Inflatable Quotes & Sayings

By the time I get home, I will have grimaced through 26 sets of traffic lights and acquired the following: a hefty wood-carving of a horse; a censored girlie calendar; an inflatable Power Ranger; a chess set; nine boiled sweets; two slices of salted pineapple; a fake Rolex; three kretek cigarettes and a blowpipe. — Derek Bacon

One day, I decided to be an island. I took off my clothes and walked into the sea, then floated there, bobbing along with the tide, suspended by my inflatable tube and water wings. — Ng Yi-Sheng

We're the propaganda monkeys.
The digital download junkies.
The skunk smoking geezers
With an inflatable Jesus.
We're the kitsch and cool.
Divide and rule. — Harry Whitewolf

When you have kids, your castle becomes their bouncy castle. In my case, this is literally true. Jimmy Kimmel bought Sonny and Natalia this inflatable castle in 2012. It's the real deal. At first, I thought he had rented it. No, he bought it. — Adam Carolla

December is celebrated quite heartily here in the United States. Aggresively, one might say. Every conceivable space is corseted with strands of twinkle lights, buildings are smothered beneath greenery, and a mass mania for erecting oversized, inflatable, waving "snowmen" in front of homes erupts amid the populace. It's quite a hysteria- and the evergreen trees are not just a myth, Vasile. People really do purchase them, in abundance. They are for sale everywhere. Imagine paying for the privilege of dragging a filthy piece of forest into your living area for the purpose of bedecking it with glass balls and staring at it.
Why a tree? If one needed to display glass balls-and I highly discorage it-why not just a case of some sort? A rack? — Beth Fantaskey

My father has developed a tradition of surprising us at some point by appearing in fancy dress. He buys a new costume each year and typically gets carried away. A couple of Christmases ago he appeared in an inflatable sumo outfit. It's endearing, really, and only quite embarrassing. — Pippa Middleton

This raises the interesting, if seemingly outlandish, question of why car drivers, virtually alone among users of wheeled transport, do not wear helmets. Yes, cars do provide a nice metal cocoon with inflatable cushions. But in Australia, for example, head injuries among car occupants, according to research by the Federal Office of Road Safety, make up half the country's traffic-injury costs. Helmets, cheaper and more reliable than side-impact air bags, would reduce injuries and cut fatalities by some 25 percent.95 A crazy idea, perhaps, but so were air bags once. — Tom Vanderbilt

Ever since about 3.8 billion years ago, when the first cells began quivering in the primordial ooze, Evolution has produced a nonstop parade of inflatable noses, bizarre genitalia, awkward feeding habits, aggressively antisocial tendencies, and mucus. So much mucus. — Mara Grunbaum

Larry King has been married more times than Henry the Eighth. We used to have that rhyme to keep track of them. 'Divorced, beheaded, died. Divorced, beheaded, survived.' With Larry I think it goes, 'Divorced, beheaded, divorced, escaped. Zombie, lesbian, disappeared, inflatable. — Craig Ferguson

When I was a kid, Halloween was strictly a starchy-vegetable-only holiday, with pumpkins and Indian corn on the front stoop; there was nothing electric, nothing inflatable, nothing with latex membranes or strobes. — Susan Orlean

This rain is crazy, huh?"

"Yeah. Hope your ark-building skills are decent, or we could be in trouble."

"We don't need an ark. I have some inflatable pool lounges. They have cup holders."

"Fancy."

"No expense spared to save my woman from the watery apocalypse."

"Nothing says 'I love you' more than quality recreational inflatables."

He makes a noise. "Now I have visions of that inflatable sheep Avery bought for his pool."

"We said we'd never discuss that. — Leisa Rayven

Would you buy a giant inflatable jumping castle if you had no children and no garden to put it in? No? Then why would you eat food that you didn't need and didn't enjoy? It's just as nonsensical. — Ingrid Lindberg

Roddy the assistant manager lived in the theater. He'd emptied out one of the supply closets. He'd installed an inflatable mattress, a Shower Anywhere portable shower, and a wee television. He slept amid the powdered-butter fumes and empty drink-syrup tanks. He had grub-white skin and Goth circles under his eyes that, unlike those of Goths, came from really, truly existing half in the world of the dead. He smelled like carpeting, Scotch tape, and steak sauce. He was almost forty but had one of those half mustaches that thirteen-year-olds have. He was the closest thing to a zombie I've yet encountered in this world. — Patton Oswalt

