Adelina Amouteru Quotes & Sayings

For a fleeting moment, I imagine that if I were queen, I could make the act of hurting malfettos a crime. I could execute this boy's pursuers with a single command. — Marie Lu

I am the nightmare. — Marie Lu

You have goodness in your heart, but your darkness overwhelms it all; your desire to hurt, destroy, and avenge is more powerful than your desire to love, help, and light the way. — Marie Lu

Magiano just shrugs. He studies me for a brief moment. What does he see? Then he utters a small laugh. "Just point me in the direction of the royal treasury, Your Majesty," he says, waving a hand in the air. He turns away as he speaks, but not before I catch a hint of sadness on his face. "Then you'll always know where to find me. — Marie Lu

Don't be afraid," he says with a half smile. "You're with me." His hand tightens around my wrist, tugging me down again playfully. And this time, I feel safe enough to take a deep breath of my own and do as he says. — Marie Lu

Why do you still want to find her? The whispers taunt me. Why? Why?
It's a question they ask over and over again. And my answer is always the same. Because I decide when she can leave. Not her. — Marie Lu

The complete stillness of my energy is something I have never felt before. I am full of light. I am confused. A strange mix of guilt and wonder swims inside me.
The thought of ruling Kenettra with Enzo at my side - Enzo, who had saved me from certain death, who brought my powers out with a mere touch of his hand on my back, whose own fire awakened my ambitions - thrills me. So why am I here, this close to a boy who is not my prince? Why am I reacting in this way to his touch? — Marie Lu

He is not Enzo, I remind myself. But I don't want him to be. With Enzo, my energy yearned for his power and ambition, all too happy to let him take me into the darkness. But with Magiano ... I am able to smile, even to laugh. I am able to sit here and lean back and point out the constellations. — Marie Lu

When Compasia took pity on me, she reached down into the Underworld, touched the shoulder of Moritas, and asked her forgiveness. Then Compasia took my sister in her arms and placed her in the sky, where she, too, turned to stardust.
Magiano looks at me, his eyes wide. It seems as if he already, somehow, understands.
"My goddess made me a promise," I whisper.
Only now do I realize that I have never seen him cry before.
In the stories, Compasia and her human lover would descend each night from the stars to walk the mortal world, before vanishing with the dawn. So, together, we stare at the sky, waiting. — Marie Lu

What is the point of searching for love, when love is nothing but an illusion? — Marie Lu

You are so full of light," I say after a moment. "You align with joy, and I with fear and fury. If you could see into my thoughts, you would surely turn away. So why would you stay with me, even if return to Kenettra and resume our lives?"

"You paint me as a saint," he murmurs. "But I aligned with greed solely to prevent that."

Even now, he can make my lips twitch with a smile. "I'm serious, Magiano."

"As am I. None of us are saints. I have seen your darkness, yes, and know your struggle. I won't deny it." He touches my chin with one hand. At this gesture, the whispers seem to settle, pushed away where I can't hear them. "But you are also passionate and ambitious and loyal. You are a thousand things, mi Adelinetta, not just one. Do not reduce yourself to that. — Marie Lu

I am tired of being used, hurt, and cast aside. It is my turn to use. My turn to hurt. — Marie Lu

The world's deadliest mercenaries choose to serve you, the whispers say, because they have yet to meet me. — Marie Lu

I glance at Magiano. "Ready?" I ask.
He winks. Rain soaks us both now, coming down in sheets, and water drips from his high knot of braids. "Always ready for you, my love. — Marie Lu

She walks to the boy, tilts her head up at him, and smiles. He bends down to kiss her. Then he helps her onto the horse, and she rides away with him to a faraway place, until they can no longer be seen.
These are only rumors, of course, and make little more than a story to tell around the fire. But it is told. And thus they live on. — Marie Lu

Why feel guilty for something that isn't your fault?
Because I loved him. And now he is gone. — Marie Lu

And just like that, I feel my power rush back over me in a flood of darkness, filling the empty crevices of my heart and mind with its familiar, poisonous comfort. — Marie Lu

None of it was your fault, the whispers in my head argue. You didn't kill him, after all
it was not your blade that ended his life. So why are you the one cast out? You didn't have to return to the Daggers
you didn't need to help them rescue Raffaele. And still they turned on you. Why does everyone forget your good intentions, Adelina? — Marie Lu

After a lifetime of darkness, I want to leave something behind that is made of light. — Marie Lu

