Gorilla Quotes & Sayings

Humans were the only creatures in the world that ate their food cooked. You'd never find a Gorilla frying up some bananas for dinner or a lion charcoal-broiling a zebra steak. Cats don't often run to the oven with a mouse or bird they've captured, and a dog wouldn't naturally prepare its rabbit dinner in a stew. — Dick Gregory

I was a gorilla boxer. I had a full gorilla suit on with boxing gloves. I had an amateur belt on. No one knew that it was me in the costume and I was going into stores and scaring people and boxing on them. It was fun. — Daniel Jacobs

The problem with feminists is that they're so motivated by competing against men that they end up becoming more masculine than men themselves, which makes them start complaining that men aren't masculine enough. Well, when you become more masculine than men, only a gorilla can satisfy you, and that's why such women end up with bad boys. When they marry them, they then complain that their husband is an idiot. This whole time, they can't see that they've destroyed everything along the way by simply refusing to just, and simply, be a woman. Because, you see, there's nothing wrong with that. There's nothing wrong with being a woman. But there are many things terribly wrong with being a feminist. — Daniel Marques

When it comes to global warming, coal is the gorilla in the room. — Jeff Goodell

Growing up gorilla is just like any other kind of growing up. You make mistakes. You play. You learn. You do it all over again. — Katherine Applegate

The irresistible force meets the immovable object. — Gorilla Monsoon

What is missing from today's dialogue is the effect autism is having on families, our society and what the unknown factors are. The 300lb. gorilla in the room is that our children with autism today will soon become adults with autism. — Jenny McCarthy

Force me to choose my best book, and I always come back to 'Gorilla.' It was the first time I felt I understood what picture books could do. — Anthony Browne

The problem with object-oriented languages is they've got all this implicit environment that they carry around with them. You wanted a banana but what you got was a gorilla holding the banana and the entire jungle. — Joe Armstrong

A lion does not flinch at laughter coming from a hyena. A gorilla does not budge from a banana thrown at it by a monkey. A nightingale does not stop singing its beautiful song at the intrusion of an annoying woodpecker. — Suzy Kassem

I feel more comfortable with gorillas than people. I can anticipate what a gorilla's going to do, and they're purely motivated. — Dian Fossey

I was the naughty kid that the teachers liked. I bullied a kid in the 1st year when I was in the 2nd, who then hit puberty like a plane crash and grew into a gorilla who bullied me when he was in the 4th year and I was in the 5th. That's Karma. — Simon Pegg

With gorilla gone, will there be hope for man? — Daniel Quinn

I should like to see any kind of man, distinguishable from a gorilla, that some good and even pretty woman could not shape a husband out of. — Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

Regarded anatomically, the resemblances between the foot of Man and the foot of the Gorilla are far more striking and important than the differences ... be the differences between the hand and foot of Man and those of the Gorilla what they may the differences between those of the Gorilla and those of the lower Apes are much greater. — Thomas Huxley

He was the captain of the rugby team and he was built like a fucking gorilla. He had the personality of a fucking gorilla, too. — S.A. Tawks

Anybody can make hood music or club records, that's not hard. But can you make music that touch people's souls. That's what I was out to do. — Gorilla Zoe

I used to take culinary arts at Job Corps so I'm a certified chef. I could cook chicken alfredo. — Gorilla Zoe

Quite recently the human descent theory has been stigmatized as the 'gorilla theory of human ancestry.' All this despite the fact that Darwin himself, in the days when not a single bit of evidence regarding the fossil ancestors of man was recognized, distinctly stated that none of the known anthropoid apes, much less any of the known monkeys, should be considered in any way as ancestral to the human stock. — Henry Fairfield Osborn

Where does a child of mine get all that hair, I wonder? Arthur's not exceptionally hirsute, and the men on my side of the family are as bald as potatoes. I must have had an affair with a gorilla before he was born, but you'd think I'd remember something like that, wouldn't you? ... Be a dear and remind me to leave my brandy flask at home the next time I visit the zoo. — Bart Yates

