Erm Quotes & Sayings

CHILD: Mummy, who was Hitler? MOTHER: Hitler? CHILD: Yeah. Who was he? MOTHER: Erm, he was a very bad man from a long time ago. CHILD: Oh. How bad? MOTHER: He was like ... he was like Voldemort. CHILD: Oh! That's really, really bad. Mother: Yes. CHILD: (Pause) So, did Harry Potter kill Hitler, too? — Jen Campbell

And you are?'
'Erm . . Professor N'gomo.' said Edith waving her badge in what she supposed was a casual way. — Anna Moore

(About Pop Idols) Obviously, it's designed by record company executives who want a cheap success, and they don't want to give money to anybody and they don't want to give contracts, so they've created this world of very bubbly teenagers who want to be "idols" and they think all they have to do is mime quite well and they've made it ... But it's not the problem of the kids, it's the problem of the record companies, because it's just an inexpensive way for them to have so-called, I won't say "artists", but erm ... You're nodding, you know what I mean. — Steven Morrissey

We try to ... we are, I suppose to a certain extent all affected and erm, that is both funny and sad I think. — Tony Hancock

And erm, perhaps looking like this it was perhaps the only thing I could do. — Tony Hancock

Erm, I don't really have any regrets. — Bobby Farrelly

William asked Diana if she'd seen the portrait of the Queen in yesterday's papers. "Her hands looked like she'd been in the garden all day; they were all big and dirty," he laughed. Diana giggled instinctively, then stopped herself. "William, please, don't say that."
"Sorry, Mummy, but it's true: Granny did look really funny."
Granny. How odd it sounded.
"Can I have some wine, Mummy?"
"No, William! Whatever are you thinking?"
"But Mummy, I drink it all the time."
"Erm, no, you don't actually, and, well, you can't have any."
"Yes, I can," he replied with a mischievous but determined grin.
And he did. A small but interesting piece of power play to observe. William knew what he wanted, and Diana was a soft touch with her boys.
- Piers Morgan — Larry King

When I get asked, 'what are the differences between Twilight and THG' I'm like, 'Erm, what are the similarities?' — Jennifer Lawrence

GYBE are among my, erm, two favourite Montreal bands, Arcade Fire being the other. — David Bowie

As for my brothers,' Zeus said, 'we are thankful -' he cleared his throat, like the words were hard to get out - 'erm, thankful for the aid of Hades.'
The Lord of the Dead nodded. He had a smug look on his face, but I figure he'd earned the right. He patted his son Nico on the shoulders, and Nico looked happier than I'd ever seen him. — Rick Riordan

The euro is a hybrid of a fixed exchange-rate regime, like the 1980s ERM or the 1930s gold standard, and a state currency. — Yanis Varoufakis

And what do you like to do, little man?" "I like-books," James had said. While standing in the bookshop, with a parcel of books under his arm. The lady had given him a pitying look. "I read-erm-rather a lot," James went on, dreary master of the obvious. King of the obvious. Emperor of the obvious. — Cassandra Clare

Speaking of cupcakes, Will wants two dozen off your special menu to take on the road after the wedding."
"The, erm, peach kind?"
"The peach kind," Lindsey said.
"I like the peach kind," Josh said.
Mikey had named them Sex on a Peach. And they were Kimmie's second biggest seller, after the Hairy Dicks, which were coconut cake balls strategically placed with Dahlia's chocolate-covered, ice cream-filled bananas.
And Josh's frown had disappeared, and now he was grinning as if he knew it.
All of it. — Jamie Farrell

Enterprise Risk Management (ERM) involves viewing risk holistically and horizontally across an organization. Both insurable and non-insurable risks are identified across all facets and disciplines of an entity, with the objective to eliminate, ameliorate or transfer such risks - or prepare to accept them. — Al Decker

She nods. "We have five knives, two guns, and a big hole."
I look up into her innocent blue eyes and try not to smile. "Erm, okay."
"If you do anything bad, I will shoot you and put you in the hole."
Aah. Now I see why she was rattling off the inventory. — Beckie Stevenson

We do have a saying in America: if you're in a hole, stop digging ... erm, I'm not sure I should have said that. — Donald Rumsfeld

Things will get really screwed up, right?"
"Erm ... maybe."
"Maybe, like how?"
"Ever wanted to go sledding in the Mojave Desert? — Julie Kagawa

We need to be able to control - erm, guide the masses that can't help control themselves. — Brad McKinniss

If you must know where I was this morning,' Shelby said, 'Professor Pike never misses breakfast and I was just taking advantage of that fact to . . . erm . . . visit his office.' She produced a sheet of folded paper from the pocket of her black uniform jumpsuit. 'I know his memory's probably not that great these days, but he really shouldn't just write his master server access passwords down like that.'

