Ants Funny Quotes & Sayings

I'd rather be stung to death by a bunch of piss ants. ~Synola Harper, You're Busting My Nuptials — Ann Everett

Ant 1: So, uh, do you ever worry that your itsy little neck is just going to snap under the weight of your head?
Ant 2: Stop asking me that. You ask me that, like, every five minutes.
Ant 1: Sometimes I notice my antennae out of the corner of my eye and I'm all, like: AHH! Something is on me! Get it off! Get it off!
Ant 2: Yeah, the antennae again. Listen, I just remembered, I have to go walk around aimlessly now. — Jim Benton

The job of the president of the United States is to talk to the public, is to explain to them. Now, some presidents talk too much, like Bill Clinton. Some presidents try to talk but don't know how, like George Bush senior. — P. J. O'Rourke

I find myself very, very happy to be a weird writer. — Rachel

There are people who are drawn to secrets as ants are to jam. Fausta's one of them. She searches out all things unspoken and unseen-not to make them known, but to destroy them so that nobody knows they ever existed. That's what makes her heart beat faster, the destruction of invisible foundations. Why? Because she finds it funny. — Helen Oyeyemi

God wants to set the oppressed free from being oppressed and the oppressors free from oppressing. — Desmond Tutu

Who among us would ask our children for a loan, so we could spend money we do not have on things we do not need? — Bobby Jindal

But I'm thinking about 12 things at once, a hundred thousand times a day. Most people do, I would imagine. — Dave Eggers

I'm exceptional at taking my foot out of my mouth. — Priscilla Glenn

Sometimes in politics one must duel with skunks, but no one should be fool enough to allow skunks to choose the weapons. — Joseph Cannon

I bought an ant farm. I don't know where I am going to get a tractor that small! — Steven Wright

The funny thing about my procrastination was that I was almost done with the screenplay. I was like a person who had fought dragons and lost limbs and crawled through swamps and now, finally, the castle was visible. I could see tiny children waving flags on the balcony; all I had to do was walk across a field to get to them. But all of a sudden I was very, very sleepy. And the children couldn't believe their eyes as I folded down to my knees and fell to the ground face-first, with my eyes open. Motionless, I watched ants hurry in and out of a hole and I knew that standing up again would be a thousand times harder than the dragon or the swamp and so I did not even try. I just clicked on one thing after another after another. — Miranda July

I learned to swallow words back, hold secrets on my tongue until they dissolved like soap bubbles. — Lauren Oliver

Systems Thinking provides the more holistic way to view the problems — Pearl Zhu

When they were naming the animals, somebody got lazy: anteater? What's it doing? It's eating ants. DONE! — Demetri Martin

I often felt better as soon as I swallowed my vitamin C, long before it had time to take effect. Medical researchers call it 'placebo effect'; I prefer to call it magic, for it occurs when something - a pill or a word - is imbued with power and meaning, and so it becomes effective. That is alchemy. — Kat Duff

I was playing golf. I swung, missed the ball, and got a big chunk of dirt. I swung again, missed the ball, and got another big chunk of dirt. Just then, 2 ants climbed on the ball saying, "Let's get up here before we get killed!" — Henny Youngman

And if you can't see anything beautiful about yourself
get a better mirror
look a little closer
stare a little longer
because there's something inside you
that made you keep trying
despite everyone who told you to quit
you built a cast around your broken heart
and signed it yourself
you signed it
they were wrong — Shane Koyczan

I had the great idea of using markers to gently color the ants so I could tell them apart, but I learned that this is exactly like somebody trying to gently color on you with a thirty-story building.
Without dwelling on the tragedy, I'd just like to say that I'm deeply sorry to Mr. Purple and the surviving Purple family. — Jim Benton