Bowel Movement Quotes & Sayings

I who was a house full of bowel movement,
I who was a defaced altar,
I who wanted to crawl toward God
could not move nor eat bread. — Anne Sexton

That's why I'm not on social media. People are way too open about their private lives. I don't need to see pictures of what somebody had for lunch or hear about how difficult their last bowel movement was or see on a map where they were when either one happened. — Janet Evanovich

Excitement is the drunkenness of the spirits. Only calm waters reflect heaven in their bosom. — Margaret Of Valois

The atonement of Christ is not just for those who sin. The mercy of Christ encompasses all pain. — Boyd K. Packer

The recipe for great art has always been misery and a good bowel movement. — Don Roff

When people start talking about their bowel movements, they are inexorable as the processes of which they speak. — William S. Burroughs

Sex is interesting, but it's not totally important. I mean it's not even as important (physically) as excretion. A man can go seventy years without a piece of ass, but he can die in a week without a bowel movement. — Charles Bukowski

An elderly camper realizes, with heart-skipping dismay, that during his afternoon bowel movement, he is unwittingly shitting on a zombie. — Robert Kirkman

He saw Kathleen sitting in the middle of a long white table alone.Immediately things changed. As he walked toward her the people shrank back against the walls till they were only murals; the white table lengthened and became an altar where the priestess sat alone. Vitality welled up in him and he could have stood a long time across the table from her, looking and smiling. — F Scott Fitzgerald

In my teens my drug of choice was acceptance, in my twenties it was approval, in my thirties it was love, in my forties it was Scotch. That lasted a while,' she admitted. 'Now all I really crave is a good bowel movement. — Louise Penny

Most of the time you will fail, but you will also occasionally succeed. Those occasional successes make all the hard work and sacrifice worthwhile. — Dean Kamen

The United States Postal Service is the world's most efficient postal system. — Diane Watson

Some of life's best moments are during a good bowel movement, and to have that robbed from you, I can't even imagine. — Chuck Wendig

There's three things in this world that you need: Respect for all kinds of life, a nice bowel movement on a regular basis, and a navy blazer. — Robin Williams

So, he eagerly drove from Basel to Bayreuth before the festival began to watch the last rehearsals of The Ring Cycle. As he watched, it hit him like Odin's bowel movement: the opera was shit. — Dylan Callens

A good story is like a good bowel movement: it's only really satisfying once it's ended, because if you just keep going eventually your body runs out of shit and moves on to pushing all your internal organs out your sphincter until only a foul smelling shell remains and anyone who wants to get into your incredibly long poo gets turned off because they have to go through all the poo up until that point to have the necessary context. — Yahtzee Croshaw

Why be uptight about bowel movements and sex? We all have sex. We all have penises
except for those of us who have vaginas. — Howard Stern

To the unwashed public, Joan Collins is a star. But to those who know her, she's a commodity who would sell her own bowel movement. — Anthony Newley

Is a decent bowel movement too much to ask for? — Nick Wilgus

I dont care what your race is. Or what your fandom is, or what your Sexual preference is.
The Fact is i still hate everyone. — Me

Please do not say magic like you are discussing a bowel movement ... Humanity expects the lights, so they are provided. — Thomm Quackenbush

Hemorrhoids can bleed, typically after a bowel movement, producing blood-streaked stool or toilet paper, .. The blood may turn water in the toilet bowl red. However, the amount of blood is usually small, and hemorrhoids rarely lead to severe blood loss or anemia. — Alfred The Great

Then he leans back in his chair, pressing his hands together like he's having an intellectual bowel movement, his brows seriously furrowed. — J. Lincoln Fenn

Eyes the broad-shouldered faceless character that symbolizes Men's Room, does Sternberg, and struggles with himself. He's needed a bowel movement for hours, and since the LordAloft 7:10 lifted things have gotten critical. He tried, back at O'Hare. But he was unable to, because he was afraid to, afraid that Mark, who has the look of someone who never just has to, might enter the rest room and see Sternberg's shoes under a stall door and know that he, Sternberg, was having a bowel movement in that stall, infer that Sternberg had bowels, and thus organs, and thus a body. Like many Americans of his generation in this awkwardest of post-Imperial decades, an age suspended between exhaustion and replenishment, between input too ordinary to process and input too intense to bear, Sternberg is deeply ambivalent about being embodied; an informing fear that, were he really just an organism, he'd be nothing more than an ism of his organs. — David Foster Wallace

You're gonna die. You're gonna die. And nobody's gonna care which version of the iPhone you used to make something on Twitter, or to go and post about your bowel movement on Facebook. And I'm not even talking about legacy; I'm talking about the fact that I personally feel most alive when I'm making something, and I feel least alive when I'm being led around by some obnoxious use of my attention that I wasn't aware of. To me, that's the thing. You can buy the jogging shoes and you can buy the Runner's World, but until you put them on and walk out the door every day, you're just a fat man. — Merlin Mann

suffer from fissures after childbirth. Either way, for those who suffer from anal fissure, it can be a dreaded feeling to kick-start the day with painful stools. Anal fissures are caused by trauma to the anus and anal canal. The cause usually is overwrought bowel movement or constipation Many individuals can report the exact bowel movement during which their pain began Constipation, especially the passage of hard stools, can lead to overstretching of the delicate anal lining, causing a tear Surface tears heal quickly by themselves, if proper care is taken, whereas deep tears take a longer time. The latter occurs because of a spasm in the anal opening - primarily due to decreased — Mukesh Batra

To be honest, bread constipates me, and I like to have my daily bowel movement. — Jessica Simpson

First coffee, then a bowel movement. Then the Muse joins me. — Gore Vidal

We've seen the reality of Saddam's regime: his thugs prepared to kill their own people, the parading of prisoners of war and now the release of those pictures of executed British soldiers. — Tony Blair