shut that window. I feel a draught.'
'O George, never ask me to do that. The window must always be left open for them, always, always. — J.M. Barrie

There's a current notion that you should "take charge of your disease." No thanks. I'm busy. I've got cancer. I'm willing to face having cancer. I'm not willing to face having cancer with homework. I promised Dr. Pipas and Dr. Zaki that I wouldn't show up with sheaves of printouts from the Internet containing everything on Wikipedia on malignancies. They each laughed with detectable notes of relief. Although I suspect my wife has made her way into the health blog ether. Fish oil pills, raw kelp, and other untoward substances started showing up on dinner plates after I was diagnosed. — P. J. O'Rourke

O. J. Simpson theory of legal fees: I'm not paying you; you're lucky to be here; go make a buck with your book. — John Grisham

This computer-generated pangram contains six a's, one b, three c's, three d's, thirty-seven e's, six f's, three g's, nine h's, twelve i's, one j, one k, two l's, three m's, twenty-two n's, thirteen o's, three p's, one q, fourteen r's, twenty-nine s's, twenty-four t's, five u's, six v's, seven w's, four x's, five y's, and one z. — Douglas R. Hofstadter

11For h the grace of God i has appeared, bringing salvation j for all people, 12training us to renounce ungodliness and k worldly passions, and l to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in m the present age, 13 n waiting for our blessed o hope, the p appearing of the glory of our great q God and Savior Jesus Christ, 14 r who gave himself for us to s redeem us from all lawlessness and t to purify for himself t a people for his own possession who are u zealous for good works. — Anonymous

5 I j wait for the LORD, k my soul waits, and l in his word I hope; 6 my soul m waits for the Lord more than n watchmen for o the morning, more than watchmen for the morning. — Anonymous

The United States of America was once a great nation... but this United States is not the one our founding fathers set out to build over 200 years ago. This United States stands for everything its citizens have fought against throughout its history: oppression, unwarranted violence against innocent and weaker countries or its own citizens, trampling of human rights, crooked legal systems, and socialism. — J.C. Allen

G Our Father in heaven, h hallowed be i your name. [1] 10 j Your kingdom come, k your will be done, [2] l on earth as it is in heaven. 11 m Give us n this day our daily bread, [3] 12 and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. 13 And o lead us not into temptation, — Anonymous

Bearing Two Nine Five distance six miles from ----- -----. Attack! Attack!" On the bridge of the Grayson we shook off an overpowering weariness and listened to the PT's as they tore in for the enemy to lash out with torpedoes ("pickles," in PT language). "----- ----- they're headed for you. Cut'em off - cut'em off." "They're headed for the ----- -----. Get in there! What the hell's the matter? " "O.K. - O.K. I've fired my pickles - we got him - I'm getting out of here." "All ----- Close in - Close in." Toward Savo there was a red glow - a sudden blinding flash of flame. ----- had caught a pickle. That was swell. The PT's were in there with everything they had. But their pickles were limited in number. Now the destroyers could go after the enemy with our own tin fish and comparatively heavy guns. Scotty Etheridge — Frederick J. Bell

I'm too tough and sensitive to have to have some pubescent twerp with his mom's earring in his tongue, who combs his hair with Redi-Whip and has an Ani DiFranco tattoo on his shin, come show me how a computer works. — P. J. O'Rourke

She was battered incessantly, regularly, all the time. I'm not saying 24 hours a day, but the incidents of battering were extraordinarily high. — Susan Forward

21. g And Jesus went away from there and withdrew to the district of Tyre and Sidon. 22And behold, h a Canaanite woman from that region came out and was crying, i "Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David; my daughter is severely oppressed by a demon." 23But he did not answer her a word. And his disciples came and begged him, saying, j "Send her away, for she is crying out after us." 24He answered, k "I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel." 25But she came and l knelt before him, saying, "Lord, help me." 26And he answered, "It is not right to take the children's bread and m throw it to the dogs." 27She said, "Yes, Lord, yet even the dogs eat n the crumbs that fall from their masters' table." 28Then Jesus answered her, "O woman, o great is your faith! p Be it done for you as you desire." q And her daughter was p healed instantly. [5] — Anonymous

