De Mello Anthony Quotes & Sayings

It's only when you become love - in other words, when you have dropped your illusions and attachments - that you will "know." As you identify less and less with the "me," you will be more at ease with everybody and with everything. — Anthony De Mello

"That of the person who sees other human beings as sinners," said the Master. — Anthony De Mello

Most people don't live aware lives. They live mechanical lives, mechanical thoughts - generally somebody else's - mechanical emotions, mechanical actions, mechanical reactions. — Anthony De Mello

The genius of a composer is found in the notes of his music; but analyzing the notes will not reveal his genius. The poet's greatness is contained in his words; yet the study of his words will not disclose his inspiration. God reveals himself in creation; but scrutinize creation as minutely as you wish, you will not find God, any more than you will find the soul through careful examination of your body. — Anthony De Mello

Every word, every image used for God is a distortion more than a description. — Anthony De Mello

Spirituality practiced in the state of activity is incomparably superior to that practiced in a state of withdrawel. — Anthony De Mello

Problems exist only in the human mind. — Anthony De Mello

Do you think you help people because you are in love with them? Well, I've got news for you. You are never in love with anyone. You're only in love with your prejudiced and hopeful idea of that person. Take a minute to think about that: You are never in love with anyone, you're in love with your prejudiced idea of that person. — Anthony De Mello

To relate is to react. To react is to understand oneself. To understand oneself is to be enlightened. Relationships are schools for enlightenment. — Anthony De Mello

There is no explanation you can give that will explain away all the sufferings and evil and torture and destruction and hunger in the world! You'll never explain it. Because life is a mystery, which means your thinking mind cannot make sense of it. For that you've got to wake up and then you'll suddenly realize that reality is not the problem, you are the problem. — Anthony De Mello

Name one practical, down-to-earth effect of spirituality," said the skeptic who was ready for an argument. "Here's one," said the Master. "When someone offends you, you can raise your spirits to heights where offenses cannot reach. — Anthony De Mello

Perfect love casts out fear. Where there is love there are no demands, no expectations, no dependency. I do not demand that you make me happy; my happiness does not lie in you. If you were to leave me, I will not feel sorry for myself; I enjoy your company immensely, but I do not cling. — Anthony De Mello

What is love?"; "The total absence of fear," said the Master; "What is it we fear?"; "Love," said the Master. — Anthony De Mello

Are you your clothes? Are you your name? Are you your profession? Stop identifying with them. They come and go — Anthony De Mello

A prisoner lived in solitary confinement for years. He saw and spoke to no one and his meals were served through an opening in the wall. One day an ant came into his cell. The man contemplated it in fascination as it crawled around the room. He held it in the palm of his hand the better to observe it, gave it a grain or two, and kept it under his tin cup at night. One day it suddenly struck him that it had taken him ten long years of solitary confinement to open his eyes to the loveliness of an ant. — Anthony De Mello

When I speak, you must not listen to the words, my dear. Listen to the Silence. — Anthony De Mello

Obedience keeps the rules. Love knows when to break them. — Anthony De Mello

Said a disciple, 'I don't trade my love for money.'
Said the Master, 'isn't itas bad - or worse - that you trade it for love? — Anthony De Mello

The words of the scholar are to be understood. The words of the master are not to be understood. They are to be listened to as one listens to the wind in the trees and the sound of the river and the song of the bird. They will awaken something within the heart that is beyond all knowledge. — Anthony De Mello

Nobody is afraid of the unknown, what you really fear is the loss of the known. — Anthony De Mello

To be properly wicked, you do not have to break the Law. Just observe it to the letter. — Anthony De Mello

Say goodbye to golden yesterdays: or your heart will never learn to love the present. — Anthony De Mello

I have no fear of losing u, for you aren't an object of my property, or anyone else's. I love you as you are, without attachment, without fears, without conditions, without egoism, trying not to absorb you. I love you freely because I love your freedom, as well as mine. — Anthony De Mello

When you fight something, you're tied to it forever. As long as you're fighting it, you're giving it power. — Anthony De Mello

If it is peace you want, seek to change yourself, not other people. It is easier to protect your feet with slippers than to carpet the whole of the earth. — Anthony De Mello

The greatest learning of the ages lies in accepting life exactly as it comes to us. — Anthony De Mello

