All Weasel Quotes & Sayings

For those of you who may be unaware, [Michael] Boskin is the economist/weasel/fraud who helped to officially distort the CPI, making it more or less worthless as a measure of inflation. The Boskin Commission ... was an act of cowardice. Rather than man up and say fix this, its broken, we can't afford it ... — Barry Ritholtz

With Weasel and Arisa at his side, anything was possible. Anything. — Hilari Bell

Well, your last boyfriend had a nose like a weasel." "Maybe it wasn't his nose that made him special." Kane made a face. "Thanks for the visual. Excuse me while I vomit to death. — Melissa Landers

What annoyed me was that I so often attempted to weasel out of things on purpose, it killed me to do it by accident. It seemed like a waste of whatever detailed lie I was going to have to come up with. — Sloane Crosley

I've had stupid teachers, lazy teachers, boring teachers, teachers who were teachers because their parents were and they hadn't the imagination to think of anything else, teachers who were teachers because of cowardice, because of fear, because of the holidays, because of the pensions, because they were never called to account, never had to actually be any good, ones who could not survive in any other profession, who were not aware they had trod on butterflies. But none of those compared to Mr Maurice Crossan. He was the one who first stamped on my brother's soul. He was dark, as they say here. For those who want more of him visit the dark character of Orlick Dolge in Great Expectations and cross that with a ginger-headed weasel. — Niall Williams

The weasel under the cocktail cabinet. — Harold Pinter

The country was lumbering towards election day. Strike turned in early on Sunday and watched the day's gaffes, counterclaims and promises being tabulated on his portable TV. There was an air of joylessness in every news report he watched. The national debt was so huge that it was diffcult to comprehend. Cuts were coming, whoever won; deep, painful cuts; and sometimes, with their weasel words, the party leaders reminded Strike of the surgeons who had told him cautiously that he might experience a degree of discomfort; they who would never personally feel the pain that was about to be inflicted. — Robert Galbraith

And what about yellowback dogs who'd use children to kill the whole world from ambush, my friend? The whole universe?" The Weasel blinked at that, as if he'd expected no such reply. Perhaps any reply at all. "I had . . . my orders. — Stephen King

An ugly man, with a face sharp like a weasel and a habit of running a flickering tongue over his lips before he speaks. But most ugly of all are his eyes: blue, bright blue. When people see them, they flinch. Such things are freakish. He is lucky he was not killed at birth. — Madeline Miller

I left the room in a daze, wondering if this was all real-or if I'd finally gone insane from whacking the weasel. — Sam Torode

Agnostic for me would be trying to weasel out and sound a little nicer than I am about this. — Richard P. Feynman

There's a gigantic gray area between good moral behavior and outright felonious activities. I call that the Weasel Zone and it's where most of life happens. — Scott Adams

You can hardly call Deor old.' Arisa wrapped her arms around herself; the breeze was brisk despite the sunlight. 'He didn't live long enough to get old. Why would he do that? I know kings are supposed to care for the realm above all else, and so on, and so on, but that's rot. They're men, just like anyone else. Do you think he really, deliberately, laid down his life?'
'Yes,' said Weasel. 'At least, I think it's possible.'
It was the last answer she'd expected from Weasel-the-cynic.
'But why?' Arisa asked.
'Not having been there, I can't say for sure.' Weasel stuck his hands in his pockets. 'But I'd guess it was for the future.'
Arisa frowned. 'I don't understand.'
'The One God willing,' said Weasel softly, 'you never will. — Hilari Bell

Come back here the day before yesterday, you noodle-legged weasel! — Hisaya Nakajo

Secret 7591.42.21. Avoiding weasel words in your intelligence analysis isn't easy when your intelligence analysis is about weasels. — The Covert Comic

If you wish to carry a hungry weasel in your pocket, it is your choice. — Tad Williams

Somehow is a super-weasel, a word that betrays that the author didn't want to bother thinking out the story - "Somehow — Ursula K. Le Guin

I was mean life a wolf. Now i'm mean like a weasel. When you're huntin' somepin you're a hunter, an' you're strong. Can't nobody beat a hunter. But when you get hunted
that's different. Somepin happens to you. You ain't strong; maybe you're fierce, but you ain't strong. I been hunted now for a long time. I ain't no hunter no more. — John Steinbeck

