Intelligence Humour Quotes & Sayings

None of this made any sense to Benjamin, however hard he tried. Roll-Up Reg was talking another language. But then, he was no more persuaded by the things his parents told him, or the teachers at school. It was the world, the world itself that was beyond his reach, this whole absurdly vast, complex, random, measureless construct, this never-ending ebb and flow of human relations, political relations, cultures, histories . . . How could anyone hope to master such things? It was not like music. Music always made sense. The music he heard that night was lucid, knowable, full of intelligence and humour, wistfulness and energy and hope. He would never understand the world, but he would always love this music. — Jonathan Coe

Geralt finished his mug of herb tea, grimacing dreadfully. He valued and liked the settled elves for their intelligence, calm reserve and sense of humour, but he couldn't understand or share their taste in food or drink. — Andrzej Sapkowski

The qualities I am looking for in Miss Right are intelligence and humour. — Brendan Coyle

An intelligent man will use a book to settle an argument. Preferably a hardback with a thick spine, flat across the bridge of the nose. — Shatrujeet Nath

This is Kester Baleen and Ajex Cristo,' Jared introduced. 'One born without common sense and another with too much intelligence.'

'Yeah, and what about you Dernell?' Kester retorted back. 'Born with a dry sense of humour. — Deepika Kumaaraguru

The earliest intelligence of the travellers' safe arrival at Antigua, after a favourable voyage, was received; though not before Mrs. Norris had been indulging in very dreadful fears, and trying to make Edmund participate them whenever she could get him alone; and as she depended on being the first person made acquainted with any fatal catastrophe, she had already arranged the manner of breaking it to all the others, when Sir Thomas's assurances of their both being alive and well made it necessary to lay by her agitation and affectionate preparatory speeches for a while. — Jane Austen

Ken appeared, was taller than she, wanted her, was acceptable and accepted on all sides; similarly, nagging mathematical problems abruptly crack open. Foxy could find no fault with him, and this challenged her, touched off her stubborn defiant streak. She felt between his handsomeness and intelligence a contradiction that might develop into the convoluted humour of her Jew. Ken looked lika a rich boy and worked like a poor one. From Farmington, he was the only son of a Hartford laywer who never lost a case. Foxy came to imagine his birth as cool and painless, without a tear or outcry. Nothing puzzled him. There were unknowns, but no mysteries. ( ... ) He was better-looking, better-thinking, a better machine. — John Updike

...without intelligence, there can be no humour. — Miguel De Cervantes Saavedra

It is not that I believe that there are too many idiots in this world, just that lightning isn't distributed right. — Mark Twain

Miss Climpson," said Lord Peter, "is a manifestation of the wasteful way in which this country is run. Look at electricity, Look at water-power. Look at the tides. Look at the sun. Millions of power units being given off into space every minute. Thousands of old maids, simply bursting with useful energy, forced by our stupid social system into hydros and hotels and communities and hostels and posts as companions, where their magnificent gossip-powers and units of inquisitiveness are allowed to dissipate themselves or even become harmful to the community, while the ratepayers' money is spent on getting work for which these women are providentially fitted, inefficiently carried out by ill-equipped policemen like you. — Dorothy L. Sayers

Are you smarter than my chicken?" cried a weathered, wild-haired woman holding a nonplussed bird over her head. At her feet was a wooden board covered with numbers and arcane symbols. "Lay your bets! Test your wits against a trained fowl! One coppin a try! Are you smarter than my chicken? You might be in for a surprise! — Scott Lynch

Henry Kissinger is possessed of a truly superior intelligence, in addition to which he has two qualities which, unfortunately, many great men lack: he is able to listen and he has a very subtle sense of humour. — Mohammed Reza Pahlavi

Maple thought optimistically that human beings, on their good days, weren't much dimmer than sheep. Or at least, not much dimmer than dim sheep. — Leonie Swann

I'm thinking we ought to rethink the whole self-esteem thing. It should almost be a dirty word. I mean, look at Kayla. She has the intelligence of a tree stump, and its sense of humour. She's less about real attractiveness than she is about advertising ... She's the kind of girl who shows how hot she is because she has nothing else to offer, who doesn't realise that hotness has an expiration date. Yet, I'm still a little nervous talking to her like she's holding a lottery ticket she just might or might not decide to hand over to me. It is nuts, if you stop to think about it. I give give her this power, and it's kind of like voting some idiot into office. But hey, we're good at that, too. — Deb Caletti

Technically, you don't pay me.
And technically, most of what I do is "think."
I ... rrr. ummm.
And when you get right down to it, I'm better at it than you are.
-Ennesby & Captain Tagon — Howard Tayler

Research shows that most of the decisions are made within the first four minutes, far too soon for personality and intelligence to be properly assessed. Among the characteristics that emerge as favorable are self-assurance, eye contact, enthusiasm, cologne, a firm handshake and spectacles. Humour may be beneficial but not if it comes across as smart-arse, competitive or hostile. — Glen Wilson

Colon thought Carrot was simple. Carrot often struck people as simple. And he was.
Where people went wrong was thinking that simple meant the same thing as stupid. — Terry Pratchett

My father lived life to the fullest, even though it was cut short at a young age in 1962. He was known for his intelligence, wit, wisdom, a wonderful sense of humour, a great personality, and a genuine goodwill towards all. — Ajay Mehta

The Tausennigan Ob'enn warlords look like cuddly teddy-bears?"
"Yes, they do, and they'd cheerfully exterminate your entire race for making that observation!"
"I guess that explains their rich military history, then. — Howard Tayler

Anyone looking at you would write you off as a brainless nincompoop with about as much intelligence as a dead rabbit. — P.G. Wodehouse