There's a joke people tell in the Soviet Union: Mitterrand, Bush and Gorbachev have a meeting with God. Mitterrand says, 'My country faces many difficult problems-- lagging exports, Muslim minorities, European unification. How long will it be before France's problems are solved?' God says, 'Fifteen years.' Mitterrand begins to cry. 'I'm an old man,' says Mitterrand. 'I'll be dead by then. I'll never see France's problems solved.' Then Bush says, 'My country faces many difficult problems-- recession, crime, racial prejudice. How long will it be before America's problems are solved?' God says, 'Ten years.' Bush begins to cry. 'I'm an old man,' says Bush. 'I'll be out of office by then. I won't get any credit for solving America's problems.' Then Gorbachev says, 'My country faces many, many difficult problems. How long will it be before the Soviet Union's problems are solved?' God begins to cry. — P. J. O'Rourke

Softly sang as I drifted into dreams: F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y and Z A, — Ian Hutton

We need to contact NSA, CIA, anybody using initials... and the President! — J.C. Allen

I'm old enough to remember when the air over American cities was a lot dirtier than it is now. — P. J. O'Rourke

I'm a member of the working press; you'd think I'd know better than to listen to journalists. — P. J. O'Rourke

I'm not a tech-savvy parent. I communicate with my children via the old-media format called yelling. — P. J. O'Rourke

O to the M to the G! — H.J. Bellus

I'm here as a radio journalist but am not even sure which part of a tape recorder takes the pictures. — P. J. O'Rourke

It's why we oppose Citizens United from that right-wing Supreme Court. In 2012, I also said the Tea Party "acted like terrorists" and called a donut shop manager in Milwaukee who wanted lower taxes a "smartass." And I said the number one issue is a three-letter word, J-O-B-S." I'm proud of who I am. — Joe Biden

God Is Love 7Beloved, j let us love one another, for love is from God, and k whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 l Anyone who does not love does not know God, because m God is love. 9In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that n God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. 10In this is love, o not that we have loved God n but that he loved us and sent his Son to be p the propitiation for our sins. 11Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 q No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and r his love is perfected in us. — Anonymous

I'm sorry that the family I was g i v e n has created so much chaos in the family I've c h o s e n. — J-Ax

J while we were still weak, at the right time k Christ died for the ungodly. 7. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person - though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die - 8but l God shows his love for us in that m while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. 9. Since, therefore, n we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from o the wrath of God. 10. For if p while we were enemies q we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by r his life. 11. More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received s reconciliation. — Anonymous

Some people are worried about the difference between right and wrong. I'm worried about the difference between wrong and fun. — P. J. O'Rourke

The terrible state of public education has paid huge dividends in ignorance. Huge. We now have a country that can be told blatant lies
easily checkable, blatant lies
and I'm not talking about the covert workings of the CIA. When we have a terrorist attack, on September 11, 2001 with 19 men
15 of them are Saudis
and five minutes later the whole country thinks they're from Iraq
how can you have faith in the public? This is an easily checkable fact. The whole country is like the O. J. Simpson jurors. — Fran Lebowitz

I'm uncommon fond of reading, too."

"Are you, Joe?"

"On-common. Give me," said Joe, "a good book, or a good newspaper, and sit me down afore a good fire, and I ask no better. Lord!" he continued, after rubbing his knees a little, "when you do come to a J and a O, and says you, 'Here, at last, is a J-O, Joe,' how interesting reading is!"