Or, as I call it, a Cheesel, it's a Weasel with a Cheese finish. — Bill Bailey

Suddenly, I developed an acute case of Tourette's syndrome, Fuck! That fucking-shit-son-of-an-ass-monkey-dick-weasel! — Christine Zolendz

People in my constituency are starving and born with sixteen fingers. Did you ever eat weasel shish-kebob? Freddy doesn't walk by the side of the motorways to gather dandelions for his salad, but the people who sent me here do. Why are we supporting him? He doesn't deserve it. The Tories won't give milk to children who go to school hungry and come home to baked cat. — Mark Helprin

She couldn't help being a weasel. She was born that way. — Tessa Dare

Weasel words from mollycoddles will never do when the day demands prophetic clarity from greathearts. Manly men must emerge for this hour of trial. — Theodore Roosevelt

My nose is Gargantuan! You little Pig-snout, you tiny Monkey-Nostrils, you virtually invisible Pekinese-Puss, don't you realize that a nose like mine is both scepter and orb, a monument to me superiority? A great nose is the banner of a great man, a generous heart, a towering spirit, an expansive soul
such as I unmistakably am, and such as you dare not to dream of being, with your bilious weasel's eyes and no nose to keep them apart! With your face as lacking in all distinction
as lacking, I say, in interest, as lacking in pride, in imagination, in honesty, in lyricism
in a word, as lacking in nose as that other offensively bland expanse at the opposite end of your cringing spine
which I now remove from my sight by stringent application of my boot! — Edmond Rostand

I don't know what position you're talking about, sir. The Gnomon Society has never questioned the rotundity of the earth. Mr. Jimmerson is himself a skilled topographer."
"Excuse me, Mr. Popper, but I have it right here in Mr. Jimmerson's own words on page twenty-nine of 101 Gnomon Facts."
"No, sir. Excuse me but you don't. Please look again. Read that passage carefully and you'll see what we actually say is that the earth looks flat. We still say that. It's so flat around Brownsville as to be striking to the eye."
"But isn't that just a weasel way of saying that you really believe if to be flat?"
"Not at all. What we're saying is that the curvature of the earth is so gentle, relative to our human scale of things, that we need not bother or take it into account when going for a stroll, say, or laying out our gardens. — Charles Portis

He was a mongoose, rather like a little cat in his fur and his tail, but quite like a weasel in his head and his habits. — Rudyard Kipling

Nothing I do to describe these experiences can possibly convey the emotions that went with them. If there were a drug that could reproduce the same effect, I would be on that drug right now, and damn the side effects. Imagine a blend of all your favorite things: ice cream, sex, white sandy beaches, Beethoven's symphonies, all those happy times with your Garden-Weasel, the whole nine yards. Picture these experiences combined, boiled down into their most concentrated elements of pure joy, then multiplied by trillions and injected into every one of your cells. That might begin to help you imagine what I felt when the sense of Something Bigger emerged in the hurricane's eye of my life, surrounded by events that were otherwise completely devastating. The peace and joy were so dazzling, so potent, that I thought they would never fade. — Martha N. Beck

Hello Ra," he said in a kindly voice. "It's been a long time."
A feeble voice from behind the chair said,"Can't play. Go away."
"would you like a treat?" Apophis asked. "we used to play so nicely together. Every night, trying to kill each other. Don't you remember?"
Ra poked his head above the throne. "Treat?"
"How about a stuffed date?" Apophis pulled one out of the air. "You used to love stuffed dates, didn't you? All you have to do is come out and let me devour - I mean entertain you."
" Want a cookie," Ra said.
"What kind?"
"Weasel cookie."
I'm here to tell you, that comment about weasel cookies probably saved the known universe. — Rick Riordan

There is such a thing as the poetry of a mistake, and when you say, "Mistakes were made," you deprive an action of its poetry, and you sound like a weasel. — Charles Baxter

Oh, he is cute!" Shane said in a fake girly voice. "Gee, maybe we can ask him out!"
"Shut up, you weasel. Claire, hit him! — Rachel Caine

The dog-faced, small-cocked, hypocrite bastard son of a weasel and a whore bowed and escorted his wife from the house. — James S.A. Corey

Are you trying to weasel out of showing us any of this stuff?' said Zacharias Smith.
'Here's an idea,' said Ron loudly, 'why don't you shut your mouth?'
'Well, we've all turned up to learn from him, and now he's telling us he can't really do any of it,' he said.
'That's not what he said,' said Fred Weasley.
'Would you like us to clean out your ears for you?' inquired George, pulling a long and lethal-looking metal instrument from inside one of the Zonko's bags.
'Or any part of your body, really, we're not fussy where we stick this,' said Fred. — J.K. Rowling

