Calculator Quotes & Sayings

I get verklempt if I see a vintage TI-30 or TI-54 calculator. But I don't think I'd want to use one. — Douglas Coupland

People think that the arts are optional and they aren't. They teach a level of emotional depth that's equally important to mathematic skill. You can replace some math skills with a calculator if you know how to operate the thing, but there's no calculator for human interaction. — Hal Sparks

Here Katy. I have a cooler trick than Finn's. I can show you how to write poop on a calculator . . . now that's awesome." I pulled the calculator from her little hands and proceeded to teach her some potty humor every kid should know.
Finn grabbed it from my hand and punched in some numbers and passed it back. When I turned it upside down it read "hILLBILLI." Well, I definitely was that. — Amy Harmon

I love math and was a math teacher for many years, so it was fun for me to write several math books, including 'Fraction Fun,' 'Calculator Riddles,' and 'Shape Up!' 'Fun with Triangles and Other Polygons.' — David A. Adler

Look, this is a man, he's got great numbers. He talks about numbers. I'm beginning to think not only did he invent the Internet, but he invented the calculator. It's fuzzy math. It's a scaring - trying to scare people in the voting booth. Under my tax plan, that he continues to criticize, I set a third - the federal government should take no more than a third of anybody's check. — George W. Bush

The calculation of ignorance is too great for any calculator, only someone who has experienced bliss and genuine ignorance can determine valid or not, not those whom of which scrutinize it — Aaron Ozee

I wanted to be an archaeologist. But in school you have to take a tremendous amount of statistics for that, and I am not good at statistics. So I hit a real wall with archaeology. It's probably like wanting to be an architect - you think it's all fun and games, and then you have to get out a calculator and you're done. — Sloane Crosley

People challenge my nerd cred all the time. I just show them the photo of me winning my middle-school science fair, wearing my Casio calculator watch and eyeglasses so big they look like they can see the future. — Aisha Tyler

Joining the Liberal Party was a no-brainer for me ... And when you are a young man, you don't get a calculator out saying, 'Am I going to get to power?' You get propelled forward by idealism. — Nick Clegg

No story shows more clearly Jesus' utter disregard of human privilege - disregard, not antipathy or distaste. He is swayed neither by Jairus's prominence nor by the woman's poverty, but by the faith and desperate need of each one. Jesus is not a strategic political calculator, currying favor with the local leaders; nor is he a revolutionary, ostentatiously undercutting the powerful. He is a restorer of daughters, known and unknown, socially central and socially marginal. And while he is indifferent to human power, he is so exquisitely aware of his own power to restore health (which is simply another way to say flourishing image bearing) that the slightest faithful brush with his cloak brings him to a halt, not content to have power flow anonymously and disconnectedly, searching out relationship with the ones who seek him. — Andy Crouch

One corner was filled by an elderly flat-top desk; the papers on it were neatly in order. Near it, on its own stand, was a small electric calculator. — Robert A. Heinlein

If it's the thought that counts, then ignorance must use a calculator — Josh Stern

We don't design by calculator or by demographics or anything like that. We really are a group of creative, sensitive people. We have our charmed little world where we get to make things. We're really lucky. — Marc Jacobs

I'm always crunching numbers, so my calculator watch is a must. — David Neeleman

From the time I was 7, when I purchased my first calculator, I was fascinated by the idea of a machine that could compute things. — Michael Dell

[ ... ]he also had a device which looked rather like a largish electronic calculator. This had about a hundred tiny flat press buttons and a screen about four inches square on which any one of a million "pages" could be summoned at a moment's notice. It looked
insanely complicated, and this was one of the reasons why the snug plastic cover it fitted into had the words
Don't Panic printed on it in large friendly letters. The other reason was that this device was in fact that most
remarkable of all books ever to come out of the great publishing corporations of Ursa Minor - The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy. The reason why it was published in the form of a micro sub meson electronic component is that if it were printed in normal book form, an interstellar hitch hiker would require several inconveniently large buildings to carry it around in. — Douglas Adams

I can't read a computer screen and never use a calculator. It's all in my head and by hand. — Simon Reuben

