Humorista Tio Quotes & Sayings

Harpernus Stoyan, if you can't behave yourself and go and turn all Roman hands and Russian Fingers under that comforter, you're going to have to sit on the couch, Stephanie snapped, sounding for all the world like a stern schoolteacher. — Lynsay Sands

I lock all my scaredness down in my stomach until the fear hardens into something I hardly notice. I myself harden into a person that I hardly notice. — Mary Karr

I didn't want to become some embittered old hack getting his revenge for the rest of my life. And I didn't want to become some scared creature cowering in a corner. I remember telling myself not to carry the hatred around, although I know where it is. I have it in a trunk in storage. — Salman Rushdie

Weightless is a great equalizer. — Sally Ride

I can't get too offended when somebody parodies me. — Al Yankovic

Don't judge a man's conscience by looking at his face cause he may have a bad heart. — William Shakespeare

The only happy author in this world is he who is below the care of reputation. — Washington Irving

My journey to the land of the Shuar tribe had taught me the importance of practical gifts. — Tahir Shah

We were stumbling sluts married to mud. When the war was over, nobody bothered to tell us. Our tragedy was permanent. No records were kept of us anywhere. We shuffled through ruined villages aimlessly. Anyone who had a menial, pointless job to do had only to wave us down and we would do it ... On and on Helga spun her yarn, weaving a biography on the crazy loom of modern history. — Kurt Vonnegut

Let me put it this way. Love is like learning how to dance. When you first hear the music, you're full of passion and you don't care who's watching because you just want to fling yourself around like an idiot. It's clumsy and it's full of missteps and falls and sometimes you're not even dancing to the same tune, but you don't notice because you're so carried away by the music.
But then the music begins to wane, and you start stepping on each other's toes. Some think that's the truth of the relationship and run. But the truth is, that's where true love begins. That's when you start to learn each other's rhythm and how to move together. And if you stick with it long enough, you might even learn to be graceful. — Richard Paul Evans

It's only a must-win game if you need to win it — Roy Aitken

I'm not fully hard yet, but that's only because I don't feel the rush of lust right now. I feel the glow of love. — J.A. Huss

When human beings stop progressing at an endeavor, they stop enjoying it and move on to something else. Not golfers. Masochists, all of them. — Jay Mohr

You really think I should be able to do that to you, Garrett?" Ty asked.
"Why the hell would I be on alert in my own bedroom with no pants on when the only threat is my husband stomping around in a shitty mood? — Abigail Roux