Funny Christmas One Liners Quotes & Sayings

But I've mellowed over time, which is what all wine drunks and dope smokers say when trying to justify why they quit trying. — Chuck Klosterman

Christmas is a fun theme for a courtroom tale, because like that "Miracle on 34th Street", strange things have been known to happen when Christmas and the law come face to face. — Landis Wade

I don't care that we're not guaranteed tomorrow. I'll promise you forever, every day of your forever." The — Regina Bartley

The ladies, who had condoled so thoroughly with her during her time of grief, found it rather more difficult to participate in her happiness, which takes a true and proper friend indeed. — Jo Baker

In this world of change naught which comes stays and naught which goes is lost. — Sophie Swetchine

We were wavering around like a ship without a sail. — Judy Holliday

Just so you know, the authors lie when they say it tastes sweet and salty. I will tell you the truth, it is slimy, gooey and thick. Yes, thick. Gross, but I did it for Jake, my husband, the love of my life. — Victoria Andrews

In my state, over 17,000 households are going hungry on a regular basis. — Patrick J. Kennedy