Dane Quotes & Sayings

I've been with Dane for four years," I managed to say. "He understands me in a way you don't."
"I can learn you."
-Ella & Jack — Lisa Kleypas

I don't hate Dane Cook, but I am trying to go after people I think are capable of more. — Andy Kindler

I say it with my tongue firmly planted in cheek but there's truth to it - being a comedian is very close to being a therapist. When you're working smaller clubs, you're listening. You're feeling an energy, you're going with a tone but when people start yelling out, you almost start a conversation with people. — Dane Cook

Why are you taking your breasts away?"
-Dane "Cernunnos" Hearne — Katie MacAlister

I love being directed. I always find it helpful to have someone else's brain in the mix and not just have to rely on myself. — Dane DeHaan

When I'm wrong I'm like the Emperor on the Death Star thinking he'll turn Luke. Yet, when I'm right I'm a Jedi like my father before me. — Dane Cook

Simply put: writing is rewriting. — Ronald Dane

Friends will sit your ass down and give you the 'Come To Jesus' talk when you need it most. — Lauren Dane

A laugh burst from Nina's lips. Not as awkward as it must be for you. Honey, please. If you bent around any harder trying to let me know you fucked Lex to try and make me feel bad, you'd be a pretzel. Although you're about as smart as one. — Lauren Dane

Does this mean you're going to marry me then?"
"I've only been pestering you to marry me since the day we met, Daniel. What clued you in that I'd be interested other than that? — Lauren Dane

If haters or whatever want to find you - I mean, some of them are so tenacious. You want to hire them to work for you. They're very, very savvy in terms of how they find you and get to you. — Dane Cook

There were times, earlier in my career, where I didn't have the wherewithal to self-edit, and I probably said things and pushed the limits to places where people might be put off. But that's truly part of developing as an artist. — Dane Cook

Because of what I experienced when I was a kid, I want kids to have that kind of an epiphany moment, that little jolt, that little spark that they see when Dusty ['Planes'] flies higher than he has before. That scene where he flies straight up, and he's starting to get dizzy, and then finally it comes together. We forget as adults. We get jaded and we think that's kids' stuff, but for a kid who doesn't know about anything technical or how a movie is made, they're just going to see this and hear this beautiful score and see this dynamic, fantastical thing happening in front of them. — Dane Cook

That which triggers understanding often is found by bringing misunderstanding to the light. — Dane R. Pascoe

Oh. Dane. That's his name, right?" she asked. "He took our phones and put the shackles on us, but said we could use the phone on the table. I'm not sure if it's some kind of dominance posturing," she trailed off for a moment. "Actually yeah, having been around him for more than thirty seconds, I'm relatively certain that this is one hundred percent, testosterone-laden alpha male posturing. Is Jake like this?"
"I might be an idiot," I said, "but even I wouldn't fall for this sort of thing. A guy who goes to this length to seem awesome must have a dick the size of a gherkin. — Lynn Red

Jack explained. "Daisy, you were meant for me. Dane destroyed that. You're lucky I don't set you on fire right this minute. It's either you or him. Pick." Jack chewed on a tooth pick, took it out of his mouth and pointed it at her and then Dane. "Pick, pick, pick," he said, pointing back and forth. — Nancy Glynn

We writers can use our own longing - and frequently do - without ever having to understand or analyze it. That is why our stories are often wiser than we are. — Marion Dane Bauer

I'm a deep thinker when it comes to shallow no brainers. — Dane Cook

Cyclic knowledge is mind - knowledge - however vast and encompassing the mind may be. It is structural knowledge. It is only one mode of knowing; but this mode is all-important in situations where disorder, confusion, and emotional biases prevail. It does not take the place of direct experience, whether at the personal or the spiritual level; but it enables the experiencer to place his experience in a frame of reference which reveals their eonic significance - i.e. the function they occupy within the entire life-span. — Dane Rudhyar

Astrid Dane. . . Her long colorless hair was woven back into a braid, and her porcelain skin bled straight into the edges of her tunic. Her entire outfit was fitted to her like armor; the collar of her shirt was high and rigid, guarding her throat, and the tunic itself ran from chin to wrist to waist, less out of a sense of modesty, Kell was sure, than protection. Below a gleaming silver belt, she wore fitted pants that tapered into tall boots (rumor had it that a man once spat at her for refusing to wear a dress; she'd cut off his lips). The only bits of color were the pale blue of her eyes and the greens and reds of the talismans that hung from her neck and wrists and were threaded through her hair. . .
"I smell something sweet," she said. She'd been gazing up at the ceiling. Now her eyes wandered
down and landed on Kell. "Hello, flower boy. — V.E Schwab

