Crap Coffee Quotes & Sayings

I don't know, Benes. I'm not sure I've ever really understood women for that kind of commitment.' He flipped his beer mat up int the air with his index finger and caught it in his hand. — F.C. Malby

They beat up on a weakling, and that's all they did. The rest is smoke-filled, coffee-house crap. They tortured and tormented a weaker kid. And it wasn't just that night. Read the letters, it was eight months. And you know what? I'll bet it was his whole life. They beat him up, and they killed him. And why? Because he couldn't run very fast. I'm off duty now, don't ask me to be pals with these guys. — Aaron Sorkin

Science fiction fans are awesome - they love you so much that they'll watch anything you do, even if it's complete crap. I never dreamed that I would go to conventions and sit down and have coffee with a Klingon. It's so weird, but it's my life. — Katee Sackhoff

I think all family businesses are difficult and fraught with problems because you have that family relationship to get over. But my dad has been so supportive, we've managed to work around that. — Nell Newman

In the real world, the tests are all open book. — Jeff Jarvis

It's a funny thing about Americans, we love to bitch about paying too much for the things we really need and are really a bargain, like gas and postage stamps, but we willingly shell out outrageous amounts for unnecessary crap like gourmet coffee and soap to make your crotch smell good. Two dollars a gallon to go ten miles is too much, but five to the parking valet to go ten feet is okay. — Bill Maher

I mean honestly, who just sits around in a house with a bunch of short guys waiting for their prince to come? So your mom is a bitch and wants to kill you because her mirror told her to? Cry me a river why don't you? Your big plan is sitting around cleaning house waiting for the other shoe to drop? And speaking of shoes, everyone has been picked on by mean girls. You do not wait for some old lady to pop in and transmogrify some innocent rodents just so you can sneak in to a dance under false pretenses. And let's say you do sneak in. For the love of all that is holy take your mask off and look the guy in the face and say. "Hi, I'm Cindy from down the street, I have this thing at midnight. Can we do coffee later?" This nonsense with a shoe and searching the entire village for one girl, it's crap. — John Goode

I swallowed and pushed my plate away. There were no more strawberries, and I was full. "Have you heard it?" I asked, settling back in my chair with my coffee. "I've heard it." Leaving a shallow wedge of waffle uneaten, Trent set his fork down and pushed it symbolically away. His hands went to his tea and he leaned back in his chair. I went to take a sip of coffee, freezing as I realized Trent had mirrored both my posture and my motion. Oh, crap. He likes me. Mirroring motions was classic in the body language of attraction. — Kim Harrison

And quit bringing up our forefathers and saying they were civil libertarians. Our founding fathers would have never tolerated any of this crap. For God's sake, they were blowing peoples' heads off because they put a tax on their breakfast beverage. And it wasn't even coffee. — Dennis Miller

Yes, I eat nothing but shit food and coffee. So what? Guys in my line of work, there's no retirement package. Sooner or later, the fatality rate was a hundred percent. My unofficial motto: eat crap food, bed beautiful women, and slaughter as many unholy sons-of-bitches of the Midnight as I can. Life is short. Insert your favorite slogan here. — Joey Ruff

I spied a copy of the novel Fifty Shades of Grey on the coffee table. "Haley, are you seriously reading that crap?" I gestured to the book with my glass. — T.B. Markinson

How wrong to think I was anyone else, like thinking grass stains make you a beautiful view, like getting kissed makes you kissable, like feeling warm makes you coffee, like liking movies makes you a director. How utterly incorrect to think it any other way, a box of crap is treasures, a boy smiling means it, a gentle moment is a life improved. — Daniel Handler

The midwest is full of these types of people. The nice enoughs but with a soul made of plastic. Easy to mold, easy to wipe down. The woman's entire music collection is formed from Pottery Barn compilations. Her books shelves are stocked with coffee table crap The Irish in America, Mizzou Football - A History in Pictures, We Remember 911, something dumb with kittens. I knew I needed a pliant friend for my plan, someone I could load up with awful stories about Nick. Someone who would become overly attached to me. Someone who would be easy to manipulate. Who wouldn't think to hard about anything I said because she felt privileged to hear it. — Gillian Flynn

Speed showering. Speed shaving. Speed dressing. Then it hit me. What a waste of energy. It was all for nothing. I was going to miss that meeting no matter what I did. I could be on the platform right now, waiting for the PATH train, and it would still be a no-go. I could be on the train, heading out of the station, and it still wouldn't work. So I took a minute for four or five gulps of too-hot coffee, which had already brewed on a timer. I wanted to call Sturgis and tell him I'd be late and I was sorry. But by then it was almost 8:35 a.m., and I thought it would be worse to interrupt his meeting. Crap. Crap. Crap. This was the worst. The absolute worst. The worst possible thing that could have happened to me. The job meant more to me than anything, than my own life, than the world. Why did I keep screwing up like this? — Catherine Ryan Hyde

Just then the Mustang made a loud clanking noise and started to vibrate. Hastily shoving his coffee in the drink holder, Alex peered down at the dashoard. None of the warning lights came on, But then with alarming speed the vibration got worse the car jolting back and forth.
Oh, you ancient piece of crap, — L.A. Weatherly

Peabody, why don't I have any damn coffee?"
"I don't know, sir, but I will rectify that immediately."
Peabody popped up, was actually humming under her breath as she programmed the AutoChef. And there was a bright look in her eyes when she carried the coffee to Eve.
"Eat any good pizza lately?" Eve muttered, and the light in Peabody's eyes turned instantly to embarrassed guilt.
"Maybe. Just a slice ... or two."
Eve leaned in. "Ate the whole damn pie, didn't you?"
"It was really good pizza. I sort of, you know, missed the taste of it."
"No more humming on duty."
Peabody squared her shoulders. "No, sir. All humming will cease immediately."
"And no sparkly-eye crap either," Eve added and yanked open the door to look for Louise.
"You can look pretty sparkly-eyed after really good pizza, too," Peabody muttered, then decided not to press her luck when Eve snarled. — J.D. Robb

take things like playfulness and purposelessness very seriously. . . . This is not meant to be light, but I think I would have somehow encouraged myself to let go a little bit more and hang in there and not pretend to know where this is all going. You don't need to know where it's all going. — Timothy Ferriss

What I want is Ceres Station or Earth or Mars. You know what they have in New York? All-night diners with greasy food and crap coffee. I want to live on a world with all-night diners. And racetracks. And instant-delivery Thai food made from something I haven't already eaten seven times in the last month. — James S.A. Corey

Madison: I got you a Starbucks coffee. It's better than the crap I make. We can heat it up in the microwave.
Kimm: Don't drink coffee.
Madison: Really? I can't live without it.
Kimm: Water in the morning, juice in the afternoon, herbal tea at night.
Madison: Any alcohol in there somewhere?
Kimm: Alcohol slows me down. So do tobacco and sugar. I've found that a healthy body creates a healthy mind.
Madison: Wish I could be that disciplined. It's not easy.
Kimm: Nothing worth having is easy. — Jackie Collins

Pray for me that I not loosen my grip on the hands of Jesus even under the guise of ministering to the poor. — Mother Teresa