Funny Noon Quotes & Sayings

The doctor seemed especially troubled by the fact of the robbery having been unexpected, and attempted in the night-time; as if it were the established custom of gentlemen in the housebreaking way to transact business at noon, and to make an appointment, by the twopenny post, a day or two previous. — Charles Dickens

How can I have morning sickness when I don't get up till noon? — Rita Rudner

I remember working with Jackie Chan on Shanghai Noon [2000], and when we were working on the script, I thought that my character thought about being an outlaw the way a kid today would think about being a rock star, as a way to impress girls. So it was just kind of a funny idea, but once we had that idea, it changed the character and made it something that was funnier to me to play. — Owen Wilson

The government will pay certain farmers to not grow corn. Wow. Where's my check? That'd be great. "Hey, what do you do for a living?" "Well, I don't grow corn. Get up at the crack of noon, make sure there's no corn growing. I'm gonna get up early tomorrow. And not plow. You know, we used to not grow tomatoes-but there's more money in not growing corn." — Brian Regan

It was a small town: Ferguson, Ohio. When you entered there was a big sign and it said, "Welcome to Ferguson. Beware of the Dog." The all-night drugstore closed at noon. — Jackie Vernon

I finally got up around noon, after having decided that, as far as monogamous relationships go, I could probably do worse than marrying my bed. — Robyn Schneider

If you haven't heard a rumor by noon, make one up. If you're a writer, make sure it's a full page of the book you're currently working on. — Lamont Tanksley

I am the Trolley of Love. Free rides before noon and after 11:58 am! — Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Imagine if you've got the diva of all divas. If we've got to be somewhere at five or six o'clock, I tell her its time to go at noon so she gets those five hours to do what she needs to do. But were both kids at heart. She is the funniest person ever and she has a great sense of humor. We connect at a spiritual level. — Nick Cannon