This doesn't have fuck-all to do with independence. You're scared because you know if you start something with me, it'll go to a place you and Dane never went. He won't stand by you
he's already proved it. He went pussy on you. And now he gets laid for that?
Jack Travis — Lisa Kleypas

I used to tiptoe up to my bedroom door and leap into my room in an attempt to surprise my dolls in the midst of some kind of action. Unfortunately, they were always too quick for me. I'm still disappointed about that. — Marion Dane Bauer

You want to kill me, don't you? And here I thought you and your friends were so righteous. You are just as capable of evil as anyone. Perhaps more so. Yet you believe your brand of evil is justified, so long as it serves your own misguided purposes.
Saint Dane — D.J. MacHale

It feels good to have something to bring to the table," Ren said. "I will agree with that. But don't
mistake having money or stuff as being the same as being worthy. — Cameron Dane

He's going to try to take Megan! I shouted, fury filling me and spilling out in the form of the manifestation. I raced down the hill toward the crossroad, the pack of snarling, jingling, horned hell poodles streaming behind me.
Dane and his hell-poodles — Katie MacAlister

Strip clubs are great places to meet interesting people you only wanna know for about 40 minutes. — Dane Cook

Then it was snack time, right in the middle of mass. Right out of nowhere, the priest would look down and say, 'Let's have some yum yums!' You would get in line - you would jump in the line - and you would go up and get the crouton O'Christ. — Dane Cook

I am going to name a group of my kids after my favorite cartoons, I am going to name them after Transformers. — Dane Cook

I'm curious by individuals that embrace half a story so they can justify how incomplete they feel about their own self worth. — Dane Cook

A lot of comics are kind of vampire types; we do our shows and disappear into the night. My philosophy was, this is like politics, and if I want people to know about my campaign, I'm going to go out there and shake hands. — Dane Cook

You prefer thieving to honest work?" "Honest work? How much do you pay your maids annually? Six pounds? Eight? I can make that in a month - in a night, if all goes well. I could make more than that as a beggar. Why do you think so many take to the streets, begging? Because honest work is hardly honest when the only one profiting is the rich man who owns the workplace." She was right. Dane knew it, and he hated to accept — Shana Galen

Anger has a way of seeping into every other emotion and planting itself in there. — Dane Cook

You have to have a strong sense of humor to date me, and also know that you're probably going to be a part of the routine quite a bit. — Dane Cook

When you swear to God, its true ... right now God is watching and saying, this is true. — Dane Cook

Life changes and that's cool. Growing older is amazing, I think. — Dane DeHaan

Dr. Birdsell, my dramatic coach in school, always said that I was the most melancholy Dane that he had ever directed. — Donald Freed

I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny. — Dane Cook

When I have a really hot date at a show, I definitely make it a point to use her name. The girls really love that. — Dane Cook

I was being chased by a giant crab. [Audience laughs] That's not funny. — Dane Cook

We don't teach flowers to bloom; we ensure they have the best conditions in which to do so. — Dane R. Pascoe

Some people have constipation of the brain but their mouth has the runs. — Dane Cook

I do like to cook. But I only cook a few things, but those few things I do really well. — Eric Dane

I feel like the gods have certainly patted me on the head. — Dane Cook

Singing and being truthful to a song ... I've developed that skill, and I know how to do that real instinctively, that's all I've been doing for the last 25 years. — Taylor Dane

The Prohibition era is so vividly depicted in 'Lawless.' John Hillcoat does a remarkable job of rooting his film in such a tangible reality. — Dane DeHaan

Most people saw her as supremely confident and self assured but beneath that were the doubts. — Lauren Dane

I am an observer, I like to watch people. I am into psychology and people - how they act and such. — Dane Cook

Sometimes, when you want to make a difference in a person's life, stay out of it. — Dane Cook

I love hecklers. They remind you that you are a comedian. — Dane Cook

On stage I am the actor, director and the bouncer all at the same time. Fear does not exist in this dojo does it? No Sensi! Sorry when I get excited I have to toss in some Karate Kid quotes. — Dane Cook

