Diaper Baby Quotes & Sayings

When we lived in a suburb of Atlanta, Georgia, my sister and I did a local play. My whole family got involved. My mom did the makeup. My sister and I were being homeschooled, and my parents wanted us to be socialized. We had a lot of fun with the other kids hanging out backstage. — Danielle Panabaker

Whatever it is probably won't go away, so we might as well live and laugh through it. When we double over laughing, we're bending so we won't break. If you think your particular troubles are too heavy and too traumatic to laugh about, remember that laughing is like changing a baby's diaper. It doesn't solve any problems permanently, but it makes things more acceptable for awhile. — Barbara Johnson

That dude's as guilty as a baby with a soggy diaper! — Noah Child

I photographed all kinds of sports - Formula 1, Formula Atlantic. And anybody who knows me knows that, from the day they invented video cameras, I used to lug them around when you had to carry the pack here and the big camera here, plus the diaper bag and a baby and the purse or whatever. — Christie Brinkley

The whole issue was almost unbelievably meaningless and small. He thought about the word "meaning" and tried to summon up his baby's face without looking at the photo, but all he could get was the heft of a full diaper and the plastic mobile over his crib turning in the breeze that the box fan in the doorway made. He imagined that the clock's second hand possessed awareness and knew that it was a second hand and that its job was to go around and around inside a circle of numbers forever at the same slow, unvarying machinelike rate, going no place it hadn't already been a million times before, and imagining the second hand was so awful it made his breath catch in his throat, and he looked quickly around to see if any of the examiners near him had heard it or were looking at him. — David Foster Wallace

It really bugs me the way people criticise how actors look. We're not models. Models exist. — Natalie Dormer

Declan, fortunately, was a forgiving guy and proved pretty accommodating as we figured things out together. He was patient as Sydney and I painstakingly read the instructions on the can of formula Lana sent. He made little complaint when I initially put his diaper on backward. When he grew tired again and started crying, I had no instructions to follow. Sydney gave a helpless shrug when I looked at her. So I just walked him around the living room, crooning classic rock songs until he dozed off and could be set down.
Rose, who'd stayed with us off and on but looked more terrified of the baby than a Strigoi, watched me with amazement. "You're kind of good at that," she remarked. "Adrian Ivashkov, baby whisperer."
I looked down at the sleeping baby. "I'm making it up as I go along. — Richelle Mead

The first time I tried to put a new diaper on my baby, I yanked the little Velcro strap too jerkily and actually punched the little guy in the jaw. A real solid shot, too. I knew instinctively that this could not be correct. Unless you're specifically trying to raise a welterweight, continual deliverance of powerful uppercuts is not advised when handling newborns. — Paul Reiser

When we are born into this world, the world revolves around us. We're spoon-fed on the front end and diaper-changed on the back end. It's as if the entire world exists to meet our every need. And that's fine if you are a two-month-old baby. If you're twenty-two, it's a problem! Newsflash: — Mark Batterson

There were times when it felt as though my children were annihilating me (truly you have not lived until you have changed one baby's diaper while another baby quietly vomits on your shin) and finally I came to the thought: all right, then, annihilate me, that other self was a fiction anyhow. — Sarah Ruhl

How's the world treating you this morning?'
'Like a baby treats a diaper. — Biyi Bandele-Thomas

My role is almost a sight-gag. I have to be a woman to sing the lyrics "I am a man" to have it be a joke. I start the lyric in a male-register and a whole coloratura up into a soprano. And other points in the show ... like the guy who likes to be treated like a baby and wear a diaper! — Max Von Essen

You will be at your best forever, Even now you have good moments. Occasional glimpses of your heavenly self. When you change your baby's diaper, forgive your boss's temper, tolerate your spouse's moodiness, you display traces of saintliness. — Max Lucado

baby's diaper is soiled, or it can be manually checked by inserting — Louis Borgenicht

Observe," she said. "You put the diaper under here, and around there, and you - if you had one - pin the whole thing ogether. Now you try it."
"Not me," he objected. "How about a paper clip? Or a paper staple?"
"I don't see what's bothering you," Meg said. "She's only a little girl."
"I did notice."
"And, if you follow scripture, was created after Adam."
"And - what's your point?"
"Being the second model, women turned out considerably better than men. God, when She did this second work, you'll note, got all the plumbing inside. — Emma Goldrick

It's what makes us different from every other creature in the world - we have time. And we have choices — Douglas Coupland

A cultural snob is someone who claims to be familiar with the incomprehensible. — Igor Stravinsky

Let us hope manufacturers can come up with a diaper that is environmentally sound. To go back to cloth would send us back to the day when breathing and raising a baby at the same time were incompatible. — Erma Bombeck

Why should anyone raise an eyebrow because a latter-day Einstein's wife expects her husband to put aside that lifeless theory of relativity and help her with the work that is supposed to be the essence of life itself: diaper the baby and don't forge to rinse the soiled diaper in the toilet paper before putting it in the diaper pail, and then wax the kitchen floor. — Betty Friedan

Well, I'm going to try. Better to practice on somebody else's kid first."

