Comedy Absurd Quotes & Sayings

You always miss 100% of the shots you don't order — Josh Stern

About half the scripts sent to me feature characters I just can't identify with, particularly one-dimensional businessmen or, if it's a comedy, some absurd 10-year-old Japanese stereotype, some role related to IT or business ... There's no point in getting mad about it; it's just the way things are. — Ken Watanabe

I despise Wednesdays! They are the Marquis de Sade of the work week. Wednesday are so awful that...wait..what? It's Thurs? (face-palm) — L.G.A. McIntyre

That voice that cries out doesn't have to be a weakling's does it? — John Osborne

I know time fly's Hell I'll be dead before I know it ... — Stanley Victor Paskavich

If you're playing things sincere in a really absurd, heightened situation, you'll achieve comedy as opposed to just saying funny lines and one-liners and stuff. — Jeff Baena

Comedy is serious - deadly serious. Never, never try to be funny! The actors must be serious. Only the situation must be absurd. Funny is in the writing, not in the performing. If the situation isn't absurd, no amount of joke will help. — Mel Brooks

I think good comedy is a commitment to the absurd in that the situation for the actors should be virtually played like a drama. — Peter Billingsley

The bounties of space, of infinite outwardness, were three: empty heroics, low comedy, and pointless death. — Kurt Vonnegut

Manners without sincerity, is called polite society — Josh Stern

Here in this supreme menace of the will, there approaches a
redeeming, healing, enchantress - art. She alone can turn these
thoughts of repulsion at the horror and absurdity of existence into
ideas compatible with life: these are the sublime - the taming of
horror through art; and comedy - the artistic release from the
repellence of the absurd. — Friedrich Nietzsche

Again let us dream where the land lies sunny And live, like the bees, on our hearts' old honey, Away from the world that slaves for money
Come, journey the way with me. — Madison Cawein

I like gross generalizations ... I also like disgusting specifics! — Josh Stern

There's always someone we'd love to kill, the trick is to make it not look like an accident — Josh Stern

I know for sure,to be a leader i have to be a reader — Faiz Triumph

I love the absurd - kind of absurdist comedy, absurd things in life. — Rose McGowan

In my banjo show with the Steep Canyon Rangers, I do do comedy during that show. It'd be absurd just to stand there mute and play 25 banjo songs. — Steve Martin

Frederica tells the park-keepers that Lufra is a purebred "Barcelona collie".
Alverstoke catches on and says "No, Frederica! I TOLD you
it is a HOUND, from Baluchistan!"
She: "Oh, you might have mentioned it was from ASIA! Very remote; the dog had to be smuggled out because the natives were hostile. — Georgette Heyer

My religion and my patriotism derived from my religion, embrace all life. — Mahatma Gandhi

As anyone who has experienced it will know, war is many contradictory things. There is brutality and heroism, comedy and tragedy, friendship, hate, love and boredom. War is absurd yet fundamental, despicable yet beguiling, unfair yet with its own strange logic. Rarely are people 'back home' exposed to these contradictions - society tends only to highlight those qualities it needs, to construct its own particular narrative. — Tim Hetherington

I've turned arrogance into an artform, where it's so absurd that it becomes comedy. But I've never done anything to hurt anybody or steal from anyone. — John Lydon

If you don't fall down now and again, it just means the training wheels are working — Josh Stern

[On Dr. Strangelove]: My idea of doing it as a nightmare comedy came in the early weeks of working on the screenplay. [...] What could be more absurd than the very idea of two mega powers willing to wipe out all human life because of an accident, spiced up by political differences that will seem as meaningless to people a hundred years from now as the theological conflicts of the Middle Ages appear to us today? — Stanley Kubrick

W. Kamau Bell is in the vanguard of a new era of American comedy for an unsettling, troubling, and strangely hopeful time. Firmly in the fearless tradition of Mort Sahl, Lenny Bruce, Richard Pryor, & Chris Rock. Comedy as common sense purged of the absurd hypocrisy that is Our America. — Vernon Reid

When I was a kid watching comedians on TV and listening to their records they were the only ones that could make it all seem okay. They seemed to cut through the bullshit and disarm fears and horror by being clever and funny. I don't think I could have survived my childhood without watching stand-up comics. When I started doing comedy I didn't understand show business. I just wanted to be a comedian. Now, after twenty-five years of doing stand-up and the last two years of having long conversations with over two hundred comics I can honestly say they are some of the most thoughtful, philosophical, open-minded, sensitive, insightful, talented, self-centred, neurotic, compulsive, angry, fucked-up, sweet, creative people in the world. — Marc Maron

One thing I'm a big fan of is the theater of the absurd. That's what I come from, that's what I love to do more than anything. What I love about absurdity is the words "comedy" and "drama" get thrown out the window and it's just life, which is absurd. — Michael Shannon

The only way I'd ever die of a broken heart, is if I slammed into something really hard — Josh Stern

In comedy, something may be more absurd, but you have to believe just as much as you do when you're doing drama. — Jenna Elfman

If you see the light at the end
of the tunnel, you're looking
through binoculars the wrong
way — Josh Stern

If you feel irritated by the absurd remarks of two people whose conversation you happen to overhear, you should imagine that you are listening to a dialogue of two fools in a comedy. — Arthur Schopenhauer

When you take a character seriously, there's more room for comedy because you're not aware of how absurd you are. — Robin McLeavy

I really like the stuff that is very absurd and very real at the same time. I think Anton Chekhov is the greatest comedy writer of all time. I think he would make a great addition to The Office staff. If you look through Chekhov plays there is a lot of awkward pauses in there. His mixture of pathos, absurdity, truthfulness and whimsy is just mixed together perfectly. — Rainn Wilson

Christmas Day is the festival of optimism. — Helen Keller

The old Ivy feared parental reaction from each tiny act of defiance. But the new Ivy says, "Fuck 'em all!" a sentiment that Rachel will surely appreciate. My new motto? Be who you are and own that shit-because only with true self-acceptance comes peace and joy. — B.L. Berry

Women are aroused by the strangest things, like a rock going through their bedroom window — Josh Stern