Darned Quotes & Sayings

I tried opening the door to the car again, forgetting the darned thing would not open. "You need to get this door fixed," I nagged.
"It's not broken, my lovely," David grinned.
"Then why won't it open?"
"Child locks to keep the princess from opening the door herself." He gave me a crooked smile.
"Oh," I blushed. — Nely Cab

America, I know we have our problems. I realize that the scale and our waistline
are foremost among them. I'm willing to make concessions, I really am. I drink, and prefer, skim milk. I'll take water packed tuna over oil packed tuna any day. I can stomach low-fat ranch or I-Can't-Believe-It's-Not-Anything. I'll even look the other way on sugar free ice cream (believe me that one hurts), but I'll be darned if I'm gonna let somebody take my delicious delicious pig fat from me. I'd rather die. — Aaron Blaylock

Why do airline pilots always call passengers "folks"? I don't usually take umbrage at generic terminology
I'm one of those forward-thinkers who believes that "man" encompasses the whole darned race
but at whatever 0'clock in the mornning. I thought it would be nice to be called sometihng that suggested unwashed masses a little less. — C.E. Murphy

I've been booed off the field, and I've been carried off the field by people cheering me. So I've seen both ends of it, and I can tell you the bad side of it gets a lot more attention than the good side does, but the good side is pretty darned good when it's on your side. — Tom Glavine

I didn't think much of men's pajamas, ever. Only Max could make pajamas, even every day, normal pajama bottoms and a t-shirt like the ones he was wearing, look so darned good. — Kristen Ashley

To go fishing is the chance to wash one's soul with pure air, with the rush of the brook, or with the shimmer of sun on blue water. It brings meekness and inspiration from the decency of nature, charity toward tackle-makers, patience toward fish, a mockery of profits and egos, a quieting of hate, a rejoicing that you do not have to decide a darned thing until next week. And it is discipline in the equality of men - for all men are equal before fish. — Herbert Hoover

Women have got to make the world safe for men since men have made it so darned unsafe for women. — Nancy Astor The Viscountess Astor

Oil's been pretty darned good to us," she said. "I don't want a smaller house. I don't want to drive a smaller car. — Arlie Russell Hochschild

Jesus, you piss me off," he murmured. "Good thing your cunt's so fucking hot."
"Don't call it that."
His lip twitched.
"Good thing your vagina's so gosh-darned hot," he whispered. "Because I really, really want to stick my penis in it and have repeated sexual intercourse, bringing us to a mutually satisfactory culmination of our desires. How's that sound? — Joanna Wylde

My God ... how magnificent of a man do you have to be to go through what you went through, doing it alone, nobody to ease the way, the pain, no mother, no brother no sister, all by yourself enduring that and fight your way to becoming all that you are. It isn't amazing. It's a darned miracle. — Kristen Ashley

[On New York City:] From a dating point of view, it's like a really large rummage sale - lots of strange items, but darned little that you'd want to take home. — Mary Jo Putney

The problem was that Panama technically belonged to Colombia, which refused to sign a treaty leasing it to the United States. So Roosevelt sent a gunboat filled with marines down to Panama, just on the off chance that a revolution might suddenly break out, and darned if one didn't, two days later. Not only that, but the leaders of the new nation of Panama-talk about lucky breaks!-were absolutely thrilled to have the United States build a canal there. 'Really, it's our pleasure,' they told the marines, adding, 'Don't shoot.' — Dave Barry

There isn't any devil in a good dog. That's why they're more lovable than cats, I reckon. But I'm darned if they're as interesting. — L.M. Montgomery

I'll be darned!" said Douglas. "I never thought of that. That's brilliant! It's true. Old people never were children!"
"And it's kind of sad," said Tom, sitting still."There's nothing we can do to help them. — Ray Bradbury

I'm a darned good listener. — Naomi Judd

I love books, by the way, way more than movies. Movies tell you what to think. A good book lets you choose a few thoughts for yourself. Movies show you the pink house. A good book tells you there's a pink house and lets you paint some of the finishing touches, maybe choose the roof style,park your own car out front. My imagination has always topped anything a movie could come up with. Case in point, those darned Harry Potter movies. That was so not what that part-Veela-chick, Fleur Delacour, looked like. — Karen Marie Moning

