Ashlan Quotes & Sayings

I was going to be an Abby-flavored Lunchables, split three ways. — Ashlan Thomas

Stepping out of the kitchen, Ben glared at him. "I have no problem kicking your ass."

"I'm sure there are a lot of things you like to do with asses. — Ashlan Thomas

Will there be anything else? Want to know my blood type? Time of the month? Social security number?"
Thinking that over, I nodded. "And your astrological sign would be helpful."
"If you want to know any of that about me, it's time you get a hobby. Maybe start a navel fluff collection, take up extreme ironing, or dress like a pirate."
"I'd make a damn fine pirate. — Ashlan Thomas

You're gonna need a lot more than prayers, kid. — Ashlan Thomas

No, I'm quite certain. And for the past two hundred years, I've dreamed of nothing but your lips. I would wait another two hundred years if you demanded, and I would spend every minute of every waking hour, begging you for my sweet relief. — Ashlan Thomas

I was turning into one of those ABC Afterschool Specials that we were forced to watch as kids. — Ashlan Thomas

I shouldn't get a thrill out of seeing her upset, but when her nose crinkled that way and her eyes heated, I couldn't help but getting turned on. — Ashlan Thomas

Her head swung around as if it had become detached from her spine. "My God! Your brother is HOT!"
Calista shook her head and looped an arm around the woman's waist. "Yes, he is. I'll be sure to tell my family you thought so."
"It doesn't count when they're drunk. House rule," I complained. — Ashlan Thomas

This was it. I had front row seats to the beginning of Xander and Danielle. Tonight, he would kiss her if he hadn't already. Groping would ensue, and then removal of their clothes because they were in the way of the groping. Lips would be all over each other, hands touching parts only touched in private. Her blonde hair would spread over him as they moved like that in bed. Oh, they were going to have sex! The way they were dancing, they wouldn't even make it to a bed; it would be down in the fish room. Those poor fish wouldn't know it was coming, still happily sucking down their stinky flakes. They would scare the fish! — Ashlan Thomas

You're the only reason I exist. — Ashlan Thomas

Third person, really? That's so sixteen hundreds. — Ashlan Thomas

I knew it was coming. That question. It was like he had a freaking daily quota to hit. — Ashlan Thomas

You will feel the burning of Hell from inside your skin, itching and painful like writhing worms burrowing into your bones. You cannot escape it, you cannot beg your way out. A day here is a hundred there. Your dirty soul will feed Lucifer and the greater demons around him for eternity. You can't be anything more than a slave. — Ashlan Thomas

Everything faded away except one emotion. One so pure and innocent that it seemed intangible. I was encompassed and filled with a sensation that was consuming, warming me throughout. There was a word that was the closest thing to describe it, but the gravity he held of it was so much more than a word could possibly convey. He saw everything I was to God, to this world, to his own heart. Our souls were entwined with it, our destinies written by it, our hearts beat to it.
Love. — Ashlan Thomas

I want you to be my wife, I want you to have my children, and I want to build a life with you. This is the face I want to wake up to until my heart gives out. — Ashlan Thomas

I am pretty impressive. — Ashlan Thomas

He looked like Heaven, and he would soon be all mine. — Ashlan Thomas

His golden eyes flashed wickedness and promise. "As you wish. — Ashlan Thomas

It's just a shirt. I have no emotional connection to it or the band. I just didn't feel like coming to work topless today."
Camden's hand slammed down on the counter. "Shit, are there days that you come topless? I would like to make sure I'm here for that. — Ashlan Thomas

What was wrong with these angels tonight? Did they eat bad manna or something? — Ashlan Thomas

I know. I must be pretty spectacular. — Ashlan Thomas

You don't know how special you are, Abby, and you truly don't get how special you are to me. I would move Heaven for you. — Ashlan Thomas

My grin tipped up on one side. "I'm sorry. Who asked about the television screens in my truck?"
Her lush lips thinned. "And how long did it take you to pick out the watermelon? Thirty minutes?"
"Twenty-nine," I shot back. "And it's the best fucking watermelon I've ever had. Worth every minute."
A single brow quirked. "You want a medal?"
I leaned over the counter and she met my stare. I wasn't sure what was happening, but it seemed like the air cracked with electricity, heating my skin, quickening my pulse. This couldn't be normal. Maybe I was getting sick. I'd overheated in all of the seventy-eight degrees outside. Yeah, that had to be it.
"I'd love one."
It was so fast, I almost missed it. Her gaze dipped to my mouth before dropping to the island again. "There isn't any more room on your shelf for one more medal."
"I'll just put up another shelf."
"I'm sure you would. — Ashlan Thomas