The Gorilla Foundation, like a tree or cloud or other thing from nature, seems to mostly present itself only to an ideal, abstract, fully internalized audience - one that does not question sincerity or intent, that does not require justification or meaning, that would rather The Gorilla Foundation not pause (to defend itself, to allow others time to comprehend it) but to continue always with what it's already doing. In this manner The Gorilla Foundation exists more in actualization of itself than in opposition to something else, which implies, to some degree, that it doesn't earnestly believe it - or anything - "needs" to exist or is "right" or "wrong," rather that its "mission" is a temporary concept, created by itself to directionalize itself, that without which [The Gorilla Foundation] wouldn't exist. — Tao Lin

I had never planned to become a savanna baboon when I grew up; instead, I had always assumed I would become a mountain gorilla. — Robert M. Sapolsky

Sex with the gorilla went on a bit, but once he'd stumbled over my clitoris we both had good times. — Sue Townsend

The Chief had once told him about the behavior of gorillas when faced with an attack. They met it head on, staring down the enemy. But every now and then they'd reach out to touch the gorilla beside them. To make sure they were not alone. Keeping his eyes on the road, Jean-Guy reached out and touched Gamache's shoulder. — Louise Penny

I have no patience whatever with these gorilla damnifications of humanity. — Thomas Carlyle

Up until the mid twentieth century the mountain gorilla was considered a myth. Oddly enough, a legend not unlike bigfoot or the loch ness monster. The chance of actually seeing/experiencing this elusive shadow was as likely as finding ones soulmate. Rare. Precious. Even once discovered they seemed unapproachable. The only way to get close to this magnificent creature was to become empathetic. Abandon all pretense and preconceptions. To bare an open throat. To collapse into the arms of vulnerability. All but extinct, these beings/moments are threatened by the black hearted. The cold and oblivious. The empty eyed profit seekers that overlook these rare precious moments. — Maynard James Keenan

Put another way, the chimpanzees' closest relative is not the gorilla but humans. — Jared Diamond

Frazier soaked it all up like a sponge. When they arrived in Manila it was the same story. Ali poured scorn on his opponent. Humiliated him. Joe had the heart of a lion but verbally he was out of his depth when Ali got going. One time, as fight day approached, Ali spotted Frazier on a hotel balcony, grabbed a security guard's gun and fired some rounds at him. Everybody knew it wasn't live ammo but it still startled the hell out of Joe.] Go back in your hole, Gorilla, You gonna scare the people! Come out again and I'm gonna kill ya before time! — Muhammad Ali

It is only when the mirror has not spoken to Chimpanzee in a plain language that it thinks it looks more better than the Gorilla — Ernest Agyemang Yeboah

We Westerners will shell out our gold and even lay down our lives for the endangered mountain gorilla," he continued. "But does anyone raise a finger when five million human souls are sent to hell? — Elliott Garber

Finally the gorilla queen had had enough. She wrote a letter to the editor of Baboons' Home Journal and asked for advice. The editor printed her letter (but in order to protect her privacy, changed her name from 'Gorilla Queen' to 'Worried in the Royal Castle'). The editor suggested hiring a local hunter to take the little troublemaker out into the woods, kill him, and cut his heart out and bring it back. 'Check page 44 of last month's issue for delicious recipes, at just pennies a serving!' she concluded. — Gregory Maguire

Climate change is the 800-pound gorilla in the living room that the media dances around. But in the scientific community, it's a settled question: 95 percent of scientists believe this is happening with 100 percent confidence temperatures are rising. — Michio Kaku

Wild animals are not meant to be owned, any more than human beings are. Nobody has the right to pass a cougar or a gorilla on from hand to hand. — Pat Derby

When you start to do research into gorillas or any kind of apes, if you're going to play them, that's one of the biggest misconceptions. And when I did Kong, you're not doing gorilla movements, you're not doing ape movements, you're looking for a personality. It's like saying okay I'm going to do human movements. — Andy Serkis

Saving New York City from bankruptcy is like making love to a gorilla. You don't stop when you're tired; you stop when he's tired. — Felix Rohatyn

So Socrates was a kind of gadfly. He was a sort of philosophical urban gorilla hanging around in the middle of Athens, asking these peculiar questions of everybody - important people, young men, slaves - questions that had to do with ultimately what's the life that's worth living. And Plato was one of the young men who hung around him, a very aristocratic young man, came from a very old, important family. — Rebecca Goldstein

