Amusingly Twisted Quotes & Sayings

I think my major challenge, very frankly, is to maintain the traction, ... I've seen many campaigns here in the state of New Hampshire look good for a while, and then the air comes out of the balloon. — John McCain

Presents, I often say, endear absents. — Charles Lamb

I really want to have a possibility of going into the Hall of Fame one day. I think that's huge with a lot of baseball writers and old school guys. Of course, that's not the main goal - the main goal is winning a World Series. Hall of Fame is so far away. It's just something I've always thought about doing. I want to be as clean as I can. — Bryce Harper

What a weak, credulous, incredulous, unbelieving, superstitious, bold, frightened, what a ridiculous world ours is, as far as concerns the mind of man. How full of inconsistencies, contradictions and absurdities it is. I declare that taking the average of many minds that have recently come before me ... I should prefer the obedience, affections and instinct of a dog before it. — Michael Faraday

I love that thing on Amazon that you can go on and order a book, and you click on it and it says, 'You might also like,' or 'Other people who bought this have bought that.' — Kelly Macdonald

It seemed weird to me that he'd spent his Christmas alone ... and had seemed to like it. He hadn't seemed to think anyone should feel sorry for him about that, either. — Rachel Cohn

It stared at them, and it paused for a hundred years, which transpired in a dozen heart beats. — Neil Gaiman

Until then I had always thought of loneliness as something negative - an absence of company, and, of course, something temporary ... That day I had learned that it was much more. It was something which could press and oppress, could distort the ordinary and play tricks with the mind. Something which lurked inimically all around, stretching the nerves and twanging them with alarms, never letting one forget that there was no one to help, no one to care. It showed one as an atom adrift in vastness, and it waited all the time its chance to frighten and frighten horribly - that was what loneliness was really trying to do; and that was what one must never let it do ... — John Wyndham

Look at him he's just now getting ready and dressed and its 6 fucking minutes to the show! God fucking musicians. — Alan Cumming

The message I'm sending to myself - I can't change the world until I change myself first. — Kendrick Lamar

It wasn't just coffee ... it was an experience. Smooth, roasted, buttery notes gave away to a velvet finish. — Lisa Kleypas

When two great powers disagree about anything - it doesn't matter what - they must find a way to settle it somehow by arbitration or by negotiation, not by war or threat of war. — Bertrand Russell

When silence confronts us, the question to which there is no answer rings out in the silence. That ultimate "why," that great "why" is like a light that blots out everything, but a blinding light; nothing more can be made out ... — Eugene Ionesco

You are truly Satan's sequined spawn. — Libba Bray