Funny Barbara Evans Quotes & Sayings

Sexual intercourse is a grossly overrated pastime; the position is undignified, the pleasure momentary and the consequences damnable. — Lord Chesterfield

Hey, Axi. What's the difference between a doctor and a lawyer?" I knew this joke - it was one of Robinson's standards. And I was only half-surprised he was trotting it out now. Playing along, I said, "I don't know. What?" "A lawyer will rob you; a doctor will rob you and kill you, too. — James Patterson

Don't become a jerk. Don't get lazy. Don't get entitled. — Jon Acuff

What if the water that came out of the shower was treated with a chemical that responded to a combination of things, like your heartbeat and your body temperature and your brainwaves, so that your skin changed color according to mood? If you were extremely excited your skin would turn green, and if you we're angry you'd turn red, obviously, and if you felt like shiitake you'd turn brown and if you we're blue you'd turn blue.
Everyone could know what everyone else felt and we could be more careful with each other, because you'd never want to tell someone who skin was purple that you're angry at her for being late, just like you'd want to pat a pink person on the back and say, Congratulations! — Jonathan Safran Foer

No one has really ever defined what a friend is. — Joseph Epstein