I derived from this, that Joe's education, like Steam, was yet in its infancy. — Charles Dickens

Yo ho, yo ho, the pirate life, The flag o' skull and bones, A merry hour, a hempen rope, And hey for Davy Jones.' At — J.M. Barrie

How d'you spell 'belligerent'?" said Ron, shaking his quill very hard while staring at his parchment. "It can't be B - U - M - "
"No, it isn't," said Hermione. "And 'augury' doesn't begin O - R - G either. — J.K. Rowling

Oddly, she felt safe ... as if the patient would protect her because of the vow he'd given her, and Red Sox would do the same because of his bond with the patient.
Where the hell was the logic in that, she wondered. Gimme an S! A T! An O! A C! Followed by a K-H-O-L-M! What's it spell? HEAD FUCK.
The patient leaned down to her ear. I can't see you as the cheerleader type. But you're right, we both would slaughter anything that so much as startled you. — J.R. Ward

HORKLUMP M.O.M. Classification: X The Horklump comes from Scandinavia but is now widespread throughout northern Europe. It resembles a fleshy, pinkish mushroom covered in sparse, wiry black bristles. A prodigious breeder, the Horklump will cover an average garden in a matter of days. It spreads sinewy tentacles rather than roots into the ground to search for its preferred food of earthworms. The Horklump is a favourite delicacy of gnomes but otherwise has no discernible use. H — J.K. Rowling

I can't come,' she said apologetically, 'I have forgotten how to fly.'
'I'll soon teach you again.'
'O Peter, don't waste the fairy dust on me. — J.M. Barrie

I'm a registered Republican and consider socialism a violation of the American principle that you shouldn't stick your nose in other people's business except to make a buck. — P. J. O'Rourke

O.M.G. Lucca, what are you feeding her? Everyday I look at you, and I swear those twinnes must double in size. Look at your bump in this dress, how are you managing to cart that around? Rather you than me chubby." ~Hazel — S.J. Molloy

I'm really tired of virtue. — P. J. O'Rourke

For there is no truth in their mouth; their inmost self is j destruction; k their throat is l an open grave; they m flatter with their tongue. 10 n Make them bear their guilt, O God; let them o fall by their own counsels; because of the abundance of their transgressions cast them out, for they have rebelled against you. — Anonymous

Margaret Atwood, J.G. Ballard, Ray Bradbury, Jim Crace, Arthur C. Clarke, Russell Hoban, Anna Kavan, Doris Lessing, Cormac McCarthy, Walter M. Miller, Tim O'Brien, Will Self and Marcel Theroux, — Bill Bryson

It's the squares who know how to fly the fighter planes and operate the missiles and the bombs and work the M-16s. Liberals would still be fumbling with the federally mandated trigger locks. — P. J. O'Rourke

I'm a member of the 1960s generation. We didn't have any wisdom. — P. J. O'Rourke

At least I'm not asking you to go to six o'clock Mass with me in the morning."
"Darling Eve, to get me to do that the amount and variety of the sexual favors required are so many and myriad even my imagination boggles."
"I don't think you can exchange sexual favors for Mass attendance. But if I decide to go check it out, and I get the chance, I'll ask the priest. — J.D. Robb

91 He who dwells in a the shelter of the Most High will abide in b the shadow of the Almighty. 2 I will say [1] to the LORD, "My c refuge and my d fortress, my God, in whom I e trust." 3 For he will deliver you from f the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence. 4 He will g cover you with his pinions, and under his h wings you will i find refuge; his j faithfulness is k a shield and buckler. 5 l You will not fear m the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, 6 nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor the destruction that wastes at noonday. 7 A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. 8 You will only look with your eyes and n see the recompense of the wicked. 9 Because you have made the LORD your o dwelling place - the Most High, who is my c refuge — Anonymous

PSALM 18 I love you, O LORD, my strength. 2 The LORD is my i rock and my j fortress and my deliverer, my God, my i rock, in k whom I take refuge, my l shield, and m the horn of my salvation, my n stronghold. 3 I call upon the LORD, who is o worthy to be praised, and I am saved from my enemies. — Anonymous

7Nevertheless, I tell you the truth: it is to your advantage that I go away, for h if I do not go away, i the Helper will not come to you. But j if k I go, l I will send him to you. 8 m And when he comes, he will n convict the world concerning sin and righteousness and judgment: 9concerning sin, o because they do not believe in me; — Anonymous

When I'm in the car, I want the only one shouting to be me. — P. J. O'Rourke

I'm absolutely, l00 percent, not guilty. — O.J. Simpson

A cocktail party is what you call it when you invite everyone you know to come over to your house at six p.m., put cigarettes out on your rug, and leave at eight to go somewhere more interesting for dinner without inviting you. — P. J. O'Rourke

m sorry about that," O'Connell apologised.