Mirror that lies, mirror that lies, that can't be me in the gorilla disguise. — Jimmy Buffett

The theory behind primate experimentation was that these animals were closer biologically to man. In the 1950's, several laboratories even attempted experiments on gorillas, going to great trouble and expense to work with these seemingly most human of animals. However, by 1960 it had been demonstrated that of the apes, the chimpanzee was biochemically more like man than the gorilla. (On the basis of similarity to man, the choice of laboratory animals is often surprising. For example, the hamster is preferred for immunological and cancer studies, since his responses are so similar to man's, while for studies of the heart — Anonymous

At the end of the day, I wanna be a great ... a legend. I've been working hard. — Gorilla Zoe

Wes!" Riley snapped, glaring back at the elevator. "Get out here. The shooting has stopped so you can stop cringing now."
"Oh, well, pardon me for actually having the sense to get out of sight when bullets start flying through the bloody air," Wes snarled back, coming out of the elevator tube. "I don't have scales or armor or the testosterone God gave a gorilla, so you're all going to have to calm your tits until it's safe. — Julie Kagawa

I want a girl who looks good when she wakes up in the morning. We could take her face and dip it in dough and she'll make some nice-face cookies. Some girls wake up, man, you could put their face in dough and you'll get a gorilla cookie, for real! — Flavor Flav

I meditate, and when I do, Prince Harry appears in my subconscious and meditates with me. It's a little strange but I don't think there's anything I can do about it. Sometimes he's not the only one; the other day it was me, Prince Harry, the Dalai Lama, Mr. Rogers, Coco the gorilla, and George Clooney. We were all floating above the earth looking down at the continents as they passed. George Clooney suggested I visit Providence, Rhode Island. The Dalai Lama sighed deeply and said he'd like to visit Tibet.
Poor Dalai Lama. — Kristin Cashore

We found that people, when engaged in a mental sprint, may become effectively blind. The authors of The Invisible Gorilla had made the gorilla "invisible" by keeping the observers intensely busy counting passes. — Daniel Kahneman

Gabriel? Are you implying Gabriel had something to with Thompson's death?" Francesca sounded somewhere between outraged and amused. "You can't be serious, Brice."
"He crushed his hand, Francesca. Your Gabriel did that. Crushed his fist with one hand. I watched him do it and he wasn't even straining. I never even saw him come into the room. He was just there. There's something not quite right about him. His eyes. They aren't human. He's not human."
Francesca stared at him wide-eyed. "Not human? As in what? A phantom? A ghost that flies through the air? A gorilla? What? Maybe he lifts weights. Maybe he's strong because he lifts weights and his adrenaline was pumping. What are you saying? — Christine Feehan

I think a lot guys get laid pretending to be Shaggy 2 Dope because without his paint he's a lot more unrecognizable. He's not a gimpy gorilla like me. — Joseph Bruce

he stopped and eyed Bill Corso
if you choose to just sit here like a bored jungle gorilla, you will have to write out this quote as many times as you can during the next hour. — A.S. King

We used to have a family game, invented by my sister and a friend of hers - it was called 'Agatha's Husbands'. The idea was that they picked out two or at the most three of the most repellent looking strangers in a room, and it was then put to me that i had to choose one of them as a husband, on pain of death or slow torture by the Chinese.
'now then, Agatha, which will you have - the fat young one with pimples, and the scurfy head, or that black one like a gorilla with the bulging eyes?'
'Oh I can't - they're so awful.'
'You must - it's got to be one of them. Or else red hot needles and water torture.'
'Oh dear, then the gorilla. — Agatha Christie

Social Security's not the hard one to solve. Medicare, that is the gorilla in the room, and you've got to put all of it on the table. — Joe Biden

A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. — Steve Breen

We should just get a giant bottle of bargain vodka or something," Gil said, pushing his gorilla mask back on his head.
"Not classy," Steph said. "This is a special night, not a frat party."
"Special? Classy??" Ethan asked. "Steph. We're seniors in high school going trick-or-treating. We look like third-rate street performers. — Sara Zarr