'And he just left that lying around, did he?' Wing asked with a slight frown.

'Yeah, just lying around . . . in his safe,' Shelby said with a mischievous smile, 'but if you're going to rely on such basic security you're really asking for this kind of thing to happen. — Mark Walden

On the phone
Bookseller: Hello Ripping Yarns.
Customer: Do you have any mohair wool?
Bookseller: Sorry, we're not a yarns shop, we're a bookshop.
Customer: You're called Ripping Yarns.
Bookseller: Yes, that's 'yarns' as in stories.
Customer: Well it's a stupid name.
Bookseller: It's a Monty Python reference.
Customer: So you don't sell wool?
Bookseller: No.
Customer: Hmf. Ridiculous.
Bookseller: ... but we do sell dead parrots.
Customer: What?
Bookseller: Parrots. Dead. Extinct. Expired. Would you like one?
Customer: Erm, no.
Bookseller: Ok, well if you change your mind, do call back. — Jen Campbell

People sort of imagine Chris Morris and me sitting somewhere dark, with dripping taps and chilling background music. In fact, we like to sit on his roof in the sunshine - and there's an endless amount of just sitting there, going, 'So, erm, er, what shall we do?' — Peter Baynham

The name came from, erm ... us all just agreeing on a name that we liked. There was talk of Swans at first, but there was already a band called Swans, way back in the eighties. An American band. So we thought, well, we can't have them, and I think Andy said, "well what about Doves?" We ruminated it around the three of us and went, well, it's not so bad, it's all right. — Jimi Goodwin

You could knock," Trey said. Brian paused in the bedroom's doorway holding his towel around his waist. Standing before the long dresser, Trey wrapped his arms around the thin young man in front of him and plastered his body to the guy's back. Trey's hand slid up under the hem of his new friend's T-shirt. The guy's eyes widened and he caught Trey's hands in his. "H-hey, Master Sinclair, erm, Brian. Can I call you Brian?" Brian shrugged and the guy flushed. "This isn't what it looks like. I don't like guys or anything." He shook his head vigorously. "You will," Trey murmured, inching the guy's shirt further up his belly. "Trey, are you molesting virgins again?" Brian grinned at his best friend's delight with his latest conquest. — Olivia Cunning

Georgeta paused by the door and turned around to look at the boys. "Keep in mind there are humans around. Don't show off with your physical strength, like you did last time."
"It was an accident - " Erik tried to protest.
"An accident? You bent the basketball hoop with one hand."
"Erm." Erik sheepishly looked at Bogdan for reassurance, but Bogdan didn't comment, just chuckled. — A.O. Peart

I looked at Judith. "This sounds strange, but I don't suppose you saw three mad women with a cauldron of boiling tea pass by this way?"
"No," she replied. The polite voice of reasonable people scared of exciting the madman.
"Flash of light? Puff of smoke? Erm ... " I tried to find a polite way of describing the symptoms of spontaneous teleportation without using the dreaded "teleportation" word. I failed. I slumped back into the sand. What kind of mystic kept a spatial vortex at the bottom of their cauldrons of tea anyway? — Kate Griffin

Okay, well, on Borelletrox V, the males are kept completely isolated from all images of the female until Binding Day and the females are, erm, let's just say they've' got a lot of-- — Jackson Lanzing

Loads of weirdos send me things, like strange bits of leather. And then there was the guy who thought I was having his baby. Apparently, he's been writing to Princess Anne too, so I clearly belong to a good, erm, sub-section of society. — Konnie Huq

Of, course it always cheers a news editor when a story has what we describe as 'legs' therefore it, erm, runs. — Kamal Ahmed

Good evening," said Ronan. "Students, are you? And do you learn much, up at the school?"
"Erm -"
"A bit," said Hermione timidly.
"A bit. Well, that's something." Ronan sighed. — J.K. Rowling

Good one," said Ron, copying it down. "Because of . . . erm . . . Mercury. Why don't you get stabbed in the back by someone you thought was a friend?" "Yeah . . . cool . . ." said Harry, scribbling it down, "because . . . Venus is in the twelfth house. — J.K. Rowling

Erm.. dear, do I ride out for Apocalypses?' Mrs War took the lid off the saucepan and prodded viciously at something inside. 'No, dear,' she said firmly. 'You always come down with a cold. — Terry Pratchett