Flirting Humor Quotes & Sayings

DTH, as in direct to home?" she asked the question i had prepared my answer for.
"No DTH here is direct to heart," i said, hoping she would laugh this time. — Sumrit Shahi

I'm half Italian."
"Which half?" the words were out before Tessa could stop them. Was she flirting with him? She never flirted with men.
His lips curved in a slow, sexy smile that made her heart trip. "From the waist down. — Pamela Clare

I wonder what it was really like back then. We think it's all fun and flirting, but there was probably a lot of ugly reality."
"Like the dancing. — Mary Jane Hathaway

I stopped at a red light, turned my head, and allowed myself to enjoy the handsomeness that was Brent.
He noticed my staring and asked, "What?"
"As if you don't know. You're not the type of guy that a girl gets tired of looking at."
"Oh. Well in that case, you're welcome to look all you want," he said and gestured to himself. "You're allowed to touch, too." He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.
I lowered my voice into its sexy-husky range. "I was hoping you'd say that." With my flirtiest look on my face, I rubbed my hand slowly up his arm and then pinched him firmly on the shoulder.
"Ow!" Brent rubbed his shoulder and grinned. "Not what I had in mind! — Lani Woodland

Not that she wasn't hot - she was super, mega, hot - but not.. approachable. Like, not even the Rock would dare to whistle at her, if you know what I mean. — Stephenie Meyer

You know, Miss Holly, you look very dramatic like that, backlit by the fire. Very attractive, if I may say so. I know you shared a moment passionne with Artemis which he subsequently fouled up with his typical boorish behavior. Let me just throw something out there for you to consider while we're chasing the probe: I share Artemis's passion but not his boorishness. No pressure; just think about it.
This was enough to elicit a deafening moment of silence even in the middle of a crisis, which Orion seemed to be blissfully unaffected by. — Eoin Colfer

Any chance I'd get to see you in that bikini?"
Zahara punched him in the arm. "No more talk of me in anything remotely skimpy or I'm gonna drop-kick you, got it?" ~Zahara and Bryan — Annabell Cadiz

Go play your games with Jim. I'll find you both when I need you."
Arrogant asshole. "I tell you what, if you find us before those three days run out, I'll cook you a damn dinner and serve it to you naked."
"Is that a promise?"
"Yes. Go fuck yourself. — Ilona Andrews

Flirting is a "controversial art form" that leaves the intended either flattered, infatuated, creeped out or getting a restraining order. — Shannon L. Alder

Alice doesn't seem to mind because she's laughing too, and biting her lip, all doe-eyed, and tossing her freshly washed hair, and Norton tosses his lovely, glossy hair back, and she tosses her hair in return, and he tosses his, and she tosses hers, and it;s like some mating ritual on a wildlife program. — David Nicholls

Could you bring me to Rita's house before we go to the airport?" I ask. "There's one last thing I need to ask her to do." "That is on the other side of the river," says Ethan."I know. But I need to see her. Please, I'll be eternally grateful." He doesn't say anything, but instead puts the car in gear and starts the engine. After we are driving for about two minutes he asks. "How grateful?" Ah, I see the old Ethan hasn't disappeared then. I smile and lean over to place a light peck on his cheek. "This grateful," I say to him."Hmm, I think you can do better than that," he chides in good humor.
"You're driving," is all I say in reply.
"I can pull over," he answers smartly. — L. H. Cosway

What if I shave?" he said. "I look much better when I'm shaved. My cousin will vouch for that - do I not look almost handsome when I shave, Edward? " He didn't wait for the duke's reply but turned earnestly back to Prudence. "Do you think you could marry me if I shaved? — Anne Gracie

Huh? Oh you have a hidden agenda, do you?" She laughed. His straight-faced humor always surprised her. "You promised me you didn't."
"There is nothing hidden about it," he replied. My objective is obvious. I've decided I'd rather have you describe me as 'sweet' than a 'slagging pain in the tailset.'"
"Really?"
"Well ... " he looked up from the bag. "Maybe not in public."
"I might be able to confine myself to saying it in private, if you gave me a reason." Taya met his eyes, and he blushed. — Dru Pagliassotti

Now, Mr. Shaughnessy, remember what happened the last time your wife got jealous of your flirting? She exchanged your denture cream for hemorrhoidal ointment. — Leslie Kelly