Stupefaction overrode all other emotion when I saw this creature on the lookout, lying in wait for the game. For it was an ape, a large-sized gorilla. It was in vain that I told myself I was losing my reason: I could entertain not the slightest doubt as to his species. But an encounter with a gorilla on the planet Soror was not the essential outlandishness of the situation. This for me lay in the fact that the ape was correctly dressed, like a man of our world, and above all that he wore his clothes in such an easy manner. — Pierre Boulle

I don't know if any genuine, meaningful change could ever result from a song. It's kind of like throwing peanuts at a gorilla. — Tom Waits

My visitors are often surprised when they see the TV Mack put in my domain. They seem to find it odd, the sight of a gorilla staring at tiny humans in a box. Sometimes I wonder, though: Isn't the way they stare at me, sitting in my tiny box, just as strange? — Katherine Applegate

Worrying about a large institution, especially when it has computers, is like worrying about a large gorilla, especially when it's on fire. — Bruce Sterling

But since then you've acted like I was a gorilla at your buffet."
"A ... what?"
"Gorilla at your buffet. You know ... eating all your food? Making you annoyed? That kind of thing? — Brandon Sanderson

A zoologist who observed gorillas in their native habitat was amazed by the uniformity of their life and their vast idleness. Hours and hours without doing anything. Was boredom unknown to them? This is indeed a question raised by a human, a busy ape. Far from fleeing monotony, animals crave it, and what they most dread is to see it end. For it ends, only to be replaced by fear, the cause of all activity. Inaction is divine; yet it is against inaction that man has rebelled. Man alone, in nature, is incapable of enduring monotony, man alone wants something to happen at all costs - something, anything ... Thereby he shows himself unworthy of his ancestor: the need for novelty is the characteristic of an alienated gorilla. — Emil Cioran

When they get a 50-inch waist and a gorilla butt, it's ugly looking - and I think bodybuilding has become ugly looking. — Joe Gold

He has a lower occipital proturbance! — Gorilla Monsoon

Recent discoveries about apes suggest, however, that a gorilla or common chimp stands at least as good a chance being murdered as the average human. — Jared Diamond

My face was burning, and I knew I must look like a gorilla on a greyhound. — Stephenie Meyer

If you hung him for being a good singer, you'd be hanging an innocent man! — Gorilla Monsoon

I am the gorilla who feels his wings growing, a giddy gorilla in the centre of a satin-like emptiness; the night too grows like an electrical plant, shooting white-hot buds into velvet black space. I am the black space of the night in which the buds break with anguish, a starfish swimming on the frozen dew of the moon. I am the germ of a new insanity, a freak dressed in intelligible language, a sob that is buried like a splinter in the quick of the soul. I am dancing the very sane and lovely dance of the angelic gorilla. These are my brothers and sisters who are insane and unangelic. We are dancing in the hollow of the cup of nothingness. We are of one flesh, but separated like stars. — Henry Miller

Change is like dancing with a Gorilla - you can't stop when you are tired. You can only stop when the gorilla is ready to stop. — Stephanie Thompson

I paid a worker at New York's zoo to re-open it just for me and Robin (his wife). When we got to the gorilla cage there was 1 big Silverback gorilla there just bullying all the other gorillas. They were so powerful but their eyes were like an innocent infant. I offered the attendant $10,000 to open the cage and let smash that silverback's snotbox! He declined. — Mike Tyson

Holy hell, Hendrix was going to get eaten by my crotch that had evolved into a man-eating gorilla sometime over the last two years! — Rachel Higginson

You can see the life LITERALLY oozing from his body! — Gorilla Monsoon

The more you learn about the dignity of the gorilla, the more you want to avoid people. — Dian Fossey

So how old are you, baby?" Gorilla asks her.
"Old enough to know better," she says, looking at his arms.
"You like what you see?" he asks and touches her leg. "You and me should do it, later."
"Did you forget to evolve?" she asks, struggling to get off the couch. — Cath Crowley

I feel like I got hit by a bus." "You kind of did," I said, "only it was an angry orc with the strength and attitude of a silverback gorilla. — Elle Casey

