Congress By Will Rogers Quotes & Sayings

The difference between death and taxes is death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets. — Will Rogers

This stuff they are talking here in Congress costs the people of the United States $44 a page. That's beside what it costs to ship it to the asylums where it's read. — Will Rogers

If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress. — Will Rogers

This session of Congress is also to relieve the farmer again, relieve him of any encouragement that he might have received during the last one. — Will Rogers

With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke. — Will Rogers

We all joke about Congress but we can't improve on them. Have you noticed that no matter who we elect, he is just as bad as the one he replaces? — Will Rogers

See where Congress passed a two billion dollar bill to relieve bankers' mistakes. You can always count on us helping those who have lost part of their fortune, but our whole history records nary a case where the loan was for the man who had absolutely nothing. Our theory is to help only those who can get along, even if they don't get a loan. — Will Rogers

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of Congress? — Will Rogers

Hurray! Congress is to adjourn! Only four more days of Congressional burglary on the Treasury! — Will Rogers

If we took Congress seriously, we would be worrying all the time. — Will Rogers

When I make a joke, nobody gets injured ... when Congress makes a joke, it's the law. — Will Rogers

Congress is going to start tinkering with the Ten Commandments just as soon as they find someone in Washington who has read them. — Will Rogers

A senator got up today in Congress and called his fellow senators sons of wild jackasses. Now, if you think the senators were hot, imagine how the jackasses must feel. — Will Rogers

We cuss Congress, and we joke about 'em, but they are all good fellows at heart, and if they wasn't in Congress, why, they would be doing something else against us that might be even worse. — Will Rogers

The budget is like a mythical bean bag. Congress votes mythical beans into it, then reaches in and tries to pull real ones out. — Will Rogers

Congress meets tomorrow morning. Let us all pray: Oh Lord, give us strength to bear that which is about to be inflicted upon us. Be merciful with them, oh Lord, for they know not what they're doing. Amen. — Will Rogers

Congress is deadlocked and can't act. — Will Rogers

Intelligence is playing a more important role in policymaker decisions than I think I've ever seen in my time in Congress or before. — Mike Rogers

Borrowing money on what's called 'easy terms,' is a one-way ticket to the Poor House. If you think it ain't a Sucker Game, why is your Banker the richest man in your Town? Why is your Bank the biggest and finest building in your Town? Instead of passing Bills to make borrowing easy, if Congress had passed a Bill that no Person could borrow a cent of Money from any other person, they would have gone down in History as committing the greatest bit of Legislation in the World. — Will Rogers

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. — Will Rogers

Congress knew Coolidge would veto the farm bill. There was more politics than relief in that bill. — Will Rogers

Congress didn't vote on the bills, they just wave at them as they go by. — Will Rogers

Charles Lathrop Pack, president of the American Tree Association, told how Rogers gave him advice in handling an educational campaign in tree planting.
'Will Rogers told me,' said Pack, 'that I was on the wrong track in trying to educate people to the value of putting idle land to work growing trees. "Pack," he said, "you go down to Washington and get Congress to pass a law prohibiting tree planting and you'll have everybody doing it in a week. — P.J. O'Brien

A president just can't make much showing against congress. They lay awake nights, thinking up things to be against the president on. — Will Rogers

The US is safest when Congress is in recess. — Will Rogers

And kid Congress and the Senate, dont scold em. They are just children thats never grown up. They dont like to be corrected in company. Dont send messages to em, send candy. — Will Rogers

Farmers, get out your sense of humor. Congress meets to relieve you again next week. — Will Rogers

You could transfer Congress over to run Standard Oil or General Motors, and they would have both things bankrupt in two years. — Will Rogers

We have the best Congress that money can buy. — Will Rogers

Labor Day, I suppose set by an Act of Congress. Everything we do nowadays is either by, or against, Acts of Congress. How Congress knew anything about Labor is beyond us. — Will Rogers

Our president delivered his State of the Union message to Congress. That is one of the things his contract calls for
to tell congress the condition of the country. This message, as I say, is to Congress. The rest of the people know the condition of the country, for they live in it, but Congress has no idea what is going on in America, so the president has to tell 'em. — Will Rogers

Lobbyists have more offices in Washington than the President. You see, the President only tells Congress what they should do. Lobbyists tell'em what they will do. — Will Rogers