While Owen and Miles talk sports, I people watch. And this is what I see: teenagers trying to act like adults. Or how they think adults act. But mostly they look ridiculous, and I wonder what they don't want to do something that's more fun than drinking, smoking, flirting, and making out. Why are those activities considered to be fun? — Melody Carlson

Okay," I said. "Just a normal afternoon and two normal people."
She nodded. "And so ... hypothetically, if these to people likes each other, what would it take to get the stupid guy to kiss the girl, huh?"
"Oh ... " I felt like one of Apollo's sacred cows-slow, dumb, and bright red. "Um ... — Rick Riordan

You drink milk out of the carton while in your underwear?" Alex laughed.
"You've never done that? Gotten up in the middle of the night and wanted a snack?"
"Yes, but I wouldn't bother to put on my underwear."
He watched my face as his words sank in.
"What do you ... oh." I frowned. "Wouldn't that be cold? — Nichole Chase

Lori sat way back in her chair and gave him the once-over. What in the world's gotten into Ben Lawson? jokes? Flirting? Maybe I should sleep with Molly. I think she's got a magic hooha. — Victoria Dahl

Sex, a switchblade, and motorcycle lessons. You really are making sure my night ends on a high note. — Kelley Armstrong

Carl: Do I happen to see a twinkle in your eye, or do you always look so fantastic Lis?

Lis: Carl dear, the twinkle in my eye is reserved for my husband and children, When are you going to accept that?

Carl: I'll accept it the day the light vanishes and eternal darkness swallows me up along with the rest of the earth. — Jussi Adler-Olsen

I'm stuck babysitting turtle eggs while a volleyball player slash grease monkey slash aquarium volunteer tries to hit on me."
I'm not hitting on you," he protested.
No?"
Believe me, you'd know if I was hitting on you. You wouldn't be able to stop yourself from succumbing to my charms. — Nicholas Sparks

I texted Kaidan, who was listed in my contacts under "James," for James Bond. He'd chosen it. He had me listed as "Hot Chick From Gig."
Video chat in 30.
His immediate response made me shake my head.
Clothing optional?
It was nice to know he could keep a sense of humor in the face of calamity. Or maybe he wasn't joking ...
"Are you two flirting?" Patti asked, her eyes darting to me from the road.
I blushed and deleted his message. — Wendy Higgins

But just for the sake of argument, let's say I am cornered. Or perhaps I am in the middle of a crowded ballroom and do not want to make a scene. If you were flirting with a young lady who had just told you not to call her sweetheart, what would you do?"
"I would accede to her wishes and bid her good night," he said starchily.
"You would not!" Henry accused with a playful smile. "You're a terrible rake, Dunford. Belle told me."
"Belle talks too much," he muttered. — Julia Quinn

She jotted down the order, then forced herself to meet his gaze. "It's going to be a bit of a wait, we're short-staffed this morning." The following words rushed out of her. "And breakfast's on me."
"Normally, I wouldn't protest," he said, leaning closer. "But in public, I'd prefer a plate."
An image of Rukh, hair untied, licking whipped cream off her navel flashed through her mind, left her staring. — Mina Khan

I'm just a simple guy. I love beer, sex, and hockey. I hate liars, Sting, and art that doesn't have people in it. - Luke Almeida — Kate Meader

My mother was tickled and I think kind of proud when my father got hit on my an attractive middle-aged Asian lady who hadn't noticed he was with his family. He was certainly pleased about it. — Craig Ferguson

I don't know if anyone's ever told you this", he begins. He doesn't blush, and his eyes don't dart away. Instead I find myself staring into a pair of oceans - one perfect, the other blemished by that tiny ripple. "You're very attractive."
I've been complimented on my appearance before. But never in his tone of voice. Of all the things he's said, I don't know why this catches me off guard. But it startles me so much that without thinking I blurt out, "I could say the same about you." I pause. "In case you didn't know."
A slow grin spreads across his face. "Oh, trust me. I know. — Marie Lu

You guys are ridiculous," he says, retreating back to the kitchen.
"Your flirting just scared the hell out of me."
"Scared the hell out of me too. — Pittacus Lore