I am Adelina Amouteru, the phantoms whispered to my father, speaking my most frightening thoughts in a chorus of voices, dripping with hatred. My hatred. I belong to no one. On this night, I swear to you that I will rise above everything you've ever taught me. I will become a force that this world has never known. I will come into such power that none will dare hurt me again. — Marie Lu

We are doomed to be forever young. — Marie Lu

A low, sweet sound comes from his throat. I bring a hand up to the back of his neck. Aside from the deep warmth of passion, my energy stays very, very still, and for the first time, I don't miss it. — Marie Lu

Of everything I thought he might say, it was not this. I can only stare at him in disbelief. Then I start to laugh and the whispers join me. You really must be going mad.
Something about Raffaele's expression finally makes my laughter subside. "You're serious," I say, tilting my head in a mock imitation of his familiar gesture. "You must be desperate to think that I would work with you and the Daggers. — Marie Lu

Teren smiles at me. He takes a step closer. "Ah, mi Adelinetta," he says. His eyes soften in a way that surprises me. "I have missed you. You, more than any other abomination, understand what we truly are." He shakes his head. "Had I known you when I was a young boy ... " He lets that sentence die, leaving me curious. — Marie Lu

I will keep you, until the day I choose not to. You have destroyed and harmed all that is dear to me. In return, I want you to know what that feels like. I will not kill you. I will keep you alive. I will torture you." My voice drops to a whisper. "Until your soul is dead. — Marie Lu

No. I cannot let him control me.
You are mine, Adelina, Enzo growls. Turn your powers against your own fleet. — Marie Lu

I need to address my people, and I need to look the part. I will walk out onto the balcony with my head held high, fulfilling the fantasy I'd had as a little girl in my father's home. — Marie Lu

I found a secret place," he whispers. His hand finds mine under the water, tugging on my wrist. "Come with me."
I'm unable to suppress a laugh. "Where are you taking me?" I say in a mock scolding voice.
"I'll beg your forgiveness later, Your Majesty," he teases back, flashing me a grin as he pulls us toward the far end of the pool. — Marie Lu

Let go of me," I choke out, clawing blindly at Teren. The sharp tang of blood suddenly fills my nostrils, and I realize that it is from his wrists, spreading a film of scarlet around us. Somewhere ahead, the silhouette of our ship looms. We are getting closer.
"I wish I could," Teren spits, dripping venom. "There's nothing I'd like to see more than you in the Underworld, Adelina."
His words spark my fury. He never intended to finish this journey with you. Teren grips my arm again so hard that I scream in pain. He is pulling us both toward the ship, his face set in grim determination.
Then I hear him shout, "But I won't."
But I won't. My fury wavers, turning into bewilderment. — Marie Lu

I am numb. I don't know what to do. The absence of my link to Enzo is a yawning chasm, a hollowness I first felt when Teren took Enzo's life in the Estenzian arena. How long had he been a part of my world? How had my life been before he stepped into it? All I can think is that I am losing him all over again, except that I already lost him. — Marie Lu

The first time Raffaele ever saw Adelina, it was a stormy-wracked night that changed her life and, indeed, the world. He recalls looking down from the window in his Dalia lodging to see a girl with silver-bright hair, conjuring an illusion of darkness such that he had never seen. He remembers the day she first came to his chambers in Estenzia, when Enzo was still alive and she was still innocent, and the way she looked up at him with her uncertain, damaged gaze. He remembers her test, and what he said to Enzo that night. How long ago that had been. How he had judged her wrongly. — Marie Lu

The fire in you burns as fiercely as it did when I first met you. — Marie Lu

He cares for you, you know." Violetta turns her head briefly in the direction of the closed doors. "Magiano. I've seen him standing guard outside your door, making sure you aren't having another nightmare or an illusion. — Marie Lu

Already, I'm starting to forget the face of the man I killed. — Marie Lu

I could have killed Giulietta myself ... but this is better.
"I suppose she is a pure-blooded royal, after all," I say aloud. I give Teren a bitter smile. "Now you know how it feels. — Marie Lu

The only way to clamp down on my energy is to erase my emotions, and so I fold them each away, one by one. My sorrow turns to anger, then to ice-cold fury. My soul curls in one itself in defense. I am gone. I am truly gone.
I am not sorry. — Marie Lu

As the sun starts to rise, I watch as Raffaele bends over Enzo's body, the two of us mourning the prince we both loved. — Marie Lu

