Funny Easter Quotes & Sayings

Christ has not only spoken to us by his life but has also spoken for us by his death. — Soren Kierkegaard

Two Santa Clauses on the corner. How can you tell the Polish one? The one with the Easter basket. — Henny Youngman

The aim of science is not things themselves, as the dogmatists in their simplicity imagine, but the relation between things. — Henri Poincare

There's no such thing as too much power! — Wolfgang Gullich

God gave the World to Men in Common; But since he gave it them for their benefit, and the greatest Conveniencies of life they were capable to draw from it, it cannot be supposed he meant it should always remain common and uncultivated. He gave it to the use of the industrious and Rational, (and Labour was to be his Title to it;) not to the fancy or covetousness of the quarrelsome and contentious. — John Locke

People really feel the need to share how the series has touched their lives, and that's been very moving. We're enormously grateful to the fans of the show. They've been extremely loyal to us season after season, and they make it all worthwhile. — Roma Downey

Cottontail knocked on the big front door and was admitted to the Palace. There she stood in her funny country clothes but none of the other four Easter Bunnies laughed, for they were wise and kind and knew better. — DuBose Heyward

In my defense, the Easter Bunny is the weakest link in magical lore. I mean, you have to admit that the whole thing is ridiculous. A giant rodent who sneaks into people's homes at night to leave eggs filled with candy? How in the world is that symbolic of the Easter celebration? — Autumn Doughton

My favorite Catholic holiday is Easter. For those of you that don't know, Easter is the day we celebrate Jesus rising from the grave and coming back to Earth as a rabbit that hides colored eggs. — Adam Ferrara

Disaster is rarely as pervasive as it seems from recorded accounts. The fact of being on the record makes it appear continuous and ubiquitous whereas it is more likely to have been sporadic both in time and place. Besides, persistence of the normal is usually greater than the effect of the disturbance, as we know from our own times. After absorbing the news of today, one expects to face a world consisting entirely of strikes, crimes, power failures, broken water mains, stalled trains, school shutdowns, muggers, drug addicts, neo-Nazis, and rapists. The fact is that one can come home in the evening
on a lucky day
without having encountered more than one or two of these phenomena. This has led me to formulate Tuchman's Law, as follows: "The fact of being reported multiplies the apparent extent of any deplorable development by five- to tenfold" (or any figure the reader would care to supply). — Barbara W. Tuchman

As they passed, Duke nodded, and John Matthew, as he was called, did the same - and that was the extent of it. No one had ever heard the SOB say a word, but by the same token, anyone built like that didn't have to talk. — J.R. Ward

I would never have expected anything that I did would ever appear in first-rate museums around the world. That was just a choice that I made, very early on. I was interested mainly in the entertainment arts. I wasn't as interested in being a fine artists. — Rick Heinrichs

The world is not a great place because racist people come with a race type of agenda, and it don't make the world great, it makes it worst than ever. — Werley Nortreus

And swear No where Lives a woman true, and fair. — John Donne

If you do not like Real Estate, all you have to do is make hamburgers, build a business around that hamburger, and franchise it. — Robert Kiyosaki

The rabbit of Easter. He bring of the chocolate. — David Sedaris

It's the Josh Bennett equivalent of tattooing her name across my chest. — Katja Millay

What if the opposite of good wasn't bad? What if the opposite of good was real? — Claire Dederer

How often do I lull my seething blood to rest, for you have never seen anything so unsteady, so uncertain, as this heart. — Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

Stop hiding condoms in my stuff. It's like some twisted Easter egg hunt in there. — Alyxandra Harvey