The girl was a walking heartache and there was no doubt she could break what little of me there was left. — Ashlan Thomas

I have to keep up appearances. I do roll with angels now. — Ashlan Thomas

Did you know your dancing is atrocious? I seriously think there is something wrong with your inner ear. No other human moves so unnaturally to music. — Ashlan Thomas

I love you, my Abby, above all else, know this. I would give up everything for a life together. Heaven could never compare to you. — Ashlan Thomas

Her pain was too much to bear. Fighting back my own tears, I wanted to pull away from her, but I stayed to endure the anguish I had caused her. It was only fair. — Ashlan Thomas

I swore with his newfound love of bathing, I would see Isaac in human clothes next. If he started wearing skinny jeans, I would have to intervene. — Ashlan Thomas

I welcomed the blackness to take me, swallow my soul, for I was unworthy of His Gifts. He knew all along and punished us for our arrogance. I deserved Hell. I deserved to be dragged into a chasm of eternal pain. — Ashlan Thomas

A hand was on my chest, under my clothing. The hand was hot, large, and definitely touching more than anyone without a medical degree had ever touched. — Ashlan Thomas

Always one to accept a compliment graciously, Wright. — Ashlan Thomas

Oh, I liked the beard. It covered more of your face. — Ashlan Thomas

Flinging myself against the headrest, I glared at his knees thinking how I would like to ram his kneecaps with the Explorer. He'd probably just dent the damn metal. After a groan that I meant to be obnoxiously loud because he couldn't see my eye roll, I threw the gear back into drive. He was such a sneaky angel. — Ashlan Thomas

It was then I realized that all men really were the same. It was only a matter of time before they revealed the dragon within. — Ashlan Thomas

The good news is my almost-boyfriend was ready to pound Eric's face for you."
"Almost-boyfriend? Don't you gays usually move a lot faster than this? I thought you were supposed to shack up together on the second date and adopt a cat so you had something to dress up in a tutu. — Ashlan Thomas

I brought you to a remote mountain to take advantage of you.'
Tightening his hold around me, he rumbled, 'I wasn't complaining. — Ashlan Thomas

Well, I found I am my own best company. I don't annoy myself and I always have something important I want to hear myself say. — Ashlan Thomas

Okay, I'll admit, I want to kiss you like that again, every single day, every moment I'm with you. — Ashlan Thomas

Good God!" Lids sliding closed, he moaned. I think I was witnessing a foodgasm and it was far too similar to another gasm I never wanted to hear from my father.
I should avert my eyes. This shit would scar me. — Ashlan Thomas

I am speaking English, correct? I ask because sometimes I speak another language without meaning to. — Ashlan Thomas

I was held together by one thread that was black and frayed, and the end of it was tied to Maggie. She had unwittingly pulled on it, loosening the already loose knitting until I was nothing more than a pile of tangled string, completely unraveled. — Ashlan Thomas

Are you trying to cram the whole week into her mouth right now? Don't your tongues ever get tired? — Ashlan Thomas

I wasn't all that sure God existed because there was no explaining why He hated me so much. It wasn't as though He'd learned not to like me; it was more like one of those insta-hates that only intensified without any reason. And He loved screwing me over. Like it was His favorite pastime or something. Like He really had nothing else better to do than fuck with my life. Just when I thought there wasn't one more obstacle He could throw my way, He proved me wrong.
More than God loved screwing me over, He really loved proving me wrong. — Ashlan Thomas

The second issue, which was a big one, her hands shook like she had DTs. I was tempted to go to the liquor store and get her a bottle of Jack to calm her down. The rest of her body was completely still except at the wrists. Strangest thing I'd ever seen.
Vibrators for hands. — Ashlan Thomas

You've taken my heart, Abby. It's yours. — Ashlan Thomas

Leaning back, she studied me, knuckles brushing along my jaw. "You've turned into a man overnight, it seems. Just yesterday, this face was three years old with a samurai turtle Band-Aid on your cheek."
"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Mom. Way more awesome than samurais."
"You're right. Ninjas have masks and nut chucks."
Any other time I would have laughed. "Nunchakus."
"I know, but you definitely did some damage to your nuts that I think you should get checked out before you have children. I meant to tell you years ago. — Ashlan Thomas

I've had my eye on the Invisible Woman all night. — Ashlan Thomas

Strange that I knew it would end this way. Not in battle, but in a dirty alley, alone, hiding among the filth like the coward I was.
My poetic ending. — Ashlan Thomas

