Corniest Jokes Quotes & Sayings

I am myself. That is not enough. — Sylvia Plath

You've got her mad now and there's no turning back. All she has to do is go to the authorities, saying you molested her. Is that what you want? One little phone call and your life is ruined.'

'But I didn't do anything. I'm gay, remember?'

'That's not going to save you,' she said. 'Push comes to shove and who do you think they're going to believe, a nine-year-old girl or the full-grown man who gets his jollies carving little creatures out of balsa wood?'

'They're NOT little creatures!' I yelled. 'They're tool people! — David Sedaris

This was all given to me, he seemed to say. My body, my face, my height, my strength. I did not ask for it, I did not make it, I did not build it. I did not fight for it. This is a gift, for which I say my daily thanks as I wash and comb my hair, a gift I do not abuse or think of again as I go through my day. I am not proud of it, nor am I humbled by it. It does not make me arrogant or vain, but neither does it make me falsely modest or meek. — Paullina Simons

Nothing commends a radical change to an Englishman more than the belief that it is really conservative. — H.A.L. Fisher

Markets help people pursue their happiness more efficiently and effectively. Because they are so effective, markets provide benefits right here and right now, even while government is busy batching the protection of happiness. — Joel Miller

Two wrongs don't make a right, but don't three lefts make a right? Two wrongs don't make a right, but don't two negatives make a positive? — Andrew Clements

Poetry is the honey of all flowers, the quintessence of all sciences, the marrow of wit, and the very phrase of angels. — Thomas Nashe