"No problem. She seemed nice," I replied.

Both boys burst out laughing — R.J. Prescott

The Coming of the Lord 13But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, g that you may not grieve as others do h who have no hope. 14For i since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him j those who have fallen asleep. 15For this we declare to you k by a word from the Lord, [4] that l we who are alive, who are left until m the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. 16For n the Lord himself will descend o from heaven p with a cry of command, with the voice of q an archangel, and r with the sound of the trumpet of God. And s the dead in Christ will rise first. 17Then we who are alive, who are left, will be t caught up together with them u in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so v we will always be with the Lord. 18Therefore encourage one another with these words. — Anonymous

Walk in Love EPHESIANS 5 j Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. 2And k walk in love, l as Christ loved us and m gave himself up for us, a n fragrant o offering and sacrifice to God. 3But p sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness q must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. 4Let there be r no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, s which are out of place, but instead t let there be thanksgiving. 5For you may be sure of this, that u everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous ( v that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. 6 w Let no one x deceive you with empty words, for because of these things y the wrath of God comes upon z the sons of disobedience. 7Therefore a do not become partners with them; 8for b at one time you were c darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. d Walk as children of light — Anonymous

At their core, Tiger Eyes, Forever ... , and Sally J. Freeman are all books about teenage issues, but to an adult reader, the parents' story lines seem to almost overshadow their daughters. I'm bringing an entirely new set of experiences to these novels now, and my reward is a fresh set of story lines that i missed the first time around. I'm sure that in twenty or thirty years I'll read these books again and completely identify with all the grandparent characteristics. That's the wonderful thing about Judy Blume - you can revisit her stories at any stage in life and find a character who strikes a deep chord of recognition. I've been there, I'm in the middle of this, someday that'll be me. The same characters, yet somehow completely different. (Beth Kendrick) — Jennifer O'Connell

THE CHRISTIAN ALPHABETS
A = AMEN
B = BAPTISM
C = CHRISTIAN
D = DISCIPLE
F = FELLOWSHIP
G = GOD
H = HOLY SPIRIT
I = INSPIRATION
J = JESUS CHRIST
K = KINGDOM
L = LOVE
M = MODERATION
N = NEW BIRTH
O = OBEDIENCE
P = PRAYER
Q = QUIET TIME
R = RIGHTEOUSNESS
S = SALVATION
T = TESTIMONY
U = UNDERSTANDING
V = VISION
W = WISDOM
X = XMAS
Y = YEA & AMEN
Z = ZION
BY : ADEWALE OSUNSAKIN — Osunsakin Adewale

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. — P. J. O'Rourke

A lot of fellows nowadays have a B.A., M.D., or Ph.D. Unfortunately, they don't have a J.O.B. — Fats Domino

I look around my house, and everything except the kids and dogs was made in China. And I'm not sure about the kids. They have brown eyes and small noses. — P. J. O'Rourke

Ann Coulter to me is someone who says things that I say all the time, but I say them at three in the morning when I'm drunk as a monkey. She says them at three in the afternoon stone sober in bright daylight. — P. J. O'Rourke

Life was good to me. I had a great wife, good kids, money, my own health
and I'm lonely and bored. — O.J. Simpson

Ministry of Magic (M.O.M) Classification.
xxxxx Known wizard killer / impossible to train or domesticate / or anything Hagrid likes — J.K. Rowling

There's one more terrifying fact about old people: I'm going to be one soon. — P. J. O'Rourke