I wanted to do whatever was necessary to encourage your short dresses.'
I nodded. 'My legs and butt thank you.'
A wry grin slid over his lips. 'They are most welcome. — Ashlan Thomas

My apologies. To kiss you now was inappropriate. But gladly, I would kiss you again. — Ashlan Thomas

Having to do something is an obligation, a duty, a will that is not your own. Wanting to do something is a choice that requires heart, desire, a will that is yours. Those two concepts are a universe apart. I wanted to, Abby — Ashlan Thomas

You are the missing piece to make me human. I feel it, coursing through me. I have no doubts. You were made for me, we were meant to be one. — Ashlan Thomas

Good. How about you find the balls that are attached to your dicks, draw them out of your abdominal cavity and show me."
"You want to see our testicles, Coach?" Mike asked, making his way backward down his ladder.
"Maybe when I find my magnifying glass, Mr. Brown! I won't be able to tell the difference between what you call testicles and raisins."
Mike gasped for air. "My balls are sweeter, sir!"
Lids narrowed over his black marbles. "Glad to know how flexible you are, Mr. Brown. That'll come in handy for the rest of my practice." Watkins added with a growl, "If you are still alive. — Ashlan Thomas

I'm only sensitive in the area that counts, Sticks."
"The soft spot on your skull that never hardened? — Ashlan Thomas

She had no idea how much I wanted to make her my wife, no clue as to how many nights I fell asleep with that image on my mind. — Ashlan Thomas

Don't let this go to your head, but I missed your face. — Ashlan Thomas

His first stretch alerted me to a concerning issue. "Um, Raphael, I think you should change."
Biceps bulged, thigh muscles popped, and I was fairly certain he just added another pack to his abs. "I am quite comfortable, Abigail Miller."
I crossed my arms. "Well, I'm not. I know you go commando under your skirt and I don't want to see angel parts I wasn't meant to see."
He shot me a sideways glance. "You have seen said angel parts on Alexander. Mine are much more impressive, however."
My mouth and eyes widened. "Oh my gosh! I cannot believe you said that, Raphael. And it was an accident!"
He continued to stare.
"I was bleeding to death!"
He tilted his head at me, remaining silent.
I threw up my arms. "Fine, wear the damn skirt. But you had better keep things tucked in. Any hint of said angel parts and this is over."
Raphael smiled. He won? How did he do that? He was diabolical. — Ashlan Thomas

There were too many of my happiest days and they all revolved around him. But I could only think of the moment Xander's tears were his heaviest and his words incredibly pained. — Ashlan Thomas

I'll let you get back to sweating and grunting."
"You probably shouldn't leave then. — Ashlan Thomas

For the second time today, I left her, both of us broken, only halves of one soul that yearned to fit together. — Ashlan Thomas

Oh, you poor angel. I know I joke, but I think perhaps you are a few feathers short of a wing. — Ashlan Thomas

Abby, come on. No guy on this planet would say no to their girl in the famous metal bikini. — Ashlan Thomas

I have been tied up, my apologies, Abigail Miller." He chuckled deeply at his corny joke and I would have rolled my eyes, but considering he just took an epic fall, I let him have this one. — Ashlan Thomas

How could Gabriel not sense it? How did I know something an Archangel didn't?
Abby had a pure soul. — Ashlan Thomas

A groan rumbled through him as he kissed me like an oxygen-starved man and I was his air. — Ashlan Thomas

Maggie had no clue that looking at her was like being stabbed in the gut. No clue that she ripped my heart to pieces by just standing in front of me. This girl had no clue that her very existence shredded my soul. — Ashlan Thomas

I was actually drowning in a pool full of people and I knew how to swim. I wondered how long it would take someone to realize there was a dead body in the pool. Would I sink or bounce on the surface like a floating chlorinator? — Ashlan Thomas

I came because I wanted to be the one to break the news to you. No amount of prayers, confessions in a wooden booth, counting rosary beads, kneeling before a cross, or fasting will purify a soul. Once you've welcomed evil inside you, there is no turning back. Heaven will reject you. — Ashlan Thomas

If you hear screaming, it's my meltdown. Do me a favor and make sure I stay dressed."
Those hazel eyes took their sweet time taking in every inch of my body. "I make no promises. — Ashlan Thomas

I don't burn, but if you're offering to rub your hands all over my body, I sure as hell wouldn't stop you. — Ashlan Thomas

I stepped out of the Millennium Falcon and went to Star Wars heaven. — Ashlan Thomas