You're as cowardly as a g
weasel. You know that? A weasel. That's what you are."
"You don't know me," I say, spitting blood onto the dirt. I can't help it. I start to laugh. "And you obviously don't know much about weasels, either. — Holly Black

You weasel, good-for-nothing, scumbag, swine,
sleazebag, scumbucket, scoundrel, son-of-a-bitch!"
In the midst of everything, we all looked at Rosina,
who smiled sheepishly.
"Sorry. I was reading the Dictionary the other day."
I stared at her with incomprehension. — Kelly Batten

Most of us are animal lovers. We insist that we love all animals equally - the hamster, the weasel, and the zebra - but if pressed, we will admit to being either a cat person or a dog person. — Nicole Hollander

All he knew was that the rage was still there, eating inside him, not with the slow stealth of a cancer, but with the rapid, careless ravening of a weasel gnawing at his entrails, or the constant alimentary torment that drives on the shark to his incessant feeding until only death gives him rest. — Chet Williamson

Her lips thinned, but she ignored the bait. "Schedules have been moved up in all departments, you know. Claire received her new reproduction assignment. It didn't include Tony." "Reproduction assignment? You mean, having a baby?" Leo could feel his face flushing. Somewhere within him, a long-controlled steam pressure began to build. "Do you hide what you're really doing from yourselves with those weasel-words, too? And here I thought the propaganda was just for us peons." Yei started to speak, but Leo overrode her, bursting out, "Good God! Were you born inhuman, or did you grow so by degrees - M.S., M.D., Ph.D. . . ." Yei — Lois McMaster Bujold

Uh," said Ash from the door, "are you - all right?"

"Fine!" Kami said. She typed out: "With the advent of sperm banks, women realized the sheer uselessness of men, and by the year 2100 they were largely extinct" with extreme force. "Absolutely fine, never better! Why do you ask?"

"Er, because I heard you and Jared had a screaming fight. Also, you are typing like a maddened weasel taped to a keyboard."

Kami stopped typing. "You may have a point. — Sarah Rees Brennan

Will that be all?" I asked the pimply faced teen who ogled my exposed legs as if in heat. My pen tapped impatiently on the notepad while I waited for him to look up.
Slowly his dull grey eyes roved over my body and a limp smile drew up his thin, crusted lips making him look more weasel than human.
"Yep. That'd be it," his cheerful, adolescent voice cracked.
"Great," I mumbled, walking back behind the counter. — Brandi Salazar

We procured from an Indian a weasel perfectly white except the extremity of the tail which was black: great numbers of wild geese are passing to the south, but their flight is too high for us to procure any of them. — Meriwether Lewis

yourself to sleep at night. Bleed your weasel. — Anthony Doerr

Do you see yonder cloud that's almost in shape of a camel?
Polonius: By the mass, and 'tis like a camel, indeed.
Hamlet: Methinks it is like a weasel.
Polonius: It is backed like a weasel.
Hamlet: Or like a whale?
Polonius: Very like a whale. — William Shakespeare

Dear Mr Lipwig,
I feel that you are a dear, sweet man who will look after my little Mr Fusspot. Please be kind to him. He has been my only friend in difficult times. Money is such a crude thing in these circumstances, but the sum of $20,000 annually will be paid to you (in arrears) for performing this duty, which I beg you to accept.
If you do not, or if he dies of unnatural causes, your arse will belong to the Guild of Assassins. $100,000 is lodged with Lord Downey, and his young gentlemen will hunt you down and gut you like the weasel you are, Smart Boy!
May the gods bless you for your kindness to a widow in distress. — Terry Pratchett

I didn't want to live in a broken world or a broken me. I wasn't trying to weasel out of anything, I just wasn't in the mood to be on earth that night. — Donald Miller

Some men can be very rude. On the other hand, some clients are absolute angels. One john always brought me a gift every time he came to see me. He brought me a pearl necklace, a ring, a bra or something. But eventually, as much as I really loved all the gifts, he fell in love with me, and he tried to weasel his way into my life. It was too much and I sort of had to 'break up with him. — Annie Sprinkle

For every species on land, excepting only the weasel, there is a corresponding species in the water, — Louis Ginzberg

