Bizzaro Quotes & Sayings

I write pretty fast, probably faster than most people. But I might think about something for six hours, then write it in 20 minutes. So did I write for six hours and 20 minutes, or just 20 minutes? I used to write absolutely every day, except for days when I had to travel or something. — Chuck Klosterman

Three days ago, I was fired from my job teaching at a college because one of my students
bet me that you don't cum when you get a prostate exam and it took me seven minutes
to prove that dumb fucking kid wrong. It was hard to touch my own prostate, but
ultimately, I was correct. I came onto the floor and onto the person in the desk up front.
I said, "Kids, that is what is known as 'empirical evidence'. — Sam Pink

His intuition was luminous from the instant you met him. So was his intelligence. A lot of actors act intelligent, but Philip was the real thing: a shining, artistic polymath with an intelligence that came at you like a pair of headlights and enveloped you from the moment he grabbed your hand, put a huge arm round your neck and shoved a cheek against yours; or if the mood took him, hugged you to him like a big, pudgy schoolboy, then stood and beamed at you while he took stock of the effect. (About Philip Seymour Hoffman) — John Le Carre

It must be murder to be an aging beauty, a former Tadzio, to see your future as an ignored spectator rushing up to meet you like the hard pavement. What a small sip of gall to be able to time with each passing year the ever-shorter interval in which someone's eyes focus upon you. And then shift away. — David Rakoff

So what do you do?' she asked. 'I sneak around at night, well, usually at night, and gather coins out of fountains', I said slowly, watching her face for judgement. She burst into laughter. 'Like spare change? You collect people's wishes? And you spend them on yourself?' 'They're not wishes' I said. 'They lose their symbolism once they hit corporate water. At that time they either become extra income for people who don't need it, or they can help me get along in the world. — Caris O'Malley

I like offending people, because I think people who get offended should be offended. — Linus Torvalds

Just because he likes the same bizzaro crap as you doesn't mean he's your soul mate. — Rachel Hansen

[he]. . . hated God . . . actually, he just hated Christians . . . He never met God. Why should he care about somebody he never met? — Carlton Mellick III

Nothing in the world is certain except for death and taxes. — Benjamin Franklin