I suppose you come in here often, then," I say, half teasing. "Bringing your maids and admirers?"
Magiano frowns at that. He shakes his head. "You think I'm bedding every maid I speak to?" he says and shrugs. "Flattered, Your Majesty. But you are very wrong."
"So, what you're telling me is that you come to this secret space alone?"
He tilts his head in a flirtatious way. "What's wrong with a thief wanting a little private time now and then?" He comes closer. His breath warms my skin like the fog that hovers over the water. "Of course, here you are. I suppose I'm not alone, after all. — Marie Lu

You, my righteous little sister? You left me to suffer our father alone. Do you know what it was like for me, to lie bleeding on the floor, while he showered you with dresses in the next bedchamber? Do you know what it was like for our father to threaten to kill me, and then for me to murder him in return? No, you don't. You stand on the sidelines and wait for me to do your dirty work. You hide in the shadows so that I can bleed for you. You give me your pitiful look when I kill, but you do not stop me. And now you judge me for that? — Marie Lu

Embelish your flaws. They will turn into your assets. And if you become one of us, I will teach you to wield them like an assassin wields a knife. — Marie Lu

I will wake a hundred times, lost in the madness of this nightmare, until the sunlight streaming through my windows finally burns the scene away. Even then, hours later, I cannot be sure I am not still in my dream.
I am afraid that, one night, I will never wake. I will be doomed to rush to that door over and over again, running from a nightmare in which I am always, forever, lost. — Marie Lu

Why so surprised, White Wolf? he murmurs, smiling a little. There is something in the way he says my Elite name, a secret sweetness.
Why so surprised that you are worthy? — Marie Lu

Once upon a time, a girl had a father, a prince, a society of friends. Then they betrayed her, so she destroyed them all. — Marie Lu

I'm going to follow her, of course," Magiano says. "As the night sky turns. When she appears on the other side of the world, I will be there, and when she returns here, so will I. — Marie Lu

Enzo's eyes flick back to me. He does not ask if I will be okay. His silent approval makes me stand taller. — Marie Lu

Do I frighten you?" I ask softly.
He seems to think about that. After a while, he leans back and looks skyward. "I don't know," he replies. "But I do know that I may never meet another like you again. — Marie Lu

I have spent my entire life thinking of the Inquisitors as things, soulless creatures. But they are just men. Men can be swayed, and I have the power to do it. — Marie Lu

I walk over to Teren, then bend down so that my gaze meets his. I watch the rain pour down his face. When was the first time I saw this face? When I was chained to the stake, of course, and he had come over to bend down before me. How poised he had been, then, with his handsome, chiseled face and his mad, pulsing eyes. I smile, realizing that we have switched places now. — Marie Lu

Violetta's voice trembles. "Raffaele is saying that all of us, all Elites, are in danger."

That we are doomed to be forever young. — Marie Lu

I'm suddenly angry. Why must I lose everything that I care for? Why is love such a weakness? I wish, for an instant, that I didn't need such a thing. — Marie Lu

The gods gave us powers, Adelina, because we are born to rule. — Marie Lu

We might not return from this voyage. None of us. We might all lay down our lives when we reach the end, and not ever know whether our sacrifice changed anything for the better."
"It will be for the better," Magiano replies. "We cannot just die, not without trying. Not without fighting."
"Do you really believe that?" I ask. "Why are we doing this, anyway? To preserve my own life, and yours - but what has the world ever done for us in order to deserve our sacrifice?"
Magiano's brows furrow for a moment, then he leans in closer. "We exist because this world exists. It's a responsibility of ours, whether or not anyone will remember it." He nods at me. "And they will. Because we will return and make sure of it. — Marie Lu

You are a light," she replies gently. "And when you shine, you shine bright. — Marie Lu

Set this world on fire, Enzo. With everything you have. — Marie Lu

Fear motivates, more than love or ambition or joy. Fear is more powerful than anything else in the world. I have spent so long yearning for things - for love, for acceptance - that I do not really need. I need nothing except the submission that comes with fear. I do not know why it took me so long to learn this. — Marie Lu

Do you know what I miss the most? That night."
My heart skips a beat, aching in sudden sadness. "And what about the girl you once sat beside, on that night? Do you miss her too?"
"She is still here," he answers. "That is why I stay. — Marie Lu

