Dog Couch Quotes & Sayings

It used to be on the Internet no one knew you were a dog. Now not only does
everyone know that you are a dog, they know what kind of a dog you are, who
you run with, where you hide your bones, the accidental piddle behind the
couch, the fight you got into with the boxer, and your thoughts on the hot
poodle down the street. — Nancy Willard

Dogs: the best friend you will ever have that pees on your couch and stays your friend. — Dana Gould

The German sociologist Niklas Luhmann once observed that the simple act of asking yourself, "Where did I put my keys?" performs unexpected magic: it transforms the world into a catalog of possible key locations.1 Under the couch, somewhere the dog or the baby moved — Ian Bogost

I read everywhere. I read every day. I read on the couch with my dog in the afternoon and at night. I try to read at least two to three hours a day. I read only fiction. — R.L. Stine

The loss of ... honest and industrious men's lives cannot be valued at any price. — William Bradford

Faith!" Tracy called. "Your dog's got serious identity issues."...
"Hey!" she said, picking Humperdinck up in her arms.
"How'd you do at Tracy's"
"He mounted the damn cat." Tracy set the travel kennel beside the couch. "You're going to have Siamese Yorkies if you don't do something about him. — Kristin Miller

Many writers claim that nearly all crime is caused by economic conditions, or in other words that poverty is practically the whole cause of crime. Endless statistics have been gathered on this subject which seem to show conclusively that property crimes are largely the result of the unequal distribution of wealth. But crime of any class cannot be safely ascribed to a single cause. Life is too complex, heredity is too variant and imperfect, too many separate things contribute to human behavior, to make it possible to trace all actions to a single cause. — Clarence Darrow

Now, I learned a long time ago how to be quiet on the outside while I'm freaking on the inside. How to turn away like I don't see all the things that need to be seen, just to keep peace. How to lie low and act like I want nothing, expect nothing, and hope for nothing so I don't become more trouble than I'm worth. I'm five months short of eighteen and I know how to be cursed and ignored and left behind, how to swallow a thousand tears and ignore a thousand delibarate cruelties, but it's two in the morning on New Year's Eve and I'm mad and scared and bone tired and really, really sick of acting like I'm grateful to be staying on a hairy, sagging, dog-stained couch in a junky, mildewed trailer with a fat, dangerous, volatile drunk who sweats stale beer and wallows in his own wastewater, and who doesn't think there's one thing wrong with taking his crap life out on his dog, who comes bellying back for forgiveness every single time, no matter how rotten the treatment- — Laura Wiess

Owning a dog is like having a demanding manner-less friend who never bathes themselves but which somehow ends up spending every single night on your couch. — Matte Resist

It makes me feel like working non-stop: at least, on sets, the level of security gives me a bit of privacy. It's a relief. — Robert Pattinson

It wasn't until someone kicked his legs that Nik woke up. Alek, snoring beside him, his head resting on his shoulder. Ban snoring on the other couch, the noise rivaled only by the dog. He looked into the impossibly cranky face of Zach Sheridan. "Y'all get food?"
"We had a full refrigerator before you three got here."
"Where I come from, we don't let the refrigerator get empty."
"Where you come from, you marry your sister. — Shelly Laurenston

If there's any advice I have to give, I would say it's that. If you're looking for a way to get closer to your kids, there ain't no better way than to grab 'em and read. And if you put them in front of a computer or a TV, you are abandoning them. You are abandoning them because they are sitting on a couch or a floor and they may be hugging a dog, but they ain't hugging you. — Maurice Sendak

No Love will remain unfulfilled. — Kristian Goldmund Aumann

Most dogs, when you hold a leash up, go nuts and run to the door. Crash, on the other hand barely looks up from his spot on the couch. His expression is saying, What the hell are you doing with that thing? — David Rosenfelt

New Rule: Stop leaving couches on the sidewalk. Besides being lazy and ugly, it's animal cruelty. You teach your dog not to pee on the couch, and then when you take him to the place he's supposed to pee, there's a couch. — Bill Maher

Well, rates would go up whether you deregulate or not, and of course, the rates that are going up right now on the electricity side are still within the regulated framework. — Kenneth Lay

If I had a bad day, which, now that I ran my own life, was a helluva lot less than the old days, I sat on the floor with Houdini, placed a hand on his broad head, and soaked up endless doggy wonder. A full stomach, a well-chewed toy, a soft couch - through a dog's eyes, that was a true glory that couldn't be matched, the only heaven in existence. I missed the furball, missed him like crazy. — Rob Thurman

I'm speechless. But my dick has plenty to say. I'm already hard at the idea of Wes being prepped and ready for me. I drop my mouth onto his and he moans again. My tongue glides across his piercing and we're off to the horny dog races. We kiss as if there's a meteor heading straight for the Toronto metropolitan area. Wes's eager hands roam my ass while I suck on his tongue. His eagerness is like a drug, and I want hit after hit. I can feel how hard he is, even through all of our clothes. He wants me to fuck him, and he's all primed and ready? "Mmm," I moan into his mouth. Sexiest fucking thing I ever heard. That's when the doorbell rings. "Hold that thought," I say, pushing up on one arm. "Nooooo!" Wes lifts both his legs to trap me in them. "No." Kiss. "No." Kiss. "Don't even think about it." Pinning his hands to the quilt is easy, because he's horny to the point of distraction. "Stop it, baby. It's the couch delivery. We're paying seventy-five bucks for them to show up on a Saturday. — Sarina Bowen

People eyeing you as a potential leader tend to ask three questions: Are you committed? Do you care about me? Can I trust you? — Lou Holtz

Come on, give me a shimmy!" Ruby screeched from the couch as she ground out one cigarette and then lit another. "You're fighting a battle of good and evil with your dog pimp! Your only weapon is the shimmy! There is power in the shimmy! Make him fear your shimmy! Now, goddamnit, show me your war shimmy! — Laurie Notaro

He thought there was chemistry? Faith had always hated chemistry at school but if she'd known a sexy Australian was going to seduce her with it in the future she may have paid more attention. — Amy Andrews

I will never again stand on the pitch as a professional player. But I won't stop playing the game. — Hidetoshi Nakata

My buddies are like, 'You live the most amazing life!' Well, I'm working like a dog. I come home most nights and pass out on the couch. — Dennis Crowley

Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun. — Groucho Marx

They say that dog is man's best friend, and I think it's true. My dog does a lot of the same stuff my best friend does, like drool on my couch, mooch my food and hump my wife. — Brad Wilkerson

I love, love, love apricot baby food. My closet in the kitchen is filled with jars of it. I love Lucky Charms and Cocoa Pebbles cereal. I love my purple couch, and I love dancing. I used to have the best stuffed animals, but Samson [her dog] ate them. — Alicia Silverstone

The tyrant now Trusts not to men: nightly within his chamber The watch-dog guards his couch, the only friend He now dare trust. — Joanna Baillie