Said the monk: "All these mountains and rivers and the earth and stars - where do they come from?" Said the master: "Where does your question come from?" — Anthony De Mello

We live in a flash of light; evening comes and it is night forever. It's only a flash and we waste it. We waste it with our anxiety, our worries, our concerns, our burdens. — Anthony De Mello

The devil has a Ph.D. in perfect logic. — Anthony De Mello

Drop your false ideas. See through people. If you see through yourself, you will see through everyone. Then you will love them. Otherwise you spend the whole time grappling with your wrong notions of them, with your illusions that are constantly crashing against reality. — Anthony De Mello

These things will destroy the human race: politics without principle, progress without compassion, wealth without work, learning without silence, religion without fearlessness, and worship without awareness. — Anthony De Mello

You are only a disciple because your eyes are closed. The day you open them you will see there is nothing you can learn from me or anyone. — Anthony De Mello

Isn't there such a thing as social liberation?" "Of course there is," said the Master. "How would you describe it?" "Liberation from the need to belong to the herd. — Anthony De Mello

People mistakenly assume that their thinking is done by their head; it is actually done by the heart which first dictates the conclusion, then commands the head to provide the reasoning that will defend it. — Anthony De Mello

A disciple, in his reverence for the Master, looked upon him as God incarnate. "Tell me, O Master," he said, "why you have come into this world." "To teach fools like you to stop wasting their time worshiping Masters. — Anthony De Mello

You know, all mystics - Catholic, Christian, non-Christian, no matter what their theology, no matter what their religion - are unanimous on one thing: that all is well, all is well. Though everything is a mess, all is well. Strange paradox, to be sure. But, tragically, most people never get to see that all is well because they are asleep. They are having a nightmare. — Anthony De Mello

The sun and its light, the ocean and the wave, the singer and his song - not one. Not two. — Anthony De Mello

All is well, all is well. Though everything is a mess, all is well. — Anthony De Mello

May the peace of God disturb you always. — Anthony De Mello

Thought can organize the world so well that you are no longer able to see it. — Anthony De Mello

Live your life as you see fit. That's not selfish. Selfish is to demand that others live their lives as you see fit. — Anthony De Mello

Charity is never so lovely as when one has lost consciousness that one is practicing charity. 'You mean I helped you? I was enjoying myself. I was just doing my dance. It helped you, that's wonderful. Congratulations to you. No credit to me. — Anthony De Mello

Doesn't everyone see Reality as it is? — Anthony De Mello

Can one be fully human without experiencing tragedy? The only tragedy there is in the world is ignorance; all evil comes from that. — Anthony De Mello

You don't have to add anything in order to be happy; you've got to drop something. — Anthony De Mello

Take away human beings from this planet and life would go on, nature would go on in all its loveliness and violence. Where would the problem be? No problem. You created the problem. You are the problem. You identified with "me" and that is the problem. The feeling is in you, not in reality. — Anthony De Mello

The only way to change is by changing your understanding. — Anthony De Mello

To those who seek to protect their ego true Peace brings only disturbance. — Anthony De Mello

The philosopher Diogenes was eating bread and lentils for supper. He was seen by the philosopher Aristippus, who lived comfortably by flattering the king. Said Aristippus, 'If you would learn to be subservient to the king you would not have to live on lentils.'

Said [author:Diogenes|3213618, 'Learn to live on lentils and you will not have to be subservient to the king". — Anthony De Mello

"Why is everyone here so happy except me?" "Because they have learned to see goodness and beauty everywhere," said the Master. "Why don't I see goodness and beauty everywhere?" "Because you cannot see outside of you what you fail to see inside." — Anthony De Mello

If you search within your heart, you will find something there that will make it possible for you to understand: a spark of disenchantment and discontent, which if fanned into flame will become a raging forest fire that will burn up the whole of the illusory world you are living in, thereby unveiling to your wondering eyes the kingdom that you have always lived in unsuspectingly. — Anthony De Mello

Wisdom can be learned . But it cannot be taught . — Anthony De Mello

The important thing is not to know who "I" is or what "I" is. You'll never succeed. There are no words for it. The important thing is to drop the labels. — Anthony De Mello

You're so ashamed of your past; drop it! You're so proud of your past; drop it! — Anthony De Mello

