Cute Bar Quotes & Sayings

A cute girl, a pissed off Were-spider, and an occult boulnty hunter carrying a small arsenal walk into a bar ...
I bet this joke was gonna have one helluva punch line. — James R Tuck

I want steak," he said, stopping to look at her. "And shrimp. And lobster. And pancakes. And a candy bar".
"I'm sorry, you'll have to settle for a couple of sandwiches".
Thomas sighed."Figures". — James Dashner

It felt like an eternity before he gingerly lifted himself from the table and staggered backwards. Glass shards protruded from chest to groin. The guy looked like a bloody porcupine. A cute, tall bloody porcupine. I'm tall too. Five foot ten. But he had at least four inches on me, even with my thick-heeled boots.
"What's your name?" he slurred.
While visions of reckless homicide charges danced in my head, I contemplated using an alias. Finally, I said my real name, "Sam."
"Nice to meet you, Sammers. I'm Jake," he said. — Betsy Cook Speer

I don't think you want to know what it looked like."

"No. I do." I shifted my weight to my other foot. These heels were killing me.

Shaking his head, Seth sighed. "You were staring at him like an ugly chick stares at the last cute guy at the bar when they make the last call."

I choked on my laugh. "Oh. Wow. Thanks."

He raised his hands in a helpless gesture, which looked so strange for him. "I told you. — Jennifer L. Armentrout

And what did you want?"
His eyes sparkled with laughter. "I wanted to find the nearest bar and drink until I forgot a certain orphan with bewitching green eyes. I kept telling myself it was my Mori who wanted you, but the truth was, I noticed you before my demon did, and I wanted to see you again."
Warmth pooled in my stomach. "Would you do it differently now?"
"Yes."
"What would you do?"
"I'd do this."
I squealed as he swung me up over his shoulder and started striding back toward the waterfront. "Nikolas, put me down, you big lug!" I yelled through my laughter.
He patted my backside. "This time my Mori and I are in complete agreement."
"You do know I can zap your warrior ass, right?" I squirmed and he held me tighter.
His deep laugh warmed me to my toes. "But you won't."
"How do you know?"
"Because you like me... a lot. — Karen Lynch

I like animals that can kill me. I don't have a cat or a dog or anything - I'm not interested in animals because they're cute; I'm interested in animals that can kill me. My interests are with bears, tigers, lions, rhinos, elephants, hippos, things like that. I'm obsessed with big-game animals. Urban society, like New York, would be better if they released like 25 panthers in town. It would humble humanity. So when I'm walking home from the bar, I would always have to think to myself, 'There could be a panther around here. — Chuck Klosterman

Look, girls know when they're cute," he said. "You don't have to tell them. All they need to do is look in the mirror. I have one friend out in New York, an attorney. She moved out there after the school year to take the bar. She doesn't have a job. I was like, 'How are you going to get a job there in this market?' And she's like, 'I'll wink and I'll smile.' She's a pretty girl. Whether that works despite her poor grades is yet to be seen. — Daniel Amory

The first day back to school, you never want to wear your best outfit. You're setting the bar too high for yourself! Then the rest of the school year, you'll feel so much pressure! Wear something cute, but save your best outfit for a day when no one expects it. — Bethany Mota

Jason nodded. I'd be willing to give it a shot, although ideally, I would love to be out walking my dog and run into some cute guy walking his dog. Naturally that would lead to us talking. Then we'd start meeting in that same place every day, like little ten-minute dates. After weeks of this, maybe even months, we'd agree to meet without the dogs. Unchaperoned, so to speak. That would be romantic. Way more so than a party or a bar. — Jay Bell

Story of her life. The first cute guy she'd seen in what felt like ages and she met him at a dive bar located in another state hours away from where she lived. — Cat Johnson

A soap opera character on the bar TV says, "You killed him, you smothered him with doughnuts!" Another character, another scene--she is sitting in a room with a man and an elderly woman--the leas character wonders if she's dead. The man says, No, you're alive," and the other woman hands her a plate of doughnuts.
A commercial comes on. A couple are on a date and the woman's voice-over articulates interior thoughts of what a wonderful guy her friend has set her up with: "He's so cute, and his IQ is higher than my bank balance . . . but she didn't tell me he has . . . Tourette's syndrome. — David Byrne

People, heed my warning: That stuff is Specials Olympics in a pint glass. You think they are harmless and not very strong, and the next thing you know it is an hour later and you are in the bathroom of the bar with your pants off, surrounded by five girls, giving your boxers to a bachelorette party because one of the girls is cute and told you that you had a nice butt. Be forewarned.
- from the Austin Road Trip story — Tucker Max