Deep Blue didn't win by being smarter than a human; it won by being millions of times faster than a human. Deep Blue had no intuition. An expert human player looks at a board position and immediately sees what areas of play are most likely to be fruitful or dangerous, whereas a computer has no innate sense of what is important and must explore many more options. Deep Blue also had no sense of the history of the game, and didn't know anything about its opponent. It played chess yet didn't understand chess, in the same way a calculator performs arithmetic bud doesn't understand mathematics. — Jeff Hawkins

I can count all the lovers I've had on one hand ... if I'm holding a calculator. — Sebastian Horsley

See, there's the pie chart. If you look, you can see clear as day that the happy times -- the times when you think "How fun! I'm glad I'm alive" -- don't make up even one tenth of life. I'm work this out properly with a calculator, so there's no mistake. — Tatsuhiko Takimoto

Listen, twenty years ago, it wasn't so cool to have a calculator watch, right? And spending all day inside playing with your calculator watch sent a clear message that you weren't doing so well socially. And judgments like 'like' and 'dislike' and 'smiles' and 'frowns' were limited to junior high. Someone would write a note and it would say, 'Do you like unicorns and stickers?' and you'd say, 'Yeah, I like unicorns and stickers! Smile!' That kind of thing. But now it's not just junior high kids who do it, it's everyone, and it seems to me sometimes I've entered some inverted zone, some mirror world where the dorkiest shit in the world is completely dominant. The world has dorkified itself. — Dave Eggers

I am so old, I entered engineering school with a slide rule. And I left engineering school with a calculator. I can still use a slide rule but it's not a skill you especially need anymore. — Bill Nye

Fighting emotion with logic is like bringing a calculator to a knife fight — Josh Sundquist

He also had a device that looked rather like a largish electronic calculator. This had about a hundred tiny flat press buttons and a screen about four inches square on which any one of a million "pages" could be summoned at a moment's notice. — Douglas Adams

I imagine I sow cuttings of Anna-Louise's hair, like the fine stems of dried flowers, and watch sunflowers grow from the cuttings. I imagine I bury a pocket calculator with liquid crystals spelling her name, then watch the earth shoot forth lightning bolts. 'We should open up a seafood house together,' Anna-Louise says when she wants to torture me. Now that's love. — Douglas Coupland

The Googleplex Star Thinker is a super-computer from the Seventh Galaxy of Light and Ingenuity and has the ability to calculate the trajectory of every single dust particle during a five-week Dangrabad Beta sand blizzard.
The Deep Thought computer call it a pocket calculator in comparison to itself. — Douglas Adams

It's easy to underestimate how profound and holistic Roddenberry's vision of the techscape of the future was. By today's standards, the available technology of 1964 was downright primitive. Doors did not open automatically when we approached them. The first handheld calculator was still in the future, as were microwave ovens and cell phones. 1964 was a year before most Americans had even heard of a place called Vietnam, five years before man walked on the moon, 25 years before anyone ever surfed the Internet. Your phone had a curly cord, and the new innovation of "touchtone" dialing was merely a year old. Even the television sets that viewers watched would be considered positively prehistoric today. Most TVs were black-and-white models, and the majority of those sets had no remote control. There was no cable or satellite; rabbit ears and roof-top antennas were the norm. The world looked, and was, different. — Marc Cushman

There are those who believe knowledge is something that is acquired - a precious ore hacked, as it were, from the grey strata of ignorance.
There are those who believe that knowledge can only be recalled, that there was some Golden Age in the distant past when everything was known and the stones fitted together so you could hardly put a knife between them, you know, and it's obvious they had flying machines, right, because of the way the earthworks can only be seen from above, yeah? and there's this museum I read about where they found a pocket calculator under the altar of this ancient temple, you know what I'm saying? but the government hushed it up ...
Mustrum Ridcully believed that knowledge could be acquired by shouting at people, and was endeavouring to do so. — Terry Pratchett

Saying you don't need a librarian because you have the internet is like saying you don't need a math teacher because you have a calculator. — Unknown

