Quotes & Sayings About Asmodeus

We have certain demons who are motivated by the smell of food. They tend to get rather violent whenever they smell it. I personally wouldn't be caught eating anything because I would end up dead. You might not. But you'd still have to fight them, and since some of them are rather ugly and really, really smelly, it might spoil your appetite. Then again, maybe not. Doesn't spoil Noir's. I think it makes him hungrier, especially when he guts them. Sick, but true. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I told you not to piss off Noir. One day you're going to listen to me. (Asmodeus)
Why start now? (Jaden)
Ah, you're right. Bled so much now, it doesn't really matter, does it? (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Here we are. Maybe I should warn you before we enter ... (Asmodeus) (Jericho stepped past him and threw open the door.) Or maybe not. Let's just barge in and be surprised, shall we? (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Take this. (Jericho)
(He slid the ring off his finger and handed it to him.)
I'm not about to marry your ugly ass, boy. No offense, but you ain't my type. I like my dates with less body hair ... and with female parts attached by nature. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Technical advisor. Since you know our enemies so well, we're going to pick your brain. (Jericho)
I'll tell you what you want to know. There's no need to torture me for it. (Asmodeus)
Pick your brain is an idiomatic expression, Asmodeus. It means we'll have you tell us things. We're not actually going in there to mess with your head. (Delphine)
Oh, thank the Source. I can't stand it when someone opens my skull. It really hurts. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

If I'm not back in a few hours ... well, I don't want to think about that. I might change my mind about doing this. I'm thinking happy thoughts. Creamed dog innards and rotten steak. Yeah. Yum! (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Get us into Azmodea. (Jericho)
Why in the name of smelly feet would you want to go there again?! (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Greetings, half blood. You have gained power, I see. Asmodeus will be pleased." "Asmodeus can go fuck himself. — Pippa DaCosta

Jericho stopped him before he left. He slid the ring off his finger and handed it to him. "Take this."
Asmodeus curled his lip as he shrank back from it. "I'm not about to marry your ugly ass, boy. No offense, but you ain't my type. I like my dates with less body hair ... and with female parts attached by nature."
Jericho let out an aggravated growl. "It's not a wedding ring, asshole. It's Berith's ring. You get into trouble you can summon him to help you get out of there."
That completely changed his attitude. "Oh, hey, that could be worth an engagement to you." Asmodeus grinned as he palmed it. "If I'm back in a few hours ... well, I don't want to think about that. I might change my mind about doing this. I'm thinking happy thoughts. Creamed dog innards and rotten steak. Yeah. Yum." He vanished. — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Hmmm. Odd. Okay." He took Nick's hand.
Nick pulled back. "Dude, don't touch me."
"Why not?"
Why not? Really? He had to explain stranger-danger and personal space? Where did this guy live that he didn't understand grabbing another dude's body parts without an invitation was a first class ticket to a major butt-whipping event.
"Look, I don't know you, and we're not dating. So keep your hands off me."
Again with the annoyed noise. "Then how can I lead you if I can't touch you when you can't see?"
"How 'bout you don't lead me anywhere?" Nick was beginning to like the darkness. Unlike Asmodeus, it was quiet and rather peaceful. And it definitely didn't give him a headache.
"But you said you couldn't see."
Nick was aghast at the way this guy's mind worked. "That doesn't mean you can touch me."
"I'm so confused. — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Are you always this random? (Jericho)
Mostly. It really irritates Noir. Which is just an added bonus for me. At least so long as I can outrun him. (Asmodeus)
Add me to that list of people you annoy. (Jericho)
Oh. You're not going to singe my testicles over it, are you?! (Asmodeus)
No plans to. (Jericho)
Good. We can be friends, then. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

How long have you been here? (Jericho)
Don't know. Again, tried to count once, got depressed so I stopped. I find it easier to just go with the flow. Ease with the peas. (Asmodeus)
Ease with the peas? (Jericho)
Yeah, that's not a happy memory, either. Let's forget I mentioned it. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I want you to show him to Zeth and the rest of the Olympian dogs who fight for us. (Noir)
Anything else, Master? Lick your boots? Wipe your ass? (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Where are we? (Jericho)
Noir's happy place. It's where he brings the beings he wants to play with. (Asmodeus)
Punish. (Jericho)
You say ta-mah-to. I say to-mah-to. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Asmodeus! You don't see her, do you hear me? (Jericho) Completely blind, Minor Master. Hearing is intact. Is there anyone here besides the two of us? No? Good. I'm leaving now unless Minor Master has another preferably nonpainful task for me. (Asmodeus) You're dismissed. (Jericho) Cool beaners. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

How many demons and people are enslaved here? (Jericho)
Define slavery. (Asmodeus)
Kept against their will. (Jericho)
Good definition. Counting me? (Asmodeus)
Why not? (Jericho)
Probably a couple of million ... you know it's really hard to count to a million, plus they're always dying and new ones are coming in. I tried to count once, but it got really depressing so I stopped. The constant adding and subtracting. Not my forte, really. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

What are you doing here? (Delphine)
Being counted among friends. But for the record, you guys better not lose. I don't want my ass fried over this, or any other body parts, either. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

You're the half-sister of the full-blood demon, Valenti. The illegitimate child of Asmodeus - one of the Seven Princes of Hell. You were sold at birth as a plaything for lesser demons."
"A half-blood abomination," he snarled. "An embarrassment to demons everywhere. By all rights, you should be dead. — Pippa DaCosta

I have noticed that what cats most appreciate in a human being is not the ability to produce food - which they take for granted - but his or her entertainment value. Asmodeus took to his toy enthusiastically. In another week he permitted me to stroke him, producing a raucous purr, but, in order to save his face, pretending to be asleep. — Geoffrey Household

Oh, hello, me lovely, we haven't met. Asmodeus, demon extraordinaire, at your service. Any service you may require, especially those that involve nudity and adjoining body parts joining other people's body parts. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

Even Asmodeus, that limping devil who looked through rooftops at men's most secret actions, could not have told which of these thoughts masked an undercurrent of joy -- the joy of the man who know that he has killed wisely and well. — Anthony Boucher

You rang, Mino- well, you're not really the Minor Master anymore, are you? What should I call you? (Asmodeus) Think of a polite term, demon. (Jericho) Mister Master it is. What can I do for you? (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I think they're having trouble adjusting to the emotions they have outside of their dreams. At any rate, they keep acting like demented teenagers from a porno version of a John Hughes film. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon

I have attempted to give you a glimpse ... of what there may be of soul in chemistry. But it may have been in vain. Perchance the chemist is already damned and the guardian of the pearly gates had decreed that of all the black arts, chemistry is the blackest. But if the chemist has lost his soul, he will not have lost his courage and as he descends into the inferno, sees the rows of glowing furnaces and sniffs the homey fumes of brimstone, he will call out:
Asmodeus, hand me a test tube. — G.N.Lewis

Why would you help us? (Delphine) I hear stupidity is a fatal disease. Doing my own experimentation to see if that's true or not. If I survive, we'll know it's not. If I die ... well, it'll suck. Bad. And I won't be happy. (Asmodeus) — Sherrilyn Kenyon