What you are aware of you are in control of; what you are not aware of is in control of you. — Anthony De Mello

To fight evil with activity is like fighting darkness with one's hands. So what you need is light, not fit. — Anthony De Mello

One of my favorite definitions of enlightenment comes from a Jesuit priest named Anthony de Mello, who passed away some years ago. Someone asked him to define his experience of enlightenment. He said, "Enlightenment is absolute cooperation with the inevitable." I love that, because it defines enlightenment not just as a realization, but as an activity. Enlightenment is when everything within us is in cooperation with the flow of life itself, with the inevitable. — Adyashanti

Whatever is truly alive must die. Look at the flowers; only plastic flowers never die. — Anthony De Mello

Don't ask the world to change....you change first. — Anthony De Mello

You are never in love with anyone. You're only in love with your prejudiced and hopeful idea of that person. — Anthony De Mello

When the eye is unobstructed, the result is sight. When the ear is unobstructed, the result is hearing. When the mind is unobstructed the result is truth. When the heart is unobstructed, the result is joy and love. — Anthony De Mello

Everybody was talking about the religious man who committed suicide.
While no one in the monastery approved of the man's action, some say they admired his faith.
Faith?" said the Master.
He had the courage of his convictions, didn't he?"
That was fanaticism, not faith. Faith demands a greater courage still: to reexamine one's convictions and reject them if they do not fit the facts. — Anthony De Mello

The butterfly in a caterpillar: the eagle in an egg; the saint in a selfish human being. — Anthony De Mello

The three most difficult things for a human being are not physical feats or intellectual achievements. They are, first, returning love for hate; second, including the excluded; third, admitting that you are wrong. — Anthony De Mello

If you look carefully you will see that there is one thing and only one thing that causes unhappiness. The name of that thing is attachment. What is an attachment? An emotional state of clinging caused by the belief that without some particular thing or some person you cannot be happy. — Anthony De Mello

The Rose does not preen herself to catch my eye. She blooms because she blooms. A saint is a saint until he knows he is one. — Anthony De Mello

You only change what you understand. What you do not understand and are not aware of, you repress. You dont change. But when you understand it, it changes. — Anthony De Mello

I leave you free to be yourself: to think your thoughts, indulge your tastes, follow your inclinations, behave in ways that you decide are to your liking. — Anthony De Mello

The feigning sleeper can delude others he cannot delude himself. The false mystic, unfortunately, can delude both others and himself. — Anthony De Mello

One always treads with a joyful step when one has dropped the burden called the ego. — Anthony De Mello

There is another more subtle way in which the innocence of childhood is lost: when the child is infected with the desire to become somebody. Contemplate the crowds of people who are striving might and main to become, not what Nature intended them to be- musicians, cooks, mechanics, carpenters, gardeners, inventors- but "somebody": to become successful, famous, powerful; to become something that will bring not quiet and self-fulfillment, but self-glorification and self-expansion — Anthony De Mello

Loneliness is not cured by human company. Loneliness is cured by contact with reality. — Anthony De Mello

Sin is a refusal to grow, a refusal to love, a refusal to get committed, to be concerned, and to take risks. — Anthony De Mello

The disciples were absorbed in a discussion of Lao-Tzu's dictum: "Those who know, do not say; Those who say, do not know." When the master entered, they asked him what the words meant. Said the master, "Which of you knows the fragrance of a rose?" All of them indicated that they knew. Then he said, "Put it into words." All of them were silent. — Anthony De Mello

Concepts are always frozen. Reality flows. — Anthony De Mello

People who want a cure, provided they can have it without pain, are like those who favour progress, provided they can have it without change. — Anthony De Mello

If you want to know what it means to be happy, look at a flower, a bird, a child; they are perfect images of the kingdom. For they live from moment to moment in the eternal now with no past and no future. — Anthony De Mello

There were rules in the monastery, but the Master always warned against the tyranny of the law. 'Obedience keeps the rules,' he would say. 'Love knows when to break them.' — Anthony De Mello

Wisdom comes to those who learn nothing, unlearn everything. — Anthony De Mello

"I seek the meaning of existence," said the stranger. "You are of course assuming," said the Master, "that existence has a meaning." "Doesn't it?" "When you experience existence as it is - not as you think it is you will discover that your question has no meaning," said the Master. — Anthony De Mello