"Before what?" he asked, cautiously.

"I was just joking." Suddenly, I felt very defensive.

"You're sure your pill is working, right?"

"Yes! Don't worry, If I ever wanted to have a baby it doesn't have to be with you," I said, sensing rejection and fighting back.

"Well, who in the hell would it be with?" he asked, sounding irate.

"I don't know. I don't have a crystal ball."

"I've got news for you, Lilith. If you're going to be bearing anyone's children, they'll be mine," he said heatedly. Suddenly, the baby started crying.

"Now look what you did," I chastised. "You made him cry."

"I didn't make him cry. A shitty diaper made him cry. Now you want to take this on, I'll take it on with you. Bring him over here," Adam demanded, storming off with the diaper bag. — N.M. Silber

The book also includes tools including Website Resources, Baby Feeding/Diaper Schedule, Mom Medicine Schedule, Baby Clothes Size Chart, Baby Sitter Sheet, Short Hospital Bag Checklist, After Recovery Kit, Baby Medicine Basket Items, and 10 Things to Know When Traveling with a baby. — Lisa M. Rusczyk

You can hear the train in those lines; you can feel its rocking motion. — Alexander McCall Smith

As a president I will be like the candidate that I am, a respectful candidate, a rallying candidate, a normal candidate for a normal presidency, at the service of the Republic. — Francois Hollande

Guilt can prevent us from setting the boundaries that would be in our best interests, and in other people's best interests. — Melody Beattie

Life is filled with tragedy, with long patches of struggle and with, I think, beautiful bursts of joy and accomplishment. Blessed with those moments, you just try to relax as much as possible and focus on the little things, like the joy of changing your baby's diaper. — David Dastmalchian

Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. — Jimmy Piersall

I can dance beauty into my body — Padma Venkatraman

How to fold a diaper depends on the size of the baby and the diaper. — Benjamin Spock

Because it's one thing to survive. It is much, much harder to truly live. — Lisa Gardner

You know a little drink now and then never hurt nobody, but when you can't git started without asking the bottle, you in trouble. — Alice Walker

Looking forward to something? Take care while 'looking forward' not to miss the many potentially Good moments between now & then. — Russell Kyle

Oh what a morning it was, that first morning of Mrs. Sweet awaking before the baby Heracles with his angry cries, declaring his hunger, the discomfort of his wet diaper, the very aggravation of being new and in the world; the rays of sun were falling on the just and unjust, the beautiful and the ugly, causing the innocent dew to evaporate; the sun, the dew, the little waterfall right next to the village's firehouse, making a roar, though really it was an imitation of the roar of a real waterfall; the smell of some flower, faint, as it unfurled its petals for the first time: oh what a morning! — Jamaica Kincaid

The reason I trust so much is that I don't feel like I have anything to hide. If somebody betrays that trust, it could never be so bad, because I don't keep any secrets. — Kate Hudson

It's funny, I used to do a character that was just a baby - just an adult baby. I would get up onstage and complain about adult stuff, but as a baby. I was in a diaper, and I would require hugs from the audience and reassurance and stuff. — John Gemberling

Daddy is jive talking
and showering the stripper
Mommy is sleepwalking
while changing baby's diaper — Casey Renee Kiser

May there always be work for your hands to do. May your purse always hold a coin or two. May the sun always shine on your windowpane. May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain. Irish blessing — Stephen Revell

I felt so proud to be having a baby and so excited. And I felt closer to other women - to my sisters, to my mom. I felt empowered, like, 'I've given birth. I did it! There's nothing I can't handle.' I've really enjoyed this time that I have taken to be with Suri, as well as the challenges of the first couple of months: feeding and pumping, learning to decipher what each cry means - is she hungry? Is she tired? Does she need a fresh diaper? - and figuring out how to really help her. — Katie Holmes

God did not give the Bible so we could master him or it; God gave the Bible so we could live it, so we could be mastered by it. The moment we think we've mastered it, we have failed to be readers of the Bible. — Scot McKnight

[Crisco] ain't just for frying. You ever get a sticky something stuck in your hair,like gum? ... That's right, Crisco. Spread this on a baby's bottom, you won't even know what diaper rash is ... shoot, I seen ladies rub it under they eyes and on they husband's scaly feet ... Clean the goo from a price tag, take the squeak out a door hinge. Lights get cut off, stick a wick in it and burn it like a candle ... And after all that, it'll still fry your chicken. — Kathryn Stockett

I hurried to the fridge, got a bottle, and put it into a sink of hot water. While the formula was warming, Jack went to the bed and picked up Luke.
Holding him in a secure and competent grip, Jack murmured softly to the baby. It made no difference. Luke started squalling, his mouth wide open and his eyes screwed shut.
"There's no use in trying to quiet him." I rummaged in the diaper bag for a burp cloth. "He just screams louder and louder until he gets what he wants."
"Always works for me," Jack said.
-Luke, Ella, & Jack — Lisa Kleypas

I once knew a chap who had a system of just hanging the baby on the clothes line to dry and he was greatly admired by his fellow citizens for having discovered a wonderful innovation on changing a diaper. — Damon Runyon