Humorous Names Quotes & Sayings

Pure hearts will be Christlike. It is God's desire that we be conformed to the image of His Son. — Billy Graham

A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. "What shall we name the other one?" I smiled. She was not amused. — Erma Bombeck

Just because you're old that doesn't mean you're more forgetful. The same people whose names I can't remember now I couldn't remember fifty years ago ... — George Burns

There isn't often anything in Wagner opera that one would call by such a violent name as acting. — Mark Twain

I have a poor memory for names; but I seldom remember a face. — W.C. Fields

By the way, I have a bone to pick with you." Esperetta
"Only one?" Velkan
"At the moment." Esperetta
"Then I can't wait to hear it." Velkan
"'Bram' and 'Stoker'?" Esperetta
"It was fitting, I thought." Velkan — Sherrilyn Kenyon

He was a thin, elegant-looking man with precise symmetrical features and the hushed, disapproving manner of a senior librarian. — Alastair Reynolds

Wouldn't it be good if we could let teachers do what they do best - teach. Not judge each child on a series of standardized exams. Let schools embrace, not exclude, those like me with a different way of thinking.
Stop praising literacy with one hand and closing libraries with the other. Let librarians be free to do what they do best: encourage a lifelong love of reading in every child, even the ones without a hope of ever getting an A star. — Sally Gardner

I am not going to tell you my name, not yet at any rate.' A queer half-knowing, half-humorous look came with a green flicker into his eyes. 'For one thing it would take a long while: my name is growing all the time, and I've lived a very long, long time; so my name is like a story. Real names tell you the story of things they belong to in my language, in the Old Entish as you might say. It is a lovely language, but it takes a very long time saying anything in it, because we do not say anything in it, unless it is worth taking a long time to say, and to listen to. — J.R.R. Tolkien

Squeej? What kind of name was that for a pilot? — Jack McDevitt

Famous designers think nothing of putting their names on your clothing, but would have the servants set the dogs on you if you ever tried to put your name on their clothing. — Dave Barry

Sygmnd was a poor Austrian who'd lost all the vowels in his name in a boating accident. — Woody Allen

I'm an American, our names don't mean shit. — Quentin Tarantino

After giving it some thought, I've decided to name my monkey mind Ricky Bobby. I was thinking about Latin names like Javier, but I don't want to make my jumping, distractable self sound mysterious and sexy. Ricky Bobby makes me laugh. A name like that seems silly, not strong. Just a goofy little thing that doesn't know what to do with its hands, likes to go fast, and loves tiny, infant, baby Jesus. — Anna White

Indeed, moderation is my middle name (though I do not often use it in signing legal documents) — W.C. Fields

The Democrats are going to change the name of the Hoover Dam. That is the silliest thing I ever heard of in politics ... Lord if they feel that way about it, I don't see why they don't just reverse the two words. — Will Rogers

We named all our children Kid. Well, they have different first names, like Hey Kid, You Kid, Dumb Kid ... — Phyllis Diller

WARNING: This is assuming your spouse's name is Margaret. — Dave Barry

Women are like bars of soap. After a while they lose their freshness, become worn and a bit hairy. — Robert Black

I'm getting older, and it happens. You don't care as much. I don't care about too much anymore. I've got to think about that a little bit. — Adam Sandler

I want you to be on my side." My words crushed him, I could see. But I couldn't move as I turned to go. He didn't make me beg to be released; he kindly showed me mercy. He softly rumbled, "I'll see you later. Go ahead and go, check on your dad. Everything will be fine." If he wasn't with me he was against me, and my saying so obviously meant that I thought he wasn't. — Shelly Crane

Whoso shrinks from ideas ends by having nothing but sensations. — Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

There are times when every act, no matter how private or unconscious, becomes political. Whom you live with, how you wear your hair, whether you marry, whether you insist that your child take piano lessons, what are the brand names on your shelf; all these become political decisions. At other times, no act
no campaign or tract, statement or rampage
has any political charge at all. People with the least sense of which times are, and which are not, political are usually most avid about politics. At six one morning, Will went out in jeans and a frayed sweater to buy a quart of milk. A tourist bus went by. The megaphone was directed at him. "There's one," it said. That was in the 1960's. Ever since, he's wondered. There's one what? — Renata Adler

Letting go does not mean not caring about things. It means caring for them in a flexible and wise way. In meditation, we pay attention to our body with care and respect. — Jack Kornfield

People make a lot of fuss about my kids having such supposedly 'strange names', but the fact is that no matter what first names I might have given them, it is the last name that is going to get them in trouble. — Frank Zappa

Should I marry W.? Not if she won't tell me the other letters in her name. — Woody Allen

If it is a joint return, we are instructed to print the given names of both husband and wife. But since some of the names that husband and wife give each other are hardly suited to print, we must proceed cautiously. — W.C. Fields