Funny 55 Birthday Quotes & Sayings

You better ignore this.
You better staple your eyes shut
and put pot-lids over your ears
and pinch your nose with vice grips
and cement your mouth shut
with real cement and while
you're at it or in it or whatever
cut off your hands for good measure — B.J. Ward

Life took you right to the edge of where you wanted to go, then turned left. — Lisa Samson

You're beautiful," Archer murmured, his husky voice rolling over my skin. He reached up with his other hand to touch the blue streak in my hair. "You're like a creature from some exotic land that no one has discovered yet. — Nina Lane

Don't let your background or commitment to your own tradition make you fearful of joining in the adventure the Holy Spirit prepares for you. — Wesley Hill

History is the enactment of ritual on a permanent and universal stage; and its perpetual commemoration. — Norman O. Brown

If kissing was a language I was sure we'd know it well. If it could measure the amount of love you felt for someone, our love was infinite after all. Even when we hugged I felt a special connection to him. It was in his loving embrace that I sought solace, where I found it, and where I would keep it. Our love was enchanting and magical, secretive and special. Overall, though, it was ours and we would treasure it. — Nadege Richards

Girls would say: "I have a boyfriend for that." So in addition to putting their pleasure literally into someone else's hands - an inept teenage boy - these are the same girls who say they do not climax with a partner. It's the opposite with boys; they say because they can do that themselves, girls should perform oral sex. — Peggy Orenstein

It's a tribute to the human brain that anyone is able to function out there on television in a talk situation that is entirely artificial. — Dick Cavett

I think they have compatible silences. — David Levithan

No one has success until he has the abounding life. This is made up of the many-fold activity of energy, enthusiasm and gladness. It is to spring to meet the day with a thrill at being alive. It is to go forth to meet the morning in an ecstasy of joy. It is to realize the oneness of humanity. — Lilian Whiting

I think a good relationship is about collaboration. — Jennifer Aniston