Apanhados Quotes & Sayings

When you see a comedian on stage, the best comedians make it feel like a conversation. But it's not. We have very little interest in what an audience has to say during a performance. Being a stand-up comedian, you're an egomaniac to some degree. Everyone wants to hear what you have to say, apparently. That's not how real relationships work. — Hari Kondabolu

You are it! You are the one you've been waiting for...be clear about your intentions and the universe will meet you wherever you are... — Bev Baker

For some reason I have a visual intuition that allows me to design things in an interesting way, and I don't know where that came from. Because I don't have this formal training, I seem to drift in a different direction. — David Carson

Be mindful of your social environment. By nature, the group you hang-out with will develop a common behavior and mindset. This behavior usually gravitates towards the lowest common denominator. Choose your group wisely. — Steve Maraboli

Subject: Desert Dick
So, I'm emailing you right now because I just thought about how much pain you're in currently ... We haven't talked about you getting laid in quite a while, and that concerns me. Greatly. Like, I've CRIED about your lack of pu**y ... I'm very sorry that so many women have sent you fraudulent pictures and given you a severe case of blue balls. I'm attaching the links to a top of the line lotion that I think you should invest in for the weeks to come.
Your dick is in my prayers,
- Alyssa. — Whitney Gracia Williams

The Stars are a long way off, and their words get somewhat dulled in the message. — Bram Stoker

Well, I believe that "thinking" is just as real a phenomenon in the world as anything else, and just as worthy of exploration. Maybe even more? So writing about "thought" to me is like writing about a tree or anything else real. — Matthew Zapruder

Conquer the thousands of man may not be called a winner, but be able to conquer yourself is called a brilliant conqueror! — Sukarno

There must be a remedy even for such a crying evil as this [abortion]. But where shall it be found, at least where begin, if not in the complete enfranchisement and elevation of women? — Elizabeth Cady Stanton

Chiropractic is health insurance. Premiums small. Dividends large! — B. J. Palmer

From the moment he held her, and looked into her eyes, he was a changed man. He'd held that tiny girl in his arms that moment; he would hold her in his heart forever. p. 20 Joe Bristow on being a father — Jennifer Donnelly

You show me a tropical fruit and I'll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala. — George Carlin

I am very outspoken, obviously, and I should say that I can't judge anyone for doing anything. — Kat Dennings

Know the philosophy, know the details, and ignore everything in the middle. — Gary Vaynerchuk