Duff Kody Keplinger Quotes & Sayings

The point is, scientists have proven that every group of friends has a weak link, a DUFF. And girls respond well to guys who associate with their DUFFs."
"Crackheads can call themselves scientists now? That's news to me. — Kody Keplinger

P.s.: I know you're rolling your eyes right now, but I don't care. Honestly, it's always kind of been a turn on. — Kody Keplinger

I hated Valentine's Day even before I was aware of my Duff status. Honestly, I didn't even understand why it was a holiday. Really, it was just an excuse for girls to whine about being lonely and for guys to worm their way into getting laid. I found it materialistic, indulgent, and, with all of the chocolate, completely unhealthy. — Kody Keplinger

" ... we're all fucking Duffs."
(Designated Ugly Fat Friend)
"I'm not the Duff," Wesley said confidently.
"That's because you don't have friends." (Bianca)
"Oh. Right." — Kody Keplinger

I shook my head. "Don't bother making excuses," I said. "Don't waste your time because, the fact is, I am the Duff. But so is everyone else in the world. We're all fucking Duffs."
"I'm not the Duff," Wesley said confidently.
"That's because you don't have friends."
"Oh. Right. — Kody Keplinger

If Kate Winslet had been the Duff, Leonardo DiCaprio wouldn't have been after her in Titanic and that could have saved all of us a lot of tears. — Kody Keplinger

I am the Duff. But so is everyone else in the world. We're all fucking Duffs. — Kody Keplinger

Bianca, can I ask you something?" "No," I said quickly. "I am not giving you a blow job. No fucking way. Just the thought of it is disgusting and degrading and ... No. Never." "While that's a little disappointing," Wesley said, "it's not what I was planning to ask you."
Keplinger, Kody (2010-09-07). The DUFF: (Designated Ugly Fat Friend) (p. 166). Little, Brown Books for Young Readers. Kindle Edition. — Kody Keplinger

I was the Duff. And that was a good thing. Because anyone who didn't feel like the Duff must not have friends. Every girl feels unattractive sometimes. Why had it taken me so long to figure that out? Why had I been stressing over that dumb word for so long when it was so simple? I should be proud to be the Duff. Proud to have great friends who, in their minds, were my Duffs. — Kody Keplinger