Humorous Bartender Quotes & Sayings

She said, "'Ye can we get married at the mall?"
I said, "Look, you need to crawl 'fore you ball
Come and meet me in the bathroom stall
And show me why you deserve to have it all" — Kanye West

Panic is the sudden realization that everything around you is alive. — William S. Burroughs

If we were all looking for something 'easy come and easy go', then all of our lives would be easy. The problem is that we look for something real, don't we? And it is this longing for what is real, that makes finding the right person to be the most difficult task in the world. You can marry someone and promise the rest of your life to the person, only to find out later that this person makes you feel lonely. If we had no innate longing for true love and for true partnership, then none of us would have any problems! Therefore, the most frightening question to ponder upon, is, 'what if true love does not exist; what if the real stuff isn't real at all?' In such a case, life would be meaningless. I suppose I would rather believe in love relentlessly, than live in this world meaninglessly. — C. JoyBell C.

My job as Labour Home Secretary is to ensure people are prepared to listen to us when we take on our opponents across the political spectrum. — David Blunkett

The stuff you do is way more important than the stuff you believe. — Jon Skovron

The ones that rip my heart from my chest are the little ones. The children, with tangled hair and dirty clothes, covering their own ugly secrets. And all they ask of me is shelter, food to warm their hollowness, a bed free of nightmares.
They look at me, and through me. And it's hard to tell who's more haunted
them or me. — Ellen Hopkins

I do not object to the phenomena, but I do object to the parrot. — Stella Gibbons

If Bobby can get a place to live, I think, then I can get a life worth living. — Ned Vizzini

I believe that such constant realization ennobles one automatically. One's stature is greater, one's step more elastic, one's aura more powerful; and it makes other people see that Light in one's eyes which attracts people to him who has it. — Walter Russell