Funny Asf Quotes & Sayings

It's Curt Schilling and his bloody sock staring down the Yankees in the Bronx. It's Derek Lowe taking the mound the very next night to complete the most improbable comeback in baseball history - and then seven days later clinching the World Series. It's Pedro Martinez and his six hitless innings of postseason relief against the Indians. Yes, it is also Cy Young and Roger Clemens, and the 192 wins in a Red Sox uniform that they share - the perfect game for Young, the 20 strikeout games for Clemens - but it is also Bill Dinneen clinching the 1903 World Series with a busted, bloody hand, and Jose Santiago shutting down Minnesota with two games left in the season to keep the 1967 Impossible Dream alive, and Jim Lonborg clinching the Impossible Dream the very next day, and Jim Lonborg again, tossing a one-hitter and a three-hitter in the 1967 World Series, and Luis Tiant in the 1975 postseason, shutting out Oakland and Cincinnati in back-to-back starts. They are all winners. — Tucker Elliot

Just because someone thinks he is being attacked by the media doesn't mean he is. Many times the media actually is being fair, and they're attacking for good reason. — Roger Ailes

Illinois then had no legislation providing compensation for accident or disease caused by occupation. — Alice Hamilton

It's like a Master Class in Acting for three hours. I go to work and I learn so much and do so much. I'm privileged. I'm privileged to be on stage with them. That's all I can say. They're extremely generous. There are no egos in the room at all. — Sean Mahon

Epic fails are just dramatic pauses to build up intensity of epic awesomeness emerging. — Janna Cachola

We've been given a warning by science, and a wake-up call by nature; it is up to us now to heed them. — Bill McKibben

It is great wealth to a soul to live frugally with a contented mind. — Lucretius

Optimism is an alienated form of faith, pessimism an alienated form of despair. — Erich Fromm

We remain at peace with all nations, and no efforts on my part consistent with the preservation of our rights and the honor of the country shall be spared to maintain a position so consonant to our institutions. — Martin Van Buren

Maybe there weren't any grown-ups, only people who had worked hard and also got lucky and were slightly out of their depth, all of us doing the best job we could, which is all we can really hope for. — Neil Gaiman

Any ninny with an honest heart, a scheming family, and an open purse can do that. — Philippa Gregory

The basis of art is change in the universe. — Robert Hass

It is impossible to exaggerate the evil work theology has done in the world. — Lydia M. Child