It was all a mistake," he pleaded, standing out of his ship, his wife slumped behind him in the deeps of the hold, like a dead woman. "I came to Mars like any honest enterprising businessman. I took some surplus material from a rocket that crashed and I built me the finest little stand you ever saw right there on that land by the crossroads - you know where it is. You've got to admit it's a good job of building." Sam laughed, staring around. "And that Martian - I know he was a friend of yours - came. His death was an accident, I assure you. All I wanted to do was have a hot-dog stand, the only one on Mars, the first and most important one. You understand how it is? I was going to serve the best darned hot dogs there, with chili and onions and orange juice." The — Ray Bradbury

Family. I thought of Dar and Leethu, of all the demons I had a strange affection for. I thought of Wyatt, of Amber and Nyalla, of Michelle and Candy. And I thought of that darned angel. They were all my family; mine. — Debra Dunbar

I like to set my dreams high. That way, even if I only make it half way there, it's still pretty darned good. — Elizabeth O. Dulemba

If only Ed Fleming had a mother who gave such sound advice. The manager of Wazoo's, a downtown Denver restaurant, Fleming is a CSU alum who has been darned giddy about the Rams' recent success. So giddy that he donned a necklace made of Pez candies, a red blazer - and nothing else. A few people gaped (some actually set aside their beers), but most ignored Fleming as he strutted like a red-blazered rooster, demanding that all hail the Mighty Naked Beer King. — J.R. Moehringer

It made me feel better. Mouse might not have been the
smartest creature on earth, but he was steady, kind, loyal, and
was possessed of the uncanny wisdom of beasts for knowing
whom to trust. I might not have been a superhero, but Mouse
thought that I was pretty darned cool. That meant something. It
would have to be enough. — Jim Butcher

Une immense esprance a travers la terre', he read somewhere, and his comment was:'
and it's darned-well drowned everything worth having. — D.H. Lawrence

You can do a great many things if you're rich which would be severely criticised if you were poor. You can go and come, you can travel alone, you can have your own establishment: I mean of course if you'll take a companion - some decayed gentlewoman, with a darned cashmere and dyed hair, who paints on velvet. — Henry James

That's right. Endgame. The FAYZ barrier is coming down; at least that's my bet. But there's also a ninety percent chance you and me both end up dead. Ten percent chance we both actually get out alive. In which case we end up sharing a cell somewhere." He laughed. "Kind of unfair, really, what with me being evil and all, and you just so darned virtuous and heroic. — Michael Grant

I've been looking over the list of spring chores I made up last fall, and darned if they aren't fall chores, after all. — Robert Breault

And she rarely forgot that while her grammar and accent were above the town standard, she wore a plain cap, cooked the family dinner, and darned all the stockings. — George Eliot

I do a lot of working out, but I haven't been kicking for a while, so one time I was rehearsing a spinning roundhouse and darned near threw out my leg. — Jackie Earle Haley

That's it! said Jo to herself, when she at length discovered that genuine good will toward one's fellow men could beautify and dignify even a stout German teacher, who shoveled in his dinner, darned his own socks, and was burdened with the name of Bhaer. — Louisa May Alcott

My uncle ordered popovers from the restaurant's bill of fare. And, when they were served, he regarded them with a penetrating stare. Then he spoke great words of wisdom as he sat there on that chair: "To eat these things," said my uncle, "You must exercise great care. You may swallow down what's solid, but you must spit out the air!" And as you partake of the world's bill of fare, that's darned good advice to follow. Do a lot of spitting out the hot air. And be careful what you swallow. — Dr. Seuss

A slim shoulder shrugged on the other side of Mako, and his darned dog slid down and plopped her head into Becky's lap. Jealousy burned in Kelly. Becky had a really nice lap. — Kim Law

Golf is not sacred, and there is no use getting so gosh-darned solemn about it. — Don Herold

Write the tests first, or second, or third. But write the darned tests. — Russ Olsen