Television is a dirty business. To survive in it you have to be part weasel, part python, and part wolf. To succeed in it, you have to be 99.9 percent great white shark. The capacity for barefaced lying also comes in handy, particularly if you are freelance. — Matt Dickinson

I wonder if you're fast as they say," Bessie Weasel chirruped, her hand slowly straying toward the belt.
"Wondering is free," Cinnabar said finally, his voice soft and low. "Certainty has its price". — Daniel Polansky

Do you recall telling Dr. Phillips during your appointment on February second of last year that you needed to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases because - let me make sure I get this correct here . . ."
Taylor read out loud from her file,

"Because, quote, 'your weasel-dick husband slept with a skanky whore stripper and the cheating bastard didn't use a rubber'?"

Ms. Campbell shot up in her chair. "She actually wrote that down?"

The jury tittered with amused laughter and sat up interestedly. Finally - things were starting to look a little more like Law & Order around here.

"I take it that's a yes?" Taylor asked. — Julie James

Occasionally I hear a band that blows me away. For instance, there's a musician in Oakland named Weasel Walter who has a band called the Flying Luttenbachers. Go see the Flying Luttenbachers when they're in your town. He's one of the greatest rock composers who ever lived, and he's struggling and living like a poverty-stricken hermit. — Glenn Branca

The eagle may soar, but the weasel never gets sucked into a jet engine. — John Benfield

One of our defects as a nation is a tendency to use what have been called 'weasel words.' When a weasel sucks eggs the meat is sucked out of the egg. If you use a 'weasel word' after another there is nothing left of the other. — Theodore Roosevelt

Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch. — W.C. Fields

Who are you?" he would ask her every day. "No one," she would answer, she who had been Arya of House Stark, Arya Underfoot, Arya Horseface. She had been Arry and Weasel too, and Squab and Salty, Nan the cupbearer, a grey mouse, a sheep, the ghost of Harrenhal ... but not for true, not in her heart of hearts. In there she was Arya of Winterfell, the daughter of Lord Eddard Stark and Lady Catelyn, who had once had brothers named Robb and Bran and Rickon, a sister named Sansa, a direwolf called Nymeria, a half brother named Jon Snow. In there she was someone ... but that was not the answer he wanted. — George R R Martin

If the monkey really wanted to get the weasel, he would've stopped wasting time and burned down the mulberry bush. — M.E. Castle

Shaking his head, Jace regarded the heavens as if they were about to open up and reveal the secrets of the universe. "With everything that's going on, you're worried about Weasel Face? — Cassandra Clare

You're a bastard," I said.
"Uhtred," he began, but could find nothing more to say.
"You're a piece of weasel-shit," I said, "you're an earsling."
"I'm a king," he said, trying to regain his dignity.
"So you're a royal piece of weasel-shit. An earsling on a throne. — Bernard Cornwell

-Lara is a weasel. I've always hated her. The only happy week I had as a child was when she fell from the roof and went into a coma. She came out of it, though. Everyone was so happy.
-Is that true? asked James.
-No, said Grieve. But they would have been happy. Everyone thinks she's so clever. And I would be happy if she went away and never came back. — Jesse Ball

To put it bluntly, your flesh is a weasel, a poser, and a selfish pig. And your flesh is not you. Did you know that? Your flesh is not the real you. — John Eldredge

There are as many burning guitars, as there are burning doves. — Weasel

The little weasel ripped all the buttons off my couch.
Ivan Petrovsky, pg 350 — Kerrelyn Sparks

It took me about a half an hour to weasel Daemon away from my mom.
Maybe I wouldn't have to worry about her and Will. Maybe I needed to worry about her and Daemon. Cougar. — Jennifer L. Armentrout

My character on 'I'm In the Band,' Derek Jupiter of Iron Weasel, is definitely one of the crazier ones. That's completely on the other end of the spectrum. There's absolutely nothing like Derek any shape or form. I'm having so much fun playing this egotistical, '80s-era rockstar - everything he does is from the point-of-view of a rockstar. — Steve Valentine

Values and verdicts never bother me half as much as people trying to weasel their way around them, or people compromising their reason to pander to their own prejudices and preconceptions, which they are so rarely competent to look in the face. — Kenny Smith

My first fight was a little weasel from American called Andre Dirrell. I say that because he runs and holds, and I hope Abraham bangs him out. — Carl Froch

To err is human. To cover it up is weasel. — Scott Adams