Never mind that. What's going on with you and Heath?"
Annabelle pulled a little wide-eyed innocence out of her rusty bag of college acting skills.
"What do you mean? Business."
"Don't give me that. We've been friends too long."
She switched to a furrowed brow. "He's my most important client. You know how much this means to me."
Molly wasn't buying it. "I've seen the way you look at him. Like he was a slot machine with triple sevens tattooed on his forehead. If you fall in love with him, I swear I'll never speak to
you again."
Annabelle nearly choked. She'd known Molly would be suspicious, but she hadn't expected an outright confrontation. "Are you nuts? Setting aside the fact that he treats me like a flunky, I'd never fall for a workaholic after what I've had to go through with my family." Falling in lust, however, was an entirely different matter.
"He has a calculator for a heart," Molly said.
"I thought you liked him. — Susan Elizabeth Phillips

Get the paper quick, maybe it's there ... I read the paper with my eyes (that's not mistake: My eyes are like a pen now, or a calculator, something you hold in your hands, something you feel is not you- a tool). — Yevgeny Zamyatin

A good counter needs no calculator. — Laozi

There's like ten minutes when it's like, 'Okay, wait, who is this guy again?' And then, you know, I just put on the calculator watch and the glasses, and just be all, you know, inappropriate. And then it just works out fine. — Rainn Wilson

Harriet van Horne He makes love to me expertly, mechanically, coldly ... He's pressing all my buttons, as if I were a pocket calculator. — Erica Jong

Hand over the calculator, friends don't let friends derive drunk. — Various

It is unworthy of excellent men to lose hours like slaves in the labour of calculation which could safely be relegated to anyone else if machines were used.
(Describing, in 1685, the value to astronomers of the hand-cranked calculating machine he had invented in 1673.) — Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz

Do I get any kind of training?"
"Do you know how to use a basic calculator?"
I roll my eyes "Yes."
"Consider yourself trained. — Colleen Hoover

But real-world questions aren't like word problems. A real-world problem is something like "Has the recession and its aftermath been especially bad for women in the workforce, and if so, to what extent is this the result of Obama administration policies?" Your calculator doesn't have a button for this. Because in order to give a sensible answer, you need to know more than just numbers. What shape do the job-loss curves for men and women have in a typical recession? Was this recession notably different in that respect? What kind of jobs are disproportionately held by women, and what decisions has Obama made that affect that sector of the economy? It's only after you've started to formulate these questions that you take out the calculator. But at that point the real mental work is already finished. Dividing one number by another is mere computation; figuring out what you should divide by what is mathematics. — Jordan Ellenberg

If you want to improve your self-worth, stop giving other people the calculator. — Tim Fargo

But, I added, duBois had found no evidence of any malfeasance. She'd spoken to dozens of officers and administrators within the department, armed with her pen and calculator. What Westerfield and Teasley had found, the money shifting from one account to another, seemed to duBois to be innocent. — Jeffery Deaver

Before you open the lunch menu or order that cheeseburger or consider eating the cake with the frosting intact, haul out the psychic calculator and start tinkering with the budget. — Caroline Knapp

A businessman is a hybrid of a dancer and a calculator. — Paul Valery

A good calculator does not need artificial aids. — Laozi

Some of the girls in the factory say that I have ice water in my veins. That I don't have feelings. That there's a calculator where my heart ought to be. A calculator! I shit on them. Por Dios! I consider myself practical, sensible, and realistic. That's the way I am, and if you don't like it, don't come around. Don't come crying to me. — Eduardo Santiago

You know what happens when you give a kid a calculator instead of teaching him math?"
"I think you need my help." I cross my arms. "You know what happens when you give a kid a calculator instead of teaching him math?"
He tilts his head, his eyes fetchingly bright.
"Sure he can do math that way," I continue, "but then if you take the calculator from him, suddenly he can't do any math at all, because he's
learned to rely on the calculator. Your power lets you look at people and see exactly what it takes to make them tick. Or crumble. But without
your power, you don't get people. — Carolyn Crane

Value investing is at its core the marriage of a contrarian streak and a calculator. — Seth Klarman

Kate studied the clipboard and the pocket calculator on the floor.
"Did you figure out how to work that thing?"
"You don't have to be a CPA to use a calculator."
"I meant the clipboard."
"Ha ha. — Nora Roberts

