Quotes & Sayings About Accountants

Fact is, the work place to a great extent is "where we live." We need star accountants. Boffo saleswomen. Over-the-top creatives in marketing and new product development. And so on. But, since we're effectively talking about "where we live," good sense and good business and "good" engagement throughout the "supply chain," from vendor's vendor to customer's customer, we would benefit mightily-including on the P & L-if we insisted (!) on: "Pleasant." "Caring." "Engaged." — Tom Peters

I believe the biggest challenge is just getting the courage to try something different or new. Try to forget the stereotype in your mind. Yoga is for everyone - children, athletes, moms, dads, accountants, truck drivers, even country stars. — Kristian Bush

No,"Ito said gently, "we will not be needing soldiers. Accountants will do nicely."
Mutsuhito frowned. "How does one storm a castle with accountants ?"
"One buys it, sir. — Natasha Pulley

The philanthropist can never forget classes and callings. He says, with a modest swagger, 'I have invited twenty-five factory hands to tea.' If he said 'I have invited twenty-five chartered accountants to tea,' everyone would see the humour of so simple a classification. — G.K. Chesterton

As everyone from ancient times till today knows, clerks and accountants think in a non-human fashion. They think like filing cabinets. This is not their fault. If they don't think that way their drawers will all get mixed up and they won't be able to provide the services their government, company or organisation requires. — Yuval Noah Harari

Librarians often are wild in the sack, just like accountants. — Eve Jagger

Capitalism, so called, is when free people accumulate capital of their own free will for use on freely determined projects. The fact of the matter is that most of these projects flop. Donald Trump, for example. Every property he touches seems to go to hell. "Fat Cat" would be the wrong epithet for Trump. If someone other than paroled former Enron accountants were keeping his books, he'd probably be shown to have a net worth less than that of your twenty-pound tabby who just shredded the drapes. What — P. J. O'Rourke

Victor wants his children to have a better life. He encourages them to spend many years in college. Victor wants his children to become physicians, lawyers, accountants, executives, and so on. But in so encouraging them, Victor essentially discourages his children from becoming entrepreneurs. — Thomas J. Stanley

The job market of the future will consist of those jobs that robots cannot perform. Our blue-collar work is pattern recognition, making sense of what you see. Gardeners will still have jobs because every garden is different. The same goes for construction workers. The losers are white-collar workers, low-level accountants, brokers, and agents. — Michio Kaku

The guys at Smartax are the most renowned Accountants in the world! — Donald Trump

You have wondered perhaps, why all real accountants wear hats? They are today's cowboys — David Foster Wallace

Sociologists are those academic accountants who think that truth can be shaken from an abacus. — Peter S. Prescott

Well, of
course one must have concentration. Courage. Self-control. That goes
without saying. But more important than these, one must have ... I
don't know how to say it. One must be both a mathematician and a
poet. As though poetry were a science; or mathematics an art. One
must have an affection for proportion to play Go at all well.Ah ... what Go is to philosophers
and warriors, chess is to accountants and merchants. — Trevanian

I have no use for bodyguards, but I have very specific use for two highly trained certified public accountants. — Elvis Presley

Britain needs a simpler tax system which is simple to understand, where there are no loop-holes, where the very rich do not avoid tax by employing expensive accountants — George Osborne

I look like an accountant. And no offense to accountants! There's some really cool accountants out there. — Jake Lacy

We're all different. Some people are musicians, some people are actors, some people are agents and some people are accountants ... We're all different. — Anthony Hopkins

All the Congress, all the accountants and tax lawyers, all the judges, and a convention of wizards all cannot tell for sure what the income tax law says. — Walter Wriston

Successful long term relationships are all about power levels.
A high power level male will attract and succeed with a high level power female.
How do we define those power levels? We can't, they are inherently in us, and invisible to scientists, accountants, psychologists and spiritualists alike. None can explain the Universe in its entirety, and it is more than chemistry, biology, physics, genetics, horoscopes, religion, in-laws, fame, psychology and spirituality.
We may be infatuated by a person, but as soon as we hold their hands, kiss their lips, and especially, make love or have sex with them, their power levels will be instantly exposed. — Robert Black

Bakers bake bread, accountants manage accounts and entrepreneurs turn ideas into reality. — Richard Branson

Making money is one thing, paying tax is another. — Habeeb Akande

an economic operating system designed by thirteenth-century Moorish accountants looking for a way to preserve the aristocracy of Europe has worked as promised. It turned the marketplace into one giant debtors' prison. It is not only unfit for the needs of a twenty-first-century digital society; central currency is the core mechanism of the growth trap. — Douglas Rushkoff

Agents do nothing for the good of football. I'd like to see them lined up against a wall and machine-gunned ?some accountants and solicitors with them. — Graham Taylor

Accountants are in the past, managers are in the present, and leaders are in the future. — Paul Orfalea

