Dave Tv Quotes & Sayings

Part of the experience of enjoying a tennis match on TV is listening to the observations of an expert commentator
one who knows the sport, has a genuine passion for the game, respects the viewers' intelligence, knows when to talk and when to keep quiet, can make you laugh and is not afraid to call a spade a spade. — Dave McPherson

I have seen women walk right past a TV set with a football game on and - this always amazes me - not stop to watch, even if the TV is showing replays of what we call a "good hit," which is a tackle that causes at least one major internal organ to actually fly out of a player's body. — Dave Barry

I don't watch reality TV. I'm cool. — Dave Attell

I definitely want to start my own production company at some point. I'm actually teaming up with Funny or Die to put together a TV show right now, that I can't really talk about because it's still in the very preliminary stages, but if it pans out this will be the first project under my production company, which I have yet to name. — Dave Franco

I don't care if I ever work in TV again. — Dave Chappelle

Josie glanced back to the TV. Again the players seemed to be celebrating some minor achievement. It offended the eye at first, then Josie grew to understand it. That's what's missing in my life, she thought. The celebration of every single moment, like those fucking idiots on TV. — Dave Eggers

But that's kind of an easy stance to be if you're a humor columnist, because you're tending to make fun of the government and the powerful. I'm sort of a soft-core libertarian in that my compass is generally pointing away from 'Let's let the government do this' Does it matter to me that it's Democrats who think we need more elaborate programs that involve shifting money from one group to another group or it's Republicans saying we need to take a harder look at what kinds of things people are watching on cable TV? Neither one of those things strikes me as a good idea. — Dave Barry

It evolved out of the idea to make a kids TV show. And it actually turned out to be a bit dull and a bit regulated and too many people looking over your shoulder and it wasn't really. — Dave Rowntree

I don't watch reality TV. — Dave Attell

You would think that, by sheer chance, there would come a time when you daughter's two dances would be close together, ideally near the beginning. But the dance studio makes sure this never happens, using the same computer scheduling program that the cable-TV company uses to make sure that the technician, for whom you have been waiting eleven hours, rings your doorbell only when you have just commenced pooping. — Dave Barry

There are obviously legal restrictions on what you can do on TV in the States, as there are everywhere. — Dave Rowntree

I'm not a movie guy, I'm not a TV sitcom guy, but whatever seems to fit and is funny is good for me. — Dave Attell

In the kitchen, I turn on a TV set that has hundreds of channels devoted to every conceivable subject including celebrity bunion removal (This week: David Hasselhoff). I tune in to one of the literally dozens of news shows, all of which feature a format of 55 percent celebrities promoting things, 30 percent emails from viewers, and 15 percent YouTube videos showing bears jumping on trampolines. While I'm catching up on these developments, I turn on the programmable coffeemaker, which I hope that someday, perhaps by attending community college, I will learn to program. — Dave Barry

Only one of us would usually sing lead. Which most of the time was, Mickey or Dave. They thought it was perfectly a natural routine, because Mickey and Dave saw themselves as TV actors. — Peter Tork

I liked watching myself on TV. My first job was hosting the 'Roommate Game'. — Dave Annable

We ate all of this in front of Tack's huge, flat-screen TV in the living room where I was treated to a marathon of Storage Wars. Seeing as I didn't watch TV, I'd never heard of this program. But by the second episode I was hooked. I declared that I thought Brandi and Jarrod were "adorable" together, which for some reason he didn't explain made Rush laugh so hard I thought he would bust a gut. Rush might find that funny but I decided I was going to start dressing like Brandi. She always looked the shit. I also shared that Dave was my favorite "character" to which Tabby told me with grave seriousness, "But, Tyra, he's the bad guy. — Kristen Ashley

I think readers are always patient. Look at the 'Harry Potter' series. Some have given up on this generation of kids as game and TV addicts, but lots of people spend lots of time patiently reading through hundreds of pages of dense prose. I think reading a comic by comparison is a lot more immediate. — Dave Gibbons

Terry Jackson, who is the Miami Herald's automotive writer and TV critic. That's correct: This man gets paid to drive new cars AND watch television. If he ever dies and goes to heaven, it's going to be a big let down. — Dave Barry