I wonder whether those of our political masters who have been put in charge of the defence of the country can distinguish a mortar from a motor; a gun from a howitzer; a guerrilla from a gorilla, although a great many resemble the latter. — Sam Manekshaw

As if Nature had intended to make a gorilla, and had changed its mind at the last moment — P.G. Wodehouse

If I'm talking to someone in a crowded room, I try to make this person feel as though we're the only ones present. I shut out everything else. I look directly at the person. Even if a gorilla were to walk into the room, I probably wouldn't notice it. — Mary Kay Ash

I think what's going on with gorillas is pretty bad. The fact is that you can buy gorilla meat in London any day you want it. — Adam Ant

It is in the stomach of plants that development begins, and ends in the circles of the universe. 'Tis a long scale from the gorilla to the gentleman,
from the gorilla to Plato, Newton, Shakespeare,
to the sanctities of religion, the refinements of legislation, the summit of science, art, and poetry. The beginnings are slow and infirm, but it is an always accelerated march. — Ralph Waldo Emerson

YouTube is still the big gorilla of online video, especially as an archive for work with lasting appeal and as a place where creators can make money from ads sold around their material. But Facebook's ability to use social connections to make content popular quickly, along with changes the social network has made to its news feed to showcase video better, have helped fuel rapid growth in the amount of video viewed on the service over the last year. — Anonymous

Well," she said, "how can I be sure there aren't invisible people in the world? Scientists didn't believe in the mountain gorilla for hundreds of years. And now look. So if scientists can be wrong, then all of us can be wrong. I mean, what if all those invisible people ARE scientists? Think about that one. — Sherman Alexie

I watched the gorilla's eyes again, wise and knowing eyes, and wondered about this business of trying to teach apes language. Our language. Why? There are many members of our own species who live in and with the forest and know it and understand it. We don't listen to them. What is there to suggest we would listen to anything an ape could tell us? Or that it would be able to tell us of its life in a language that hasn't been born of that life? I thought, maybe it is not that they have yet to gain a language, it is that we have lost one. — Douglas Adams

I stood with my arms crossed, scanning the crowd. My eyes hated on a very tall gorilla looking in our direction. He bore a red badge on his furry chest. I had no idea how long we stared at each other, unmoving, before I lifted one hand in a wave.
"Who are you waving at?" Veronica asked me.
"Um, that big monkey. I think he's starting at ... us."
And at that moment, the gorilla lfited an arm and scratched his armpit. The silly gesture filled me with a rush of joy. But I wasn't going to him.
I faced my friends, chewing my thumbnail. Please come over. When I glanced again, he was walking our way. Yes! My pulse went erratic. — Wendy Higgins

The only other animals that would be in the ballpark to be able to do it would be a gorilla, but it's not going to occur to a gorilla to strangle the life out of somebody. They might rip their head off, all right, but it wouldn't occur to a gorilla to just, I'm going to cut off your air. — Quentin Tarantino

The 800 pound gorilla just entered the blogosphere, with Google launching its blog search. — Charlene Li

Did you hear the one about the woman who is attacked on the street by a gorilla, beaten senseless, raped repeatedly, and left to die? When she finally regains consciousness and tries to speak, her doctor leans over to hear her sigh contently and to feebly ask, 'Where is that marvelous ape?' — John McCain

I like when they say a movie is inspired by a true story. That's kind of silly. "Hey, Mitch, did you hear that story about that lady who drove her car into the lake with her kids and they all drowned?" "Yeah, I did, and you know what - that inspires me to write a movie about a gorilla!" — Mitch Hedberg

The man who once famously pronounced "I know words, I have the best words" scorched through the primaries using the vocabulary of a signing gorilla ("China - money - bad!"). — Matt Taibbi

Don't give them niggas no money. It's a post warning. Feed as in food actually means the money. And it's post because I already got the money but once you taste success, you want more success and that's what it is. — Gorilla Zoe

Since the white man says he came from the evolution of animals, well, maybe the black man didn't. The white man has made so many errors in the handling of people that maybe he did come from a gorilla or a fish and crawl up on the sand and then into the trees. Of course, evolution doesn't take God into consideration. I don't think people learned to do all the things they do through evolution. — Charles Mingus