I slugged his rock of an arm and noticed the slight movement as his shoulder rolled back - it wasn't to avoid being hit, more like he was trying to save my hand. How strong was he? — Ashlan Thomas

Why do you have to be so damn wonderful all the time? Especially now!"
"I can't help it. I am what I am. — Ashlan Thomas

I don't want to talk anymore," I mumbled.
A throaty sound rumbled above me. "That is wise. This time should be spent eating, fattening you up. How anyone as scrawny as you can walk is commendable. — Ashlan Thomas

Raphael's citrine eyes flashed in the night. Leaning down to me, his look wiped any smile from my face, full of promise. "I was asked to dirty the Earth with you, you filthy bastard. — Ashlan Thomas

The impossible happened. Your stomach is full. — Ashlan Thomas

I chose you. It was always you. From the first moment I held you, I knew you were mine. — Ashlan Thomas

One simply did not invite death upon their door unless they were hoping to die. — Ashlan Thomas

I have singular tastes. The Alexander Wright. He is tall, dark, handsome, unique, and heavenly. — Ashlan Thomas

If it pleases you to know, it was no pleasure of mine touching you. I find humans to be quite filthy. I certainly do not know how the Guardians do it. — Ashlan Thomas

I examined the ten feet I would have to walk alone and remembered my left mind made me a moron. — Ashlan Thomas

In case I forget to tell you, this was the best night of my existence. — Ashlan Thomas

Someone had ripped the heart right out of my chest like that creepy Indian priest rocking a skull-hat adorned with a shrunken head in The Temple of Doom. I had no idea if it was even physically possible to rip a heart out of a human chest with just a hand, but there really was no other way to explain this feeling. — Ashlan Thomas

You would deprive the world of this face? — Ashlan Thomas

I'm gonna make you hairless where God didn't intend. — Ashlan Thomas

It's fine. I use foul language and you bust up small mountains." I examined the rubble around us. "We each have our coping mechanisms. — Ashlan Thomas

Rainbow what? Are you searching for a pot of gold? Tiny leprechauns? Hoping to catch the elusive pegacorn? — Ashlan Thomas

I made a snap decision between pink and black. I didn't want to seem like a pervert digging around in your lingerie drawer.'
'No, you're a pervert for gawking at me from below the neck to above my knees. — Ashlan Thomas

Yes, when the man you're in love with is breaking up with you, this is the typical human female response." I waved frantically at myself. "Hysterical crying on the side of the road, yelling at an invisible, glowing giant. — Ashlan Thomas

Once upon a times and happy ever afters could suck it and die. — Ashlan Thomas

I like me for you. — Ashlan Thomas

Abby was my reason for being. God had a purpose for her and I was a part of it, I must be. Together we would fulfill His Design. I knew it to be true with every cell coursing through me. Abby belonged to me. — Ashlan Thomas

The girls were riveted by Georgia's lecture on the importance of sports bras and the dangers of the uni-boob, double busting, slippage, unsightly bulges, and my personal favorite, head lighting. I thought she made valid points and I would never have guessed that bouncing boobs were so problematic. — Ashlan Thomas

He could have told her there was a stampede of elephants headed toward her to escape a meteor hurtling at Earth, and she wouldn't have heard anything after his smile. She was Xanderized. — Ashlan Thomas

I want to run my finger over the lip you're biting and kiss you. I wouldn't stop there. I would fly you far away from here and practice for days with you. That's what I want to do. Just so you know. — Ashlan Thomas

Little known fact and I'd learned this one early on. Mom had two voices. One was nurturing, sweet and nice, loving and gentle. That was the voice she'd used for whoever was on the phone just now. Actually, most people were on the receiving end of that voice. Most people meaning anyone who didn't have a penis with the last name Scott.

The other, though, was reserved for her dipshit sons or anyone with a penis and the last name Scott. There was nothing sweet and loving in that tone and she had the uncanny ability to make me feel like I was four years old again and I'd just used her red lipstick to draw Iron Man on the wall. No doubt, it was our fault. We'd driven our poor mother to adopt this alternate persona over the years because we were complete and utter dipshits. — Ashlan Thomas

If you fall apart, it's a bad omen for the rest of the couples on Earth. — Ashlan Thomas

Today would rank as one of the stupidest things I'd done, taking the place of indoor stair skiing. — Ashlan Thomas

Did you know I've been in love with you, your entire life? Did you know I truly believe you were made for me, a part of me, our fates bound together? Your heart, albeit weak, was meant for me and only me. — Ashlan Thomas