Caps With Funny Quotes & Sayings

When you try to do something ten per cent better, you tend to work from where you are: if I ask you to make a car that goes 50 miles a gallon, you can just retool the engine you already have. — Astro Teller

The plowing's done. The seed is spread. The weather is reminding me that, rain or shine, the earth abides, the land endures, the soil will persevere forever and a day. Its smell is pungent and high-seasoned. This is happiness. — Jim Crace

Take from a man his reputation for probity, and the more shrewd and clever he is, the more hated and mistrusted he becomes. — Marcus Tullius Cicero

The trick, though, is to not lose compassion, to not allow the sense of absurdity to outweigh the awareness of real beings, with real feelings. Mean-spirited humor turns the world into cardboard, the way Midas's simple-minded greed turned food into inedible and useless stuff. — Jane Hirshfield

Every time you think of doing some charity, you think there is some beggar to take your charity. If you say, "O Lord, let the world be full of charitable people!" - you mean, let the world be full of beggars also. Let the world be full of good works - let the world be full of misery. This is out-and-out slavishness! — Swami Vivekananda

Men who are going bald often wear baseball caps. — Rita Rudner

This Plantagenet king comes from the devil. — Edward Rutherfurd

If she kept wondering about how much of her life Bran engineered, she'd end up on a funny farm knitting caps for ducks. — Patricia Briggs

It really puzzles me to see marijuana connected with narcotics dope and all of that stuff. It is a thousand times better than whiskey. It is an assistant and a friend. — Louis Armstrong

It is a fact that under equal conditions, large-scale battles and whole wars are won by troops which have a strong will for victory, clear goals before them, high moral standards, and devotion to the banner under which they go into battle. — Georgy Zhukov

I was a twenty-one-year-old virgin with literary aspirations. — Stephen King

The contempt which men feel for the prostitute, and the fact that they have always regarded themselves as far superior to her, even when they made use of her, suggests an attempt to rationalize the situation; it might be explained as an unconscious transference to the woman of the shame they feel for themselves in these relations. — Alison Roberta Noble Neilans

A lot of times we associate Greenpeace and climate change and shrinking polar caps with heavy-handed, weighty material. It's somber stuff. But with Funny Or Die we thought we could put an interesting take on it. Make it a little more palatable, especially for young people who tune into the website. — Alexander Skarsgard

Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need. — Will Rogers

I stand at the altar of murdered men, and, while I live, I fight their cause. — Florence Nightingale

Dylan: What was that? Is Brooke breaking shit now? I know she's upset but she needs to remember where she is,Joey.HANDLE IT.

Sweet Christ. Why couldn,t she be on bed rest at her mother's?

Me: Ease up on the shouty caps,cupcake. Everything is under control.

Dylan:BETTER BE.(I love you)

Me: BITCH.(love you too) — J. Daniels

Love was love.
But she hoped that he was not a dragon. — Laini Taylor

On visioning: In visioning, you're not using your limited perception of life to manifest. You're using your mind for the purpose it was actually created - as an avenue of awareness, a receiving station to pick up the divine ideas being broadcast everywhere. And once you catch this vision, it doesn't just manifest, it changes you, stretches you, transforming you into a person who can handle the higher vibration and larger manifestation. You don't just get the new Mercedes, you get Mercedes Consciousness. You become the change you want to see. — Derek Rydall

I couldn't have invented crisps ... I don't really want to be known as the man who invented crisps ... I invented apples ... I invented pandas, and caps. I invented soil. — Noel Fielding