One does not learn computing by using a hand calculator, but one can forget arithmetic. Perlis 1982 — Alan J. Perlis

When things don't add up, either you don't have a calculator or you forgot to use commonsense by simply asking. — Shannon L. Alder

Look, this island is an attempt to re-create a natural environment from the past. To make an isolated world where extinct creatures roam freely. Correct?" "Yes." "But from my point of view, such an undertaking is impossible. The mathematics are so self-evident that they don't need to be calculated. It's rather like my asking you whether, on a billion dollars in income, you had to pay tax. You wouldn't need to pull out your calculator to check. You'd know tax was owed. And, similarly, I know overwhelmingly that one cannot successfully duplicate nature in this way, or hope to isolate it. — Michael Crichton

I accidentally brought my graphing calculator camping. — Ian Anderson

No Geologist worth anything is permanently bound to a desk or laboratory, but the charming notion that true science can only be based on unbiased observation of nature in the raw is mythology. Creative work, in geology and anywhere else, is interaction and synthesis: half-baked ideas from a bar room, rocks in the field, chains of thought from lonely walks, numbers squeezed from rocks in a laboratory, numbers from a calculator riveted to a desk, fancy equipment usually malfunctioning on expensive ships, cheap equipment in the human cranium, arguments before a road cut. — Stephen Jay Gould

Uh-oh," Moni sang, and nodded her head in Chantal's direction. "I think someone's a wee bit upset with us." She turned and walked a few steps backward.
"Careful," I said. "We're not out of range."
"Have no fear, Super Brain is here." Moni whipped out her calculator, holding it up like a shield.
"What are you going to do, daze her with denominators?"
"Maybe. But first I'm going to pummel her with my Pythagorean theorem. — Charity Tahmaseb

Speaking of human computers, there is a guy named Art Benjamin, he's a human calculator. He says it's a skill he learned as a kid. Now he's a math professor at Harvey Mudd. He can find the square root of a six digit number in a few seconds. Practice. — Bill Nye

Sundance Supply has a neat material calculator and free greenhouse designs-Great Prices! — Shane Smith

A lot of people... use a calculator! — Joe Strummer

People say I talk slowly. I talk in a way sometimes called laconic. The phone rings, I answer, and people ask if they've woken me up. I lose my way in the middle of sentences, leaving people hanging for minutes. I have no control over it. I'll be talking, and will be interested in what I'm saying, but then someone - I'm convinced this what happens - someone - and I wish I knew who, because I would have words for this person - for a short time, borrows my head. Like a battery is borrowed from a calculator to power a remote control, someone, always, is borrowing my head. — Dave Eggers

Why's it okay to draw spaceships if you're seven, but not okay to draw diabolical mazes? Who decides that spending money on Space Invaders is fine, but if you buy a calculator with loads of symbols you're asking to be picked on? Why's it okay to listen to the Top 40 on Radio 1 but not okay to listen to stations in other languages? — David Mitchell

Lasting companies know how to reinvent themselves. Hewlett-Packard had done that repeatedly; it started as an instrument company, then became a calculator company, then a computer company. Apple has been sidelined by Microsoft in the PC business. You've got to reinvent the company to do some other thing, like other consumer products or devices. You've got to be like a butterfly and have a metamorphosis. — Walter Isaacson

One who scorns the power of intuition will never rise above the ranks of journeyman calculator. — Albert Einstein

Yet we can be sure that whatever fictions exist in Wall Street bookkeeping, the earth is a faithful scribe, a faultless calculator, a superb bookkeeper; we will be held responsible for every bit of our economic folly. — Thomas Berry

The uniform has a hundred pockets, big flat pockets for deliveries and eensy narrow pockets for gear, pockets sewn into sleeves, thighs, shins. The equipment stuck into these multifarious pockets tends to be small, tricky, lightweight: pens, markers, penlights, penknives, lock picks, bar-code scanners, flares, screwdrivers, Liquid Knuckles, bundy stunners, and lightsticks. A calculator is stuck upside-down to her right thigh, doubling as a taxi meter and a stopwatch. On — Neal Stephenson

I guess personally I really like "Take on Me" by Aha. I think it just defines the 80s and how insane it was and like neon and like calculator watches and that whole thing. — Evan Peters