On the way, I shared the backseat of Feyerabend's little sports car with the inflatable raft he kept there in case an 8-point earthquake came while he was on the Bay Bridge. — Lee Smolin

For my birthday that year Anne gave me an inflatable atlas globe, along with a birthday card in which she wrote:
I give you the world.
Have fun blowing it up. — Craig Ferguson

Bex ... why did you buy an inflatable canoe?'
'It's for you to lie on. Or something.'
'And a watering can?'
'I couldn't find a plant spray.'Breathlessly I start shoving bags into the taxi.
'But why do I need a plant spray?'
'Look,it wasn't my idea, OK?' I say defensively. — Sophie Kinsella

Will held up an inflatable male doll with a beer belly and a hairy chest, and waved its appendage at me that wasn't an arm or a leg. That image would stick with me. — Ashlan Thomas

Driving home, I am struck by the sudden thought that the world is inflatable, trees and grass and houses ready to collapse with the single prick of a pin. I have the sense that if I veer the car to the left, smash through the picket fence and the little Tykes playground, it will bounce us back like a rubber bumper. — Jodi Picoult

I assumed he would be busy with some inflatable whore! Or did she round a corner to fast and bust a tit on her way here? — Jennifer Loren

Jesus, Dean. I don't know why you have me around with her watching your back"
"You're just jealous. But don't worry. One day you too will have your very own little Amazon."
"I'll just settle for a woman."
"If you're lonely, you can have the inflatable sex doll Blue gave me for my birthday. I don't want the two
of you to miss out on an opportunity for love."
"You didn't like her?"
"I wasn't man enough to satisfy her cravings. I'm sure you'll be different. — Marjorie M. Liu

Grandma was wearing a blond Marilyn Monroe wig, a hot pink tank top, black Pilates pants, and black kitten heels. She looked like the senior version of an inflatable sex toy doll that needed more air. — Janet Evanovich

I had a date with an inflatable girl. Now I got an inflatable guy looking for me. — Rodney Dangerfield

American sex shops are the most bizarre. They sell these inflatable dolls, but they also sell just the head
supposedly for people to drive along the highway with. — Billy Connolly

Indiana was such a devout disciple of Shakti that she had once considered taking her name until her father, Blake Jackson, managed to convince her that a Hindu goddess's name was not appropriate for a tall, voluptuous blond American with the looks of an inflatable doll. — Isabel Allende

During the First World War, I told her, Hitler had been a runner, delivering messages between the German trenches, and he was disgusted by seeing his fellow soldiers visit French brothels. To keep the Aryan bloodlines pure,and prevent the spread of venereal disease, he commissioned an inflatable doll that Nazi troops could take into battle. Hitler himself designed the dolls to have blond hair and large breasts. The Allied firebombing of Dresden destroyed the factory before the dolls could ever go into wide distribution. — Chuck Palahniuk

So, to do right by a Gothic tale, let's be frank, requires that the author be a militant romantic who relates the action of his narratives in dreamy and more than usually emotive language. Hence, the well-known grandiose rhetoric of the Gothic tale, which may be understood by the sympathetic reader as not just an inflatable raft on which the imagination floats at its leisure upon waves of bombast, but also as the sails of the Gothic artist's soul filling up with the winds of ecstatic hysteria. So it's hard to tell someone how to write the Gothic tale, since one really has to be born to the task. Too bad. — Thomas Ligotti

When I turned 11, my dad decorated a room at the Standard hotel in Los Angeles in a '60s, Austin Powers style. There was human bowling: You run inside a giant inflatable ball and try to knock down pins. To this day, adults say it was one of the craziest parties they've ever been to. — Zoe Kravitz

I waved to you outside but then I realized it was just one of those inflatable parking lot gorillas. — Jane Lynch

I'm losing air over here, you know," Lassiter bitched. "My inflatable is deflating." V cursed. "That's because it doesn't want to be around you any more than we do. — J.R. Ward

The female covers her breasts, and then proceeds to redefine their shape with a brassiere. This sexual signaling device may be padded or inflatable, so that it not only reinstates the concealed shape, but also enlarges it, imitating in this way the breast swelling that occurs during sexual arousal. — Desmond Morris

What do you think? The last party she threw for you, you
came home with an inflatable cock on your head as a tiara, totally drunk,
singing 'Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!' and carrying a huge basket full of sex toys. — Elle Aycart