Fat Loss Funny Quotes & Sayings

Conan O'Brien has talked about how comedians try to emulate their heroes, fall short, and end up doing their own thing. Johnny Carson tried to be Jack Benny but ended up Johnny Carson. David Letterman tried to copy Johnny Carson but ended up David Letterman. And Conan O'Brien tried to be David Letterman but ended up Conan O'Brien. In O'Brien's words, "It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique." Thank goodness. — Austin Kleon

People tell me, 'Bill, let it go. The Kennedy assassination was years ago. It was just the assassination of a President and the hijacking of our government by a totalitarian regime - who cares? Just let it go.' I say, 'All right then. That whole Jesus thing? Let it go! It was 2,000 years ago! Who cares?' — Bill Hicks

Keep an open mind, but as they say, not so open your brain falls out. — Melissa Tiers

I think that as a teenager in England, it's very hard to avoid Europe. You see Barcelona, and you see all those places as a youngster. You go there on school trips and everything, but America is like a different planet. — Simon Taylor-Davis

Unless the chemist learns the language of mathematics, he will become a provincial and the higher branches of chemical work, that require reason as well as skill, will gradually pass out of his hands. — Alexander Crum Brown

Determine to become one of the best. Sufficient money will almost automatically follow if you get to be one of the 'best' in your chosen field, whatever it is. — Donald G. Mitchell

For every negative that is a disappointment, there is one that is a joy. — Edward S. Curtis

Welcome to the end of the world, it said. Not with a bang, but a whimper. — Anonymous

Whatever power of the earth rampages, we turn to it dazed but anonymous eyes; whatever the name of the catastrophe, it is never the opposite of love. — Mary Oliver

Our level of love or our level of fear determines the state of our reality. — Stephen Richards

Very romantic," said Lillian, her voice now like the sound of snapping dry bones in her bare hands. "A middle-aged Romeo, and a Juliet who wants a divorce. — Sarah Rees Brennan

Every seven years, I sit down and make a whole new plan. — Dolly Parton

Because of social strictures against even the mildest swearing, America developed a particularly rich crop of euphemistic expletives - darn, durn, goldurn, goshdad, goshdang, goshawful, blast, consarn, confound, by Jove, by jingo, great guns, by the great horn spoon (a nonce term first cited in the Biglow Papers), jo-fired, jumping Jehoshaphat, and others almost without number - but even this cautious epithets could land people in trouble as late as the 1940s. — Bill Bryson

Kids look up to me, and it's really incredible to be in that position. — Corbin Bleu