I have earned my revenge on everyone who hurt me. My father, who tortured me every day - I crushed his chest and his heart. Teren, sick and twisted and mad - I took away his beloved just as he took away mine. Raffaele, who betrayed and manipulated me - I seized control of the prince he loves, and I made sure he watched his prince destroy in my name.
And Violetta, darling, dearest sister who turned her back when I needed her the most. I cast her out. I finally said everything to her that I wanted to say.
I have hurt back. — Marie Lu

Why do you look?" I mutter.
I half expect Magiano to tease me, spitting back one of his sarcastic phrases. But he doesn't smile. "We are drawn to stories," he says in a soft voice, "and every scar carries one." He lifts a hand and places his palm gently against the ruined side of my face, covering the scar.
I look down, embarrassed now. Instinctively, I reach up to brush some of my hair over my face - only to remember that I no longer have long locks.
"Hiding it makes you more beautiful," Magiano says. Then he takes his hand away, exposing my scar again. "But revealing it makes you you." He nods at me. "So wear it proudly. — Marie Lu

Something blackens your heart, something deep and bitter. It has festered inside you for years, nurtured and encouraged. I've never felt anything like it. — Marie Lu

I have everything I could ever want here, Adelina," he finally says. "You've handed me what feels like the world's riches, a palace, a life of luxury." He draws closer. "I get to be at your side. What more do I need? — Marie Lu

I smile bitterly at him, then weave an illusion of his face across my own. Raffaele's expression flickers in surprise for a moment before settling back into its pool of calm. "They may have a hard time finding me," I reply.
Raffaele gives me a tight smile in return. "Do not underestimate your enemies, Your Majesty," he says. — Marie Lu

I stare at him, trying to comprehend what he's done. He saved Magiano from falling overboard. He saved me. He is taking this mission seriously, however much he loathes us.
"Maybe next time," he says to me with that smile, "you won't be so lucky. — Marie Lu

You want us to fear you," she growls at me, speaking now in accented Kenettran. "You think that you can come here and destroy our homes, kill our loved ones - then make us grovel at your feet. You think we will sell you our souls for a few coins." She lifts her chin. "But I am not afraid of you."
"Is that so?" I tilt my head at her curiously. "You should be."
She challenges me with a smile. "You can't even bring yourself to spill our blood." She nods in the direction of Sergio, who has already started to draw his sword. "You have one of your lackeys do it for you. You're a coward queen, hiding behind your army. But you cannot crush our spirits beneath your Roses' heels - you cannot win. — Marie Lu

Adelina, stop."
It is Magiano. Magiano. Stop. The name is a small light, but it is there, and I cling to it in the maelstrom around me. I falter as he reaches me and pulls me into a rough embrace.
"He didn't kill her," Magiano is whispering. "Stop. Stop." His hand cradles the back of my head. — Marie Lu

Your Majesty," he whispers, breathless. A note of amusement creeps into his voice. "You'll ruin me. — Marie Lu

Everything about Enzo whispers of danger, of murder in the name of righteousness. I'm desperate to pull away. I ache for more. I tremble uncontrollably, caught in the middle. — Marie Lu

Trusting me," Teren murmurs, "is a dangerous game, mi Adelinetta."
"I'm doing more than that," I reply. "For the rest of this journey, you will be my personal guard."
At that, Teren's eyes flare with surprise and anger. "I'm not your lackey, Your Majesty."
"And I'm not Giulietta," I fire back. — Marie Lu

Behold." Magiano spreads his arms in a gesture of pretend triumph. "Revel in its majesty."
I wrinkle my nose. "Are you trying to impress me with a collapsed archway?"
"No faith. No faith at all." He is back to his old self, and it sends a rare thread of joy through my heart. "Follow me," he murmurs. Then he takes a deep breath and dives down, grabbing my hand as he descends. — Marie Lu

How many times have you been called an abomination?" he whispers. "A monster? Worthless?"
Too many times. — Marie Lu

I smile bitterly. "Let's not forget who killed her. You destroy all that you touch."
"Well," he whispers back, returning my smile. "Then we have much in common. — Marie Lu

Enzo inherited a throne. Giulietta relied on her royal blood. Queen Maeve rules Beldain because she was born to it.
But true rulers are not born. We are made. — Marie Lu

And I'm not horrified. I look at it, indulging in the darkness around me, feeding me, strengthening me, and I realize that I'm happy I killed him. Truly happy. — Marie Lu