Though there're minor side effects in male adults."
"What side effect?"
She cocked an eyebrow and lowered her voice. "Spontaneous prolonged erection, big guy ... in some test subjects," she added clinically. "A lot of those early tests were done on gorillas ...
"I'm not a gorilla."
She glanced down the front of his lab coat. "Not yet. — Ophelia London

When you're wearing an animal costume and something bad happens, your facial expression doesn't change. The animal is deadpan the whole time. If you're skiing in a gorilla suit and you fall, you just see a gorilla who has no emotion. It's just a stoic gorilla, wildly falling down a hill, out of control. — Demetri Martin

We didn't ever want 'Tarzan' to feel like he was just a man. We didn't want him to stand up straight or wave good-bye. We wanted to make sure he always had that piece of gorilla in him, that he always had an animal attitude about him. — Kevin Lima

Mistletoe." Aunt Trudy pointed at the ceiling above Kate and Zac. "Lay one on her, Zac." Beau's heart gave a hard squeeze as his brother made a big deal of sweeping Kate into his arms, dipping her backward, and laying a loud smooch on her cheek. He heard Aunt Trudy applauding and Jack giggling, but he couldn't tear his eyes off of Zac and Kate. He wanted to rip his brother's hands off of her. He reminded himself that it meant nothing. That Zac was still in love with Lucy. Kate's laughter was still ringing out when Zac brought her upright, embracing her in those gorilla arms of his. Beau gave him a shove. "All right, that's enough," he said in a tone that didn't quite reach playful. Zac cuffed him on the back of the head, his eyes twinkling. — Denise Hunter

Normally a prolonged stare from a gorilla is a threat. But Digit's gaze bore no aggression. He seemed to say: I know. Dian would later write that she believed Digit understood she was sick. — Sy Montgomery

Gorilla, a guy who got his name because he's hairy and because his arms are so long his knuckles scrape the floor. He's grinning and moving closer and she's blocked in on all sides by a mass of bodies. I look at her and him. I look at the window. I think back to our date. She can always break his nose if he gets too friendly. I jump through, land on the grass, and turn around. Who am I kidding? I want to see it if she breaks his nose. — Cath Crowley

Unbelievably, a goldfish can kill a gorilla. However, it does require a substantial element of surprise. — George Carlin

Everybody wants to make better music. — Gorilla Zoe

That was the problem with an eight-figure gorilla of a client. It took all of your time and attention. Old clients dried up and died away. New clients were not cultivated. His complacency had come back to bite him right in the ass. He — David Baldacci

On August 16, 1996, when an eight-year-old female gorilla named Binti Jua helped a three-year-old boy who had fallen eighteen feet into the primate exhibit at Chicago's Brookfield Zoo. Reacting immediately, Binti scooped up the boy and carried him to safety. She sat down on a log in a stream, cradling the boy in her lap, giving him a few gentle back pats before taking him to the waiting zoo staff. This simple act of sympathy, captured on video and shown around the world, touched many hearts, and Binti was hailed as a heroine. It was the first time in U.S. history that an ape figured in the speeches of leading politicians, who held her up as a model of compassion. — Frans De Waal

Another bad cure is the sentence awkwardly stretched out by a "that" or "which" clause. For example, "Leaping from the couch he seized the revolver from the bookshelf that stood behind the armchair," or, "She turned, shrieking, throwing up her arms in terror at the sight of the gorilla that had arrive that morning from Africa, which had formerly been its home." What happens in such sentences, obviously, is that they tend to trail off, lose energy. — John Gardner

Private schools have been attacking public schools and really I was just a pawn in their game. I speak at schools of all ages on a regular basis. — Gorilla Zoe

'Gorilla Man' is a composite of a few individuals, but the song itself was actually inspired by James Taylor. I spied his 'Gorilla' album laying on my floor and in some altered state, instantly started singing the chorus. It was fun to write. There's an old notebook with at least three more verses in it somewhere. — Caitlin Rose

I came face-to-face with a gorilla which was quite good, but it was a 10-hour trek in bad weather, up hills, covered in mud, with mosquitoes everywhere and when we got there the gorilla's just sat there doing nowt. — Karl Pilkington

With man gone, will there be hope for gorilla? — Daniel Quinn