Hot Pockets Jim Gaffigan Quotes & Sayings

The reality is not exactly what the song started out to be, but it's not a bad song. — Robert James Waller

There is the vegetarian Hot Pocket for those of us who don't want to eat meat, but would still like diarrhea. — Jim Gaffigan

Liars ought to have good memories. — Algernon Sydney Logan

I do kind of aspire to do comedy that appeals to a wide range of audiences and doesn't divide people. I never want to do material that makes people laugh at the expense of making other people feel bad - not to say I'm not guilty of that at times ... I try and make humor out of the really important issues of the day, like Hot Pockets and elevators and not wanting to get out of bed. — Jim Gaffigan

What was the idea behind Hot Pockets? Was there a marketing meeting somewhere, 'Hey I got an idea: How about we take a Pop-Tart and fill it with really nasty meat? You could cook it in a sleeve thing, and you could dunk it in the toilet.' — Jim Gaffigan

That he required me to service him. To think of him above everything else. To allow myself to be willingly used by him in any way he desired. It was why I was a sick person. — Laurelin Paige

I like being in charge of the remote control. — Cilla Black

Although I had lived a far from perfect life, my heart and soul belonged to God, country, and family long before the Navy got hold of me. — Jeremiah Denton

Once the current of awareness of the self is set afoot, it becomes everlasting and continuous by intensification. — Ramana Maharshi

I feel like I've been waiting," I said to Billy, looking at Hank. "Waiting for a long time, but I guess I know what you mean. My life began when I met him. — Kristen Ashley

Besides hot pockets keeps introducing new products every 10 minutes so I always have new stuff on the topic. — Jim Gaffigan

Author describes one monarch's impressive table but conveys a contemporary's observation, "the weightiest thing at dinner was the conversation". — Peter Heather

I strongly believe that marriage should be defined as between a man and a woman. I am troubled by activist judges who are defining marriage. I have watched carefully what's happened in San Francisco, where licenses were being issued even though the law states otherwise. I have consistently stated that if-I'll support law to protect marriage between a man and a woman. And obviously these events are influencing my decision. — George W. Bush

She would have liked to know how he felt as to a meeting. Perhaps indifferent, if indifference could exist under such circumstances. He must be either indifferent or unwilling. Has he wished ever to see her again, he need not have waited till this time; he would have done what she could not but believe that in his place she should have done long ago, when events had been early giving him the indepencence which alone had been wanting. — Jane Austen

Some people that work for Hot Pockets came to my Denver Paramount Theater show. They brought these hot pocket boxes the size of suit cases for me to sign. I wrote "these are WMD's" on the boxes. The HP people seem to have a good sense of humor about all of it. — Jim Gaffigan

When you change, everything will change for you.
When you get better, everything will get better for you. — Jim Rohn