The funny thing is that I had never actually watched TV. — Dave Willis

When I was in high school, The Dave Matthews Band was a local band, and that was the first time I was starting to connect with a live band that was something that wasn't on the radio or TV. — Jason Mraz

onlinerokusupport how-to-setup-and-activate-roku-solved/
You need a Roku Player, it can be any model, Roku 1, Roku 2, Roku 3, Roku 4, Roku Streaming Stick.
Connecting Cables according to the TV for example Composite Cables, Component Cables, HDMI Cable.
A Power adapter to connect Roku.
The first step connect adapter to the Roku Player and check if you are able to see a light lit on the device.
Next, connect the Composite or Component cables which is easy, just match the colors of cables and connect.
If you TV is HD or Full HD, you will have to connect just 1 cable that will be HDMI Cable with "flattened end'
Power on your TV and use the TV Remote to select the input on the TV Screen.
You may use 'Input Button', or 'Source Button' to select correct input.
Once the Input is correct, you will be able to to see "Roku Setup" on the Tv Screen.
Now you are good to go, lets now proceed with Activation of Roku. — Dave

Life goes on, end of tunnel, TV set
Spot in the middle
Static fade, statistic bit
And soon I fade away, fade away — Dave Matthews

I do not mean to be the slightest bit critical of TV newspeople, who do a superb job, considering that they operate under severe time constraints and have the intellectual depth of hamsters. But TV news can only present the "bare bones" of a story; it takes a newspaper, with its capability to present vast amounts of information, to render the story truly boring. — Dave Barry

There isn't an amount of money you could offer me to do reality TV. I would rather get my job back on the building site. Or I could own a construction business. Maybe I could retire to my house in Long Island and take up painting, like Captain Beefheart. A crazy recluse: I like that idea. — Dave Gahan

Say you're watching a TV show. Say it's 24, starring Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer, the angst-ridden lone-wolf federal agent who protects America from terrorism by sooner or later causing the violent death of pretty much everybody he meets. If you study this show carefully, you will notice something curious: Jack Bauer never goes to the bathroom. That's why he's so ridden with angst. — Dave Barry

When I was very young I couldn't watch anything black and white on TV because I knew the people moving were now dust. — Dave Eggers

I don't think that TV on the Radio is some dark mysterious band that no one can know about. We write music because it's an immediate form of communication. We're able to put on record what's happening in our times, and we want that message to be heard by the most amount of people. — Dave Sitek

But you know, there's something about the kids finishing their homework in a given day, working one-on-one, getting all this attention - they go home, they're finished. They don't stall, they don't do their homework in front of the TV. — Dave Eggers

When a man purchases a necessary appliance such as a TV with a flat screen the size of a squash court, he cannot afford to fritter away valuable minutes reading the owner's manual, especially when the first seventeen pages consist of statements like: WARNING: Do not test the electrical socket by sticking your tongue into it. A man does not need instructions written by and for idiots. A man already knows, based on extensive experience in the field of being male, that the way to handle an appliance is to plug all the plugs into the holes that look to be about the right size or color, then turn everything on and see what happens. This is the system I use, and it has proved to be 100 percent effective roughly 65 percent of the time. — Dave Barry

Several months ago, out of the blue, a company named "Cingular" started sending me bills. I had never heard of Cingular, and I honestly did not know what these bills were for, so I put them in the pile where I keep documents that I intend to scrutinize more carefully later on, after my death. Then I started seeing TV commercials for Cingular, but of course they did not make it clear what Cingular is, because the First Rule of Modern Advertising is: "Never reveal what you are advertising." — Dave Barry

If there really is a God who created the entire universe with all of its glories, and He decides to deliver a message to humanity, He will not use, as His messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle. — Dave Barry

Here's my proposal, which is based on the TV show Survivor: We put the entire Congress on an island. All the food on this island is locked inside a vault, which can be opened only by an ordinary American taxpayer named Bob. Every day, the congresspersons are given a section of the Tax Code, which they must rewrite so that Bob can understand it. If he can, he lets them eat that day; if he can't, he doesn't. — Dave Barry

This is a great time for the 'guerilla marketer.' The days when you used to have to buy expensive TV time and a yellow page ad to get started are gone. — Dave Ramsey

I can't say I was like a die-hard zombie fan, but I've definitely seen a few different zombie movies and TV shows. — Dave Franco

I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not for the fact that the TV news personalities make sad faces for sad stories and happy faces for happy stories. — Dave Barry

I like doing stand-up and I love putting out TV specials. — Dave Attell

You know, we were worried that in the UK, there's no anarchy on kids TV. When we grew up kids TV was very anarchic and it was about stuff that your parents would probably object to, if they got to object. And it's gotten very safe. — Dave Rowntree