What is a loving heart? A loving heart is sensitive to the whole of life, to all persons; a loving heart doesn't harden itself to any persons or things. — Anthony De Mello

The law is an expression of God 's holy will and as such must be honored and loved," said the preacher piously. "Rubbish," said the Master. "The law is a necessary evil and as such must be cut down to the barest minimum. Show me a lover of the law and I will show you a muttonheaded tyrant . — Anthony De Mello

You have to understand, my dears, that the shortest distance between truth and a human being is a story. — Anthony De Mello

A nice definition of an awakened person: a person who no longer marches to the drums of society, a person who dances to the tune of the music that springs up from within. — Anthony De Mello

The best things in life cannot be willed into being. — Anthony De Mello

As the great Confucius said, "The one who would be in constant happiness must frequently change." Flow. But we keep looking back, don't we? We cling to things in the past and cling to things in the present ... Do you want to enjoy a symphony? Don't hold on to a few bars of the music. Don't hold on to a couple of notes. Let them pass, let them flow. The whole enjoyment of a symphony lies in your readiness to allow the notes to pass ... — Anthony De Mello

A lost coin is found by means of a candle; the deepest truth is found by means of a simple story. — Anthony De Mello

As you identify less and less with the "me", you will be more at ease with everybody and with everything. Do you know why? Because you are no longer afraid of being hurt or not liked. You no longer desire to impress anyone. Can you imagine the relief when you don't have to impress anybody anymore? Oh, what a relief. Happiness at last! — Anthony De Mello

of yourself and of other people. If you wish to attain to lasting happiness you must be ready to hate father, mother, even your own life and to take leave of all your possessions. How? Not by renouncing them or giving them up because what you give up violently you are forever bound to. But rather by seeing them for the nightmare they are; and then, whether you keep them or not, they will have lost their grip over you, their power to hurt you, and you will be out of your dream at last, out of your darkness, your fear, your unhappiness. So spend some time seeing each of the things you cling to for what it really is, a nightmare that causes you excitement and pleasure on the one hand but also worry, insecurity, tension, anxiety, fear, unhappiness on the other. — Anthony De Mello

Have you ever attempted to organize something like peace? The moment you do, you have power conflicts and group wars within the organization. The only way to have peace is to let it grow wild. — Anthony De Mello

I'm going to write a book someday and the title will be I'm an Ass, You're an Ass. That's the most liberating, wonderful thing in the world, when you openly admit you're an ass. It's wonderful. When people tell me, You're wrong I say, What can you expect of an ass? — Anthony De Mello

A disciple said to him, "I am ready, in the quest for God , to give up anything: wealth, friends, family, country, life itself. What else can a person give up?" The Master calmly replied, "One's beliefs about God. — Anthony De Mello

The Master made it his task to destroy systematically every
doctrine, every belief, every concept of the divine, for these
things, which were originally intended as pointers, were now
being taken as descriptions.
He loved to quote the Eastern saying When the sage points
to the moon, all that the idiot sees is the finger. — Anthony De Mello

Savoring slows us down. In the examen we don't recall an important experience simply to add it to a list of things that we've seen or done; rather, we savor it as if it were a satisfying meal. We pause to enjoy what has happened. It's a deepening of our gratitude to God, revealing the hidden joys of our days. As Anthony de Mello said, "You sanctify whatever you are grateful for." The — James Martin

Has it ever occurred to you that you can only love when
you are alone? — Anthony De Mello

No person on earth has the power to make you unhappy. There is no event on earth that has the power to disturb you or hurt you. No event, condition, situation, or person. Nobody told you this; they told you the opposite. That's why you're in the mess you're in right now. That is why you're asleep. They never told you this. But it's self-evident. — Anthony De Mello

Take the leap! You cannot cross a chasm in little jumps. — Anthony De Mello

Sinners often speak the truth. And saints have led people astray. Examine what is said, not the one who says it. — Anthony De Mello

Understand your darkness and it will vanish; then you will know what light is. Understand your nightmare for what it is and it will stop; then you will wake up to reality. Understand your false beliefs and they will drop; then you will know the taste of happiness. — Anthony De Mello

You can never be free
as long as you have an ego to defend. — Anthony De Mello