What's Julie's number?"
Curran glanced at me.
"Julie's fluctuating between thirty-two and thirty-four units. Her shift coefficient is six point five and she's been at it for sixteen hours."
Dear God, I'd need a damn calculator. — Ilona Andrews

I use minimal software to make my music - a wav editor and a calculator for my beats to make sure everything falls on mathematical precision. If you were just mapping this out visually, it works by math. I guess it's slightly engineering influenced. — Girl Talk

Information Theory would inform a mechanical calculator in much the same way as, say, fluid dynamics would inform the hull of a ship. — Neal Stephenson

A five-week sand blizzard?" said Deep Thought haughtily. "You ask this of me who have contemplated the very vectors of the atoms in the Big Bang itself? Molest me not with this pocket calculator stuff. — Douglas Adams

Nanny Piggins lost the Vegetable Peeling, Gutter Cleaning, and Long Division Explaining tests as well. She got caught telling Michael, 'Don't bother to learn that. Long division is a waste of brain space, when you can just buy a calculator.' Which is only the truth. — R.A. Spratt

First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with ASCII - and we thought it was a typewriter. Then we discovered graphics, and we thought it was a television. With the World Wide Web, we've realized it's a brochure. — Douglas Adams

I've always said to myself that if a little pocket calculator can do it why shouldn't I? — Roald Dahl

In the midst of this chopping sea of civilized life, such are the clouds and storms and quicksands and thousand-and-one items to be allowed for, that a man has to live, if he would not founder and go to the bottom and not make his port at all, by dead reckoning, and he must be a great calculator indeed who succeeds. Simplify, simplify. — Henry David Thoreau

Scorecards are common in the political process, but they are inappropriate in the judicial process. The most important tools in the judicial confirmation process are not litmus paper and a calculator. — Orrin Hatch

Come back down here, heat supply," I commanded. "I'm going to close my eyes and you are
going to tell me about math so I can fall asleep. Tell me some theorems. Is that what you called them?
Tell me how Einstein knew e equals mc squared. And start with once upon a time ... okay?"
"You're a little bossy, you know that?"
"I know. I have to be. It's to make up for not being born with a calculator. Now share your wisdom,
Infinity."
"Once upon a time - "
I giggled and Finn immediately shushed me, continuing on with his "story. — Amy Harmon

The hedonistic conception of man is that of a lightning calculator of pleasures and pains, who oscillates like a homogeneous globule of desire of happiness under the impulse of stimuli that shift him about the area but leave him intact ...
He is an isolated, definitive human datum, in stable equilibrium except for the buffets of the impinging forces that displace him in one direction or another. Self-poised in elemental space, he spins symmetrically about his own spiritual axis until the parallelogram of forces bears down on him, whereupon he follows he line of the resultant — Thorstein Veblen

I sold my most valuable possession, but I knew that because I worked at Hewlett Packard, I could buy the next model calculator the very next month for a lower price than I sold the older one for! — Steve Wozniak

Ava, when a man gets a calculator out at the end of a meal to work out what you owe. It's usually not a good sign. — Jodi Ellen Malpas

fact, all the other war news was almost disregarded and the population had no way of getting any other news reports, since radios were unavailable. My Russian boss, for whom I prepared all the lists and bread ration cards, was a blond, slim Northerner from Leningrad. When sober, he was distant and quite proper; but when he was drunk, one had a hard time fighting him off. He was very demanding and we were forever writing. In the entire section there was not a single typewriter. Everything was written longhand. The bookkeepers were using the abacus, the only available calculator. — Pearl Fichman

Bill Frindall has done a bit of mental arithmetic with a calculator — John Arlott

We need to recalibrate our scale and remove our colored lenses,so we can start from the zero-point.This reminds me of using a calculator to make a series of calculations. When calculating multiple sets of numbers, you have to clear the previous calaulation before you start a new one, and that is what we want:a fresh start. — Ilchi Lee

A solid 70 percent of houses guessed that I was dressed as a fancy pimp. Whatever - I still got candy. Molly went as a calculator. So, anyway, that was the Halloween I dressed as A Source of Concern to My Family. — Dave Holmes