Chuck Palahniuk Damned Quotes & Sayings

All my characters exist in risk, in the places we are either too afraid to go to, or have enough privilege not to have to, but whatever the reason, these characters I fashion go before us and come back transformed for us. For me, at least. — Chris Abani

How miserably hypocritical, you might say, but no sooner am I offered a chance to flee Hell than I yearn to stay. Few families hold their relations as closely as do prisons. Few marriages sustain the high level of passion that exists between criminals and those who seek to bring them to justice. It's no wonder the Zodiac Killer flirted so relentlessly with the police. Or that Jack the Ripper courted and baited detectives with his - or her - coy letters. We all wish to be pursued. We all long to be desired. — Chuck Palahniuk

All the demons of Hell formerly reigned as gods in previous cultures. No it's not fair, but one man's god is another man's devil. As each subsequent civilization became a dominant power, among its first acts was to depose and demonize whoever the previous culture had worshipped. The Jews attacked Belial, the god of the Babylonians. The Christians banished Pan and Loki anda Mars, the respective deities of the ancient Greeks and Celts and Romans. The Anglican British banned belief in the Australian aboriginal spirits known as the Mimi. Satan is depicted with cloven hooves because Pan had them, and he carries a pitchfork based on the trident carried by Neptune. As each deity was deposed, it was relegated to Hell. For gods so long accustomed to receiving tribute and loving attention, of course this status shift put them into a foul mood. — Chuck Palahniuk

Hope is something really tough and tenacious you have to give up. It's an addiction to break. — Chuck Palahniuk

Actors are steeped in a world of agents and where the next job is coming from and what are their expenses and what is the hotel like. You want to take them out of that world and dump them into another world, so that when you meet them on the screen they don't seem like the guy who was in two others movies that year. — Danny Boyle

The way his jeans hugged his cheeks drew me to him and made me feel warm. — Kristen Tracy

According to Babette, 98.3 percent of lawyers end up in Hell. That's in contrast to the 23 percent of farmers who are eternally damned. Some 45 percent of retail business owners are Hellbound, and 85 percent of computer software writers. Perhaps a trace number of politicians ascend to Heaven, but statistically speaking, 100 percent of them are cast into the fiery pit. As are essentially 100 percent of journalists and redheads. — Chuck Palahniuk

Because every desire has its proper object ... people spend their lives wanting things the shouldn't. The world confuses them into taking heir love and aiming it where it doesn't belong ... All it takes to be happy is to love the right things, in the right amounts. Not money. Not books. People. Adults who don't understand that never feel fulfilled ... — Ian Caldwell

You've thrown down the gauntlet. You've brought my wrath down upon your house. Now, to prove that I exist I must kill you. As the child outlives the father, so must the character bury the author. If you are, in fact, my continuing author, then killing you will end my existence as well. Small loss. Such a life, as your puppet, is not worth living.
But ... If I destroy you and your dreck script, and I still exist ... then my existence will be glorious, for I will become my own master. — Chuck Palahniuk

The meanest girl who dances and dresses becomes something higher when her children look up into her face and ask her questions. It is the only education we have and which they cannot take from us — Olive Schreiner

Tell me about him... please. — Nalini Singh

Help me give up my addiction to Hope. — Chuck Palahniuk

Make your pain productive and you can transform tragedy into triumph. — Jaeda DeWalt

This is the upside of already being eternally damned — Chuck Palahniuk

Therefore, when we neglect to fear such a brittle monstrosity, we render it powerless. — Chuck Palahniuk

Don't be too ambitious. Do the most important thing you can think of doing every year and then your career will take care of itself. — Henry Kissinger

No, it's not fair, but what makes earth feel like Hell is our expectation that it should feel like Heaven. Earth is earth. Dead is dead. You'll find out for yourself soon enough. It won't help the situation for you to get all upset. — Chuck Palahniuk

,dying seems like the greatest weakness, and in a world where people say you're lazy for not shaving your legs, then being dead seems like the ultimate character flaw.
Chapter I. — Chuck Palahniuk

So Scheherazade began. — Anonymous

The Husband Manifesto:

I will be a better father.
I will be a better husband.
I will be a better leader.
I will be a better servant.
I will be a better man.

I will esteem my wife in front of my friends.
I will praise my wife before my family.
I will honor my wife as I honor my mother.
I will put a smile on her every day.
I will plant a kiss on her each day.
I will listen to her even when I don't feel like it.
I will love her even when I don't feel like it.
I will treat her better than I treat myself.
I will treat her as God would. — Matshona Dhliwayo

I cross my fingers that if a demon dunks me in a vat of boiling lava I'll get thrown together naked with River Phoenix, and that he'll say I'm cute and try to kiss me. — Chuck Palahniuk

Leadership is about taking charge and influencing others to follow your vision. It's about going against the odds and accepting responsibility for the outcomes along the way — Robin Crow

Undecided thoughts' is called the mind. 'Decided thoughts' is called the intellect. — Dada Bhagwan

We have to put in our time every day to try and achieve and learn so that we can develop our talents and each of you, thank goodness, have special talents; each of you are special persons. — Bruce Vento

Besides.
Eternity was going to seem like forever.
With the crowds of smiling people smiling at me in the dark, me who spent my life cleaning bathrooms and mowing the lawn, I told myself, why rush anything?
I'd backslid before, I'd backslide again. Practice makes perfect.
If you could call it that.
I figured, a few more sins would help round out my resume.
This is the upside of already being eternally damned.
I figured, Hell could wait. — Chuck Palahniuk

What makes the earth feel like hell is our expectation that it ought to feel like heaven. Earth is earth. Hell is hell. Now, stop with the whining and caterwauling. — Chuck Palahniuk

They placed their bets with such self righteous bravado, but I'm the one who lost. — Chuck Palahniuk

My hips bristle with totems and talismans, proof that I am not simply a character in a fixed book or film. I am no single narrative. As neither Rebecca de Winter nor Jane Eyre, I am free to revise my story, to reinvent myself, my world, at any given moment. Advancing beside Archer, I am resplendent in my savage finery of seized power. In my service charge the collected blackguards of a dozen tyrants now dispatched to a lesser oblivion. My fingers, stained crimson with the blood of despots, are not the fingers which paged through the paper lives of helpless romantic heroines. No more am I a passive damsel who waits for circumstance to decide her fate; now have I become the scalawag, the swashbuckler, the Heathcliff of my dreams bent on rescuing myself. For now do I embody all the traits I had so hoped to find in Goran. Meaning: No longer am I limited. — Chuck Palahniuk