I got home from work today and took like a one hundred hour nap. No you did not. You'd be very sick if you were taking one hundred hour naps. That's a coma! If you said you took a coma after work I'd be able to follow the story. — Dane Cook

I'm focused on staying as healthy as I can so I can work more. — Dane Cook

Sugar, I am not playing a game. This is serious. I mean to woo you, so shut up and let me do it. — Lauren Dane

It was weird - my parents would let me have some Green Day albums but not all Green Day albums. — Dane DeHaan

I grew up very self-loathing. I was a phobic. I had anxiety. I had panic attacks. — Dane Cook

I can do more than just stand-up comedy, and the only way I'll be able to show that is if I do it myself. Because nobody trusts that I can do it. — Dane Cook

People know I have a good time on stage. I love my life. I love my job. — Dane Cook

Dressed in new jeans, a light blue dress shirt and a red patterned tie, he stood at Heather's grave with his eyes closed. Although I didn't hear him, his lips were moving like he was praying. In the faint breeze, Mother Nature ran her fingers through his dark hair like I wanted to. He looked tall and strong, the way he used to, but somewhere along the way, without me, he'd stepped into the shoes of a man. And a part of me ached for those missing years. — Jordan Dane

Derek got in my face, close enough for me to smell his bad breath and get a zoom on his zits. One on his chin was ripe. The dude seriously needed to harvest. — Jordan Dane

A good friend of mine once said, I have never met a bigot who was a reader as a child. — Marion Dane Bauer

Why are you crying love?" he asked gently wiping off the tear, and looking at her a little worry evident in his own eyes.

"How? Why?" she whispered not knowing what to say.

"That doesn't matter, all that matter's is that are you happy." he said leading her inside the room.

"Are you happy?"

" I don't know what to say, this is Amazing... — Amy Dane

Blessed is he who talks in circles, for he shall become a big wheel. — Frank Dane

Nice teeth is a turn on for me. If you open your mouth and it looks like a battle of epic proportions, I don't like it. — Dane Cook

When I'm looking for hot button answers to tough questions, I don't look to congressman or my mayor. I say, 'What would Miss U.S.A. have to say about this?' — Dane Cook

I'm completely ecstatic when a woman has own back story and brings something to the table and has a real strong kind of independence. — Dane Cook

I learned a long time ago that most of my family and friends had plastic hearts. Plastic hearts are made so they cannot be broken. Cracked maybe, but never broken. — Lisa De Jong

You can't become tempted if you just give in a little quicker. — Dane Cook

Vince Vaughn is a genuine person, awesome guy. He'll come to a lot of my shows. It's not that often that you can meet someone as cool as Vince. — Dane Cook

I say God bless you, I don't say bless you ... I am not the Lord, I can't do that. — Dane Cook

I don't know if there's any change more significant that a human being can make than that of a woman becoming a mother. There's no change more dramatic. — Eric Dane

Back to what? A guy who bails on you when you need him? What's Dane doing now that's more important than helping you? Fighting for the rights of endangered ferns?"
I stiffened and pushed away from him, irritation jolting me out of my fugue-state. "You have no right to judge Dane or my relationship with him."
Jack made a scoffing sound. "That half-assed excuse for a relationship was over the moment Dane told you not to bring the baby to Austin. You know what he should have said? ... 'Hell, yes, Ella, I'll stand by you no matter what you do. Shit happens. We'll make it work. Come home now and get in bed. — Lisa Kleypas

Ex-girlfriends will find themselves in my new routine. Sometimes they like that, and sometimes they definitely do not. But comedians should come with a giant warning or disclaimer: IF YOU DATE ME, IT WILL BE IN MY ACT. — Dane Cook

First of all, I was running scams when you were at keggers at Kappa Kappa Werewolf. You don't know much about me but I am way smarter than Gabriel was. I'm a consummate liar. I can street fight with the best of them and I can cheat at cards like nobody's business. This on top of my computer skills. I may not howl at the moon and have superhuman strength but I can hold my own. — Lauren Dane

They used to beat me up after Sunday School, I used to get beat up ... yeah, that's a nice little thank you from Jesus. — Dane Cook

if a man did have two masters he should despise one but be devoted to the other. — Dane Brown