14Since therefore the children share in flesh and blood, he himself likewise h partook of the same things, that i through death he might j destroy k the one who has the power of death, that is, the devil, 15and deliver all those who l through fear of death were subject to lifelong slavery. 16For surely it is not angels that he helps, but he m helps the offspring of Abraham. 17Therefore he had n to be made like his brothers in every respect, o so that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest p in the service of God, to make propitiation for the sins of the people. 18For because he himself has suffered q when tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted. — Anonymous

We need to find you a man. You're conjuring Cinderfellas. — M. J. O'Shea

I'm a what?" gasped Harry.
"A wizard, o' course," said Hagrid, sitting back down on the sofa, which groaned and sank even lower, "an' a thumpin' good'un I'd say, once yeh've been trained up a bit. With a mum an' dad like yours, what else would yeh be? — J.K. Rowling

Hey,maybe I could have a talk show, since you aren't going to be my June Cleaver anymore. I could call it the O'Neal Hour. Sounds important, doesn't it?" [Butch to Vishous]
"First of all, you were going to be June Cleaver-"
"Screw that. No way I'd bottom for you."
"Whatever. And second, I don't think there's much of a market for your particular brand of psychology."
"So not true."
"Butch, you and I just beat the crap out of each other."
"You started it. And actually, it would be perfect for Spike TV. UFC meets Oprah. God, I'm brilliant."
"Keep telling yourself that. — J.R. Ward

People say, 'Oh, politics is so polarized today,' and I'm thinking ... '1861, that was polarized.' — P. J. O'Rourke

I could barely manage myself sometimes, let alone some miniature kleinman person whose sole method of communication was crying. How would I know what she wanted? How would I keep her happy? — M. J. O'Shea

Would you change who you were to be with the one person you were meant to love? — M. J. O'Shea

By ten o'clock, the Sunday-night blues set in. The bleak wasteland of an entire week of stupefyingly boring school stretched ahead of me like an endless desert highway. — J.M. Steele

It can't be supposed," said Joe. "Tho' I'm oncommon fond of reading, too."
Are you, Joe?"
Oncommon. Give me," said Joe, "a good book, or a good newspaper, and sit me down afore a good fire, and I ask no better. Lord!" he continued, after rubbing his knees a little, "when you do come to a J and a O, and says you, 'Here, at last, is a J-O, Joe,' how interesting reading is! — Charles Dickens

Little islands of human happiness, peace, and prosperity are so exceptional at this point in history that I'm not even sure we can draw lessons from them. — P. J. O'Rourke

I'm enjoying the money, the big house, the cars; what ghetto kid wouldn't? — O.J. Simpson

8Do not be like them, e for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. 9 f Pray then like this: g Our Father in heaven, h hallowed be i your name. [1] 10 j Your kingdom come, k your will be done, [2] l on earth as it is in heaven. 11 m Give us n this day our daily bread, [3] 12 and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. 13 And o lead us not into temptation, but p deliver us from q evil. [4] 14 r For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, 15 s but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. — Anonymous

A friend of mine at the American Enterprise Institute says there are two parties: the silly party and the stupid party. I'm too old for the silly party, so I had to join the stupid party. — P. J. O'Rourke

I blame feminism and Facebook for the death of the American automobile. I'm a Republican, so I blame everything on feminism - or commies. — P. J. O'Rourke

I'm a rather decisive type. — P. J. O'Rourke

I'm a political conservative. — P. J. O'Rourke

Fortunately, I'm married to someone who's a pretty excellent parent! — P. J. O'Rourke

I'm on Medicare now. If I go and have a big operation, it costs me nothing. It should cost me a little. I'm not rich, but I can afford a few grand if I have to have my appendix taken out. I can pitch in a little bit. — P. J. O'Rourke

Gimme an S! A T! An O! A C! Followed by a K-H-O-L-M! What's it spell? HEAD FUCK.
- Jane — J.R. Ward