Embletonia Quotes & Sayings

I have never been much of a groomer. I take baths a lot, but I don't wear deodorant. I don't have to. I have a miraculous body scent. I've had women smell me and say that should be bottled. I would advise guys to lay off the Drakkar, because the cavemen weren't wearing it. They might have been putting mint leaves on their balls, but [your scent] is grown naturally. I have really good dating advice. — Zach Galifianakis

Friendship is two souls inhabiting one body. — Aristotle.

There it sat, perfect as a fresh-laid egg on the dead sea bottom, the only nucleus of light and warmth in hundreds of miles of lonely wasteland. It was like a heart beating alone in a great dark body. He felt almost sorrowful with pride, gazing at it with wet eyes. — Ray Bradbury

The odds against there being a bomb on a plane are a million to one, and against two bombs a million times a million to one. Next time you fly, cut the odds and take a bomb. — Benny Hill

Mr. Bazzard's father, being a Norfolk farmer, would have furiously laid about him with a flail, a pitch-fork, and every agricultural implement available for assaulting purposes, on the slightest hint of his son's having written a play. — Charles Dickens

Marriage is honourable, as you say; and if so, wherefore should Cuckoldom be a Discredit, being deriv'd from so honourable a Root? — William Congreve

God enjoins you to treat women well, for they are your mothers, daughters, aunts. — Anonymous

Holy books are an insult to a God with good intentions. — Dejan Stojanovic

A serious prophet upon predicting a flood should be the first man to climb a tree. This would demonstrate that he was indeed a seer. — Stephen Crane

I make all my body lotions by just mixing oils. — Nikki Reed