The war was not on that map, and neither was the surrender ... that makes me happy and sad - happy because I know the streams will keep streaming and the skies will keep clouding and clearing, even as people fight and tear and claw at each other ... what we do makes me sad too because what difference do we make? Looking around me, at all the graves and leftover destruction - seems we just keep on messing up a darned good thing. — Margaret McMullan

My wife is like, You finally get your own TV show, you can have any kind of car you want and you get a darned truck. But my brother and I have the same kind of truck now. — Jeff Foxworthy

We know darned well that in Bosnia, certain governments and the secretary had said tens of thousands are needed in Srebrenica and those people were never provided. — Alex Morrison

In one line of his poem he said good fences make good neighbors. I'd like to think that Alaska and British Columbia working together can prove that we can be pretty darned good neighbors without fences. — Dan Miller

She thought it over, but couldn't see any immediate loopholes other than the threat of her inner slut emerging, and she could darned well control that little bitch. — Susan Elizabeth Phillips

History isn't like that. History unravels gently, like an old sweater. It has been patched and darned many times, reknitted to suit different people, shoved in a box under the sink of censorship to be cut up for the dusters of propaganda, yet it always - eventually - manages to spring back into its old familar shape. History has a habit of changing the people who think they are changing it. History always has a few tricks up its frayed sleeve. It's been around a long time. — Terry Pratchett

Too darned good a machine can be a menace, not a help. — John W. Campbell

Ace!" Tate shouted, both Wendy and I jumped and twisted our necks to look his way. "You cashed out or what?" Tate asked still in a shout.
"I'm cashed out," I shouted back.
"You wanna socialize for the next hour or are we gonna go?" He was still shouting and I was acutely aware, due to the fact that the noise level declined significantly, that the entire bar was listening.
"Keep your pants on!" I yelled.
The noise level disappeared.
"Babe, get your ass over here," Tate ordered.
"Patience, Captain, I'm talking to Wendy," I shot back.
"Ass. Over. Here!" Tate commanded.
I looked at Wendy and snapped loudly, "He's so darned bossy!"
Two men and a woman sitting at the bar close to us burst out laughing.
"You better get your ass over there," Wendy advised, I rolled my eyes and stomped across the bar. — Kristen Ashley

Dad's death didn't hollow me out the way Helen's had. After all, everyone had assumed Dad was a goner back when he got kicked in the head as a child. Instead, he had cheated death and, despite his gimp and speech impediment, lived a long life doing pretty much what he wanted. He hadn't drawn the best of cards, but he'd played his hand darned well, so what was there to grieve over? — Jeannette Walls

I wrote each book in thirty-five days flat - just to get the darned thing finished. — Alistair MacLean

The one thing that has changed dramatically when you talk to the people of New Zealand and people from Ireland? They feel a darned-sight better about themselves because they made the decision to do what they've done, and I can say to you, we would feel a bloody darned sight better about ourselves once we get an opportunity to put this [vote on same-sex marriage] out there. — Tony Abbott

Worry never climbed a hill, worry never paid a bill, Worry never dried a tear, worry never calmed a fear, Worry never darned a heel, worry never cooked a meal, It never led a horse to water, nor ever did a thing it "oughter — Anonymous

Wilton Spencer," she said softly, "why do you have to be so damned smart?"
Spence smiled. "Darned smart," he said; then he wiped her tears away and kissed her on the tip of her nose. — Jackie French Koller

You kids are handling this a whole lot better than he is.'
I wondered if that meant we were pretty darned tough.
Or whether we simply lacked the imagination to see how bad things really were — Mike A. Lancaster

But still, I'd be darned if I was going to be one of those Americans who stomp around Italy barking commands in ever-louder English. I was going to be one of those Americans who traversed Italy with my forehead knit in concentration, divining wordsw from their Latin roots and answering by wedging French cognates into Italian pronunciations spliced onto a standard Spanish verb conjugation. — Barbara Kingsolver

When you're sad or depressed, you might as well get something done," Lydia always said. "Pretty soon, you're not sad or depressed, and darned if things aren't done. — Cathy Lamb

Life would be a darned sight simpler if feelings were as easy to patch up as a piece of sailcloth. — Harry Haskell