Competition Funny Quotes & Sayings

I think that the habit of gloomy poetry is very funny. It's like a special competition in losing. — Miroslav Holub

Keep your faith in all things hidden. We believe in the stars when we cannot see them. We believe in the sun when it no longer shines for us. And we believe in the universal truth even when it is not shown clearly. — Hilary Thompson

I am sure,
Though you can guess what temperance should be,
You know not what it is. — William Shakespeare

Myrtle goggled at them.
"You're alive," she said blankly to Harry.
"There's no need to sound so disappointed," he said grimly ...
"Oh, well ... I'd just be thinking ... if you had died, you'd have been welcome to share my toilet," said Myrtle, blushing silver.
"Urgh!" said Ron ... "Harry! I think Myrtle's grown fond of you! You've got competition, Ginny! — J.K. Rowling

In Milwaukee last month a man died laughing over one of his own jokes. That's what makes it so tough for us outsiders. We have to fight home competition. — Robert Benchley

A dozen swimming events have already been completed in the Olympic competition. I wonder where they got the name 'Speedo.' It doesn't sound like a bathing suit, it sounds like a breakfast cereal for meth addicts. — Craig Ferguson

We ignore outlooks and forecasts ... we're lousy at it and we admit it ... everyone else is lousy too, but most people won't admit it. — Martin J. Whitman

The belief that women should control our own bodies may be a majority belief, but the minority that believes otherwise is against not only safe and legal abortions but contraception and even sex education. — Gloria Steinem

Nothing amuses people more than a cocky guy who starts losing. — Criss Jami

In all that people can do for themselves, government ought not to interfere. — Abraham Lincoln

Tell me she doesn't have her hand in his back pocket. That is so lame."
"I don't care," I tell her, easing any worries she might have about me being upset. "If they want to date, all the more power to them."
She's only doing it because she wants everything you had. It's a competition thing with her. First taking your position on the squad, now putting her claws into Colin. Next thing you know she'll want to change her name to Brittany."
"Very funny."
"You say that now," she says, then moves in close and whispers, "it won't be so funny if she wants Alex next."
"Now that's not funny. — Simone Elkeles

When I'm working in the real world with real women and we're shopping, we find that fashion seems to end when you get any larger than a size 12. How ridiculous is that? — Tim Gunn

Agreed," I say. "It's going to be a long hour."
"Maybe not that long," says Peeta." what was that you were saying just before the food arrived? Something about me ... no competition ... best thing that ever happened to you ... "
" I don't remember that last part," I say, hoping it's too dim in here for the cameras to pick up my blush.
" Oh, that's right. That's what I was thinking," he says " Scoot over, I'm freezing. — Suzanne Collins

If there were an international butt competition, Eric would win, hands down - or cheeks up. — Charlaine Harris

You should not bring more items and hurdles to the obstacle course. — Anne Lamott

We [me and my husband] both had our things. Seth was the artist, I was the singer. We were like "You do your thing, I'll do my thing and never the two shall meet." I think we had a healthy competition going through our childhood. But I sort of left the funny stuff to him, I said "You're the comedian, you're the jokester, you do that I'll be the more serious one." You need that kind of balance in the family. — Rachael MacFarlane

I think it's funny because on 'Glee Project,' there's that added pressure, but with 'Glee,' there's no element of competition. No one's trying to dance better than anyone. But there's that added pressure of, 'So many people are going to watch 'Glee' this week. If I don't nail this dance, I look like an idiot.' — Samuel Larsen

It's never happened in the World Series competition, and it still hasn't. — Yogi Berra

All women are basically in competition with each other for a handful of eligible men. — Mignon McLaughlin

Humor is the oxygen of children's literature. There's a lot of competition for children's time, but even kids who hate to read want to read a funny book. — Sid Fleischman

[Lizzie Bennington to a reporter who has asked for her opinion about Jack Archer's celebrated thighs.] When you come back from a set down and bring the match to a final set tiebreak and are a point away from winning the match, only to have what looks like an extremely fit player call a time out because of a cramp and then watch that player sit back and casually converse and laugh while you do your best to keep your mental focus and your body moving so you don't grow cold and cramp yourself, I hardly think you'd concern yourself with his burgeoning manhood, let alone his thighs! — A.G. Starling