Coquetry is the essential characteristic, and the prevalent humor of women; but they do not all practice it, because the coquetry of some is restrained by fear or by reason. — Francois De La Rochefoucauld

There you are!" he shouted at them. "Father has half the castle turned
out looking for you."
"Us?" Hadrian asked.
"Yes." Fanen nodded. "He wants to see the two thieves in his chambers
right away."
"You didn't steal the silver or anything, did you, Royce?" Hadrian
asked.
"I would bet it has more to do with your flirting with Lenare this afternoon
and threatening Mauvin just to show off," Royce retorted.
"That was your fault," Hadrian said, jabbing his finger at him. — Michael J. Sullivan

I've never said this to a girl before."
I bit my lip, waiting.
"Well ... " He looked down. "I'm not sure how to say this." He took a deep breath and announced, "I really like fighting evil with you. — Joan Bauer

Flirting with love can do that."

Vega wasn't ready to admit to such a problematic emotion. — Dorothy McFalls

When she looked at him with those dark eyes, Nassar felt the urge to say something intelligent and deeply impressive. Unfortunately, nothing of the kind came to mind. — Ilona Andrews

Tiring of his questioning, I tell him adamantly that nothing's ever going to happen between Kahn and I.
"But you want it to."
"It doesn't matter what I want. It's never gonna happen."
"Does he know that you wear ballet shoes to bed?"
"I do NOT-"
He laughed, "That you're GAY-"
"Oh. Yeah- he knows THAT."
He asks if Kahn is okay with me being gay.
"HE LOVES IT."
"LOVES THAT YOU'RE GAY?"
"YEAH."
"Sounds PROMISING."
"That's what I thought. But Nadda."
"Nadda... YET. — Giorge Leedy

I'm currently imagining a few creative ways of causing you extraordinary amounts of pain."
Kingsley raised his chin. Mere inches separated their faces.
"Stop flirting. You know we don't have time for that. — Tiffany Reisz

Here's the deal: no touching, no hand-holding, no flirting, no sexy talk, no dancing, and absolutely no kissy face."

"You didn't mention no sex, did you? I might have you on a technicality."


"You and me alone, eating, talking, maybe even having a good time. Yeah, it might be a date."


"I've seen what's in your pantry, and I respect my arteries too much to indulge."

"That's the thing about snakes - even if they're harmless, they look like such badasses it doesn't really matter."

"You're lying. You're really wearing a pair of granny panties. — Wendy Byrne

Do you want your scarf back?' I asked.
'No, just the girl who goes with it.'
Oh my gosh, that guy knows his lines. — Robin Brande

You want me to be your spy in a game of restaurant espionage? Will I need a code name?"
"It's nothing morally reprehensible or anything, " Wes hastened to assure her. "Just curiosity."
"I think your code name should be Tiberius," she said decisively. "I'll be Uhura."
"Tiberius? As in James Tiberius Kirk?" Wes blinked, then grinned. "Oh my God, this is your version of flirting. How do you say 'I fancy you' in Klingon? — Louisa Edwards

I'm gonna take a nap, Heaven," he said, wanting away from her to clear his head. He didn't like feeling uncomfortable in his house.
"Haven," she corrected him as he started to walk away.
"I know," he said. "I kinda like Heaven though."
She turned to him, and their eyes met for the first time since he'd walked into the room. "Me, too. — J.M. Darhower

I want to see the front of you."
"That's what all the girls say."
"Do you expect me to roll you over? 'Cuz I will."
"Your mate's not going to like this."
"As if that's going to bother you?"
"True. It actually makes it worth the effort."
With a groan, he shoved his palms into the shimmering silver pool of blood beneath him, and flopped over like the side of beef he was.
"Wow," she breathed.
"I know, right? Hung like a horse."
"If you're really nice - and you live through this - I'll promise not to tell V."
"About my size."
She laughed a little. "No, that you assumed I'd look at you in any fashion other than professionally. — J.R. Ward

Oh well ... I'd just been thinking, if you had died, you'd have been welcome to share my toilet. — J.K. Rowling

Husband?"
"Aye. Husband."
"The slow-witted one that's been following you? I thought he
was your servant. — G.A. Aiken

Gotta be more specific sunshine." He winked at me before starting another.
"You might want to get that eye problem checked out. One might mistaken it for flirting. — K.R. Grace