There was no 'I' in team, but there was meat in team. And we were all dead meat. — Jennifer Lane

Life is a game I adore. I just wish someone had given me the rule book sooner. — Dane Waters

Rome had senators too, and that is why it declined. — Frank Dane

I'm always going to be someone that people enjoy watching. — Dane Cook

Goddammit, woman," Dane grumbled. "Why the hell can't you make it easy on me? Haven't I been through enough shit lately? — Nicole Edwards

What happened with Dane?" Jack asked casually. "Did you break up?"
"No, not at all. We're still together." I paused uncomfortably before adding, "But we're on ... hiatus. Just for three months, until Tara comes for her baby and I go back to Austin."
"Does that mean you're free to see other people?"
"We've always been free to see other people. Dane and I have an open relationship. No promises, no commitments."
"There is no such thing. A relationship is promises and commitments."
"To conventional people, maybe. But Dane and I believe you can't own someone."
"Sure you can," Jack said.
I raised my brows.
"Maybe it's different in Austin," Jack continued. "But in Houston, a dog doesn't share his bone."
-Jack & Ella — Lisa Kleypas

Sleep. I'm here to catch you. — Lauren Dane

My skin is very sensitive. — Eric Dane

I work with a lot of kids. Every year, for the past fifteen years, I work at Comedy Camp where I work with a lot of kids. — Dane Cook

For all her talk of being or so progressive and free ... all she really is is full of shit! — Lauren Dane

I love you enough to keep you from dying with me... ~ Dane de Falaise — Gayle Mullen Pace

There had been no one thing at which to point blame. The break-up was the accumulation of months of dissatisfaction. But if there was one thing that had tipped her over the edge, it was the toothpaste. — Lauren Dane

Hi, I'm a buck tooth and I like to be outside past the lips. — Dane Cook

Drive, ego and cocksureness are all essential elements in terms of getting exactly what you want but losing everything you've got. — Dane Cook

We never had a pool, right. So one summer, I remember. My dad, to make me happy. You know I was bummed out cause we didn't have the pool. So one summer he bought us this thing. It was yellow, you laid it on the lawn, sprayed it with the water, run across. Slip n' Slide. Yeah. Would have been fun if dad checked for rocks before he laid it down! Slip n' Bleed from the anus they should have called this ride. — Dane Cook

AGATHA, an old Labradoodle ATHENA, a brown teacup Poodle ATTICUS, an imposing Neapolitan Mastiff, with cascading jowls BELLA, a Great Dane, Athena's closest pack mate BENJY, a resourceful and conniving Beagle BOBBIE, an unfortunate Duck Toller DOUGIE, a Schnauzer, friend to Benjy FRICK, a Labrador Retriever FRACK, a Labrador Retriever, Frick's litter mate LYDIA, a Whippet and Weimaraner cross, tormented and nervous MAJNOUN, a black Poodle, briefly referred to as 'Lord Jim' or simply 'Jim' MAX, a mutt who detests poetry PRINCE, a mutt who composes poetry, also called Russell or Elvis RONALDINHO, a mutt who deplores the condescension of humans ROSIE, — Andre Alexis

Sometimes it takes some time out on your own to find your way back home. — Taylor Dane

I always thought that if I got no love at all early in my standup career, or I was god awful, I thought I'd get into psychology. — Dane Cook

The goal of astrology is the alchemy of personality. It is to transform chaos into cosmos, collective human nature into individual and creative personality. — Dane Rudhyar

I think that when you're playing someone who does really questionable or even really terrible things in a movie, it's important to show where that person is coming from. They're doing it from a necessary impulse. There is a struggle that's going on within them as a human. — Dane DeHaan

I'm interested in doing everything and anything that I can to squeeze that creativity out of my brain. I guess I'm sort of a performance rat. — Dane Cook

Start each day out the holy way..with Christ Chex, it's a miracle in a bowl. Just open the box and you hear AHHHHH ... and then a lil' angel flies out and says 'good morning, life is beautiful!'. — Dane Cook

The news of any politician's death should be listed under 'Public Improvements.' — Frank Dane

Sometimes, like we all do, I look at myself in the mirror. Sometimes I cry. Like a really hard cry like you just watch yourself cry but then you're done and you're just glowing and you're staring at yourself. — Dane Cook

It's not enough to picture their outward appearance. Give them a background and sphere of influence. — Jordan Dane