The accursed ship didn't sink for a full three hours. By the time it did, I was feeling so traumatized that even watching Dogface die offered little consolation. The dialogue, the acting, the vast emptiness of the whole endeavour! Was that what passed for cinema these days? I felt like I have been violated; violated by a team of accountants. — Paul Murray

There was no 'Miss Woodley.' There was Willie. Willie was about life, and she grabbed it by the balls. Y'all know that. She loved a stiff drink, a stiff hundred, and she loved her business. And she didn't judge nobody. She loved everyone equal - accountants, queers, musicians, she welcomed us all, said we were all idiots just the same. — Ruta Sepetys

Most accountants are strange - let's be honest. — Hannah Gadsby

You know, the only way I've found to make these pictures is with animators. You can't seem to do it with accountants and bookkeepers. — Walt Disney

I'm strongly for a patient Bill of Rights. Decisions ought to be made by doctors, not accountants. — Chuck Schumer

It is not the job of mathematicians ... to do correct arithmetical operations. It is the job of bank accountants. — Samuil Shatunovsky

All I'm doing is I'm filling out my tax returns - or my accountants are, and I'm paying whatever I'm supposed to pay, though I'm giving away a large amount of the money and that probably lowers my tax rate because I'm giving away so much money. But change the law, but don't blame me for the law. I'm not writing the law. I didn't write the law. — David Rubenstein

I've always hated the way Hollywood has portrayed accountants. They're always little nerd balls, wimpy, afraid of everything. Growing up with accountants, I don't see them that way. — Amy Heckerling

Someone remind me why I didn't want to be an accountant when I grew up," Brock drawled.
Niko chuckled. "Because accountants don't get to make things go boom. — Lara Adrian

The Machinery are a bunch of fuckwits who believe that the human body is best conceptualised as a machine, and that if behaviour is stripped down to only what is functional, a higher form of humanity will emerge. This means actions that lead to the fulfilment of their basic needs only. Disease is a malfunction. You can see where this goes. They're boring as hell, they only speak to convey information and they are more inflexible than actual machines. They are said to be good spouses and accountants. The one beside me has a distinct self-image, fully identified as a machine. He repeats to himself mentally, 'You are a machine, you are a machine. — Tade Thompson

Accountants, they have a wild side to them. — Sloane Howell

Most accountants will tell you the majority of small businesses run as an S Corporation. — Kevin McCarthy

Did you hear about the accountant who became am embezzler? He ran away with the accounts payable! — Jackie Mason

The only people helped by the death tax are lawyers, accountants, and IRS agents. — Bob Schaffer

Actuaries are people who wanted to be accountants but didn't have the personality. — Kaz Cooke

Goldman Sachs itself - and so Goldman was in the position of selling bonds to its customers created by its own traders, so they might bet against them. Secondly, there was a crude, messy, slow, but acceptable substitute for Mike Burry's credit default swaps: the actual cash bonds. According to a former Goldman derivatives trader, Goldman would buy the triple-A tranche of some CDO, pair it off with the credit default swaps AIG sold Goldman that insured the tranche (at a cost well below the yield on the tranche), declare the entire package risk-free, and hold it off its balance sheet. Of course, the whole thing wasn't risk-free: If AIG went bust, the insurance was worthless, and Goldman could lose everything. Today Goldman Sachs is, to put it mildly, unhelpful when asked to explain exactly what it did, and this lack of transparency extends to its own shareholders. If a team of forensic accountants went over Goldman's books, they'd be shocked at just how good Goldman is at hiding things, — Michael Lewis

Most people in America understand that the rich people hire good accountants and figure out how not to necessarily pay all the taxes that they should be paying. — George W. Bush

Say you have a dog, but you need to create a duck on the financial statements. Fortunately, there are specific accounting rules for what constitutes a duck: yellow feet, white covering, orange beak. So you take the dog and paint its feet yellow and its fur white and you paste an orange plastic beak on its nose, and then you say to your accountants, 'This is a duck! Don't you agree that it's a duck?' And the accountants say, 'Yes, according to the rules, this is a duck.' Everybody knows that it's a dog, not a duck, but that doesn't matter, because you've met the rules for calling it a duck. — Bethany McLean

While the worriers are worrying, the planners are planning and the accountants are figuring out why we can't afford it, I'm busy getting started. — Walt Disney

Art with a big "A" is for museums, galleries, critics, and collectors. art with a small "a" is for the rest of us. Art is a business, an industry, a racket. art is about passion, love, life, humanity - everything that is truly valuable. Art is sold, resold, put under the gavel, and insured up the wazoo. art with a small "a" is not a product. It's a point of view. It's a way of life. Art is made by trained professionals and experts. art is made by accountants, farmers, and stay-at-home moms at restaurant tables, in parking lots, and laundry rooms. Art takes Art School and Talent and years of Suffering and Sacrifice. art just takes desire and 15 minutes a day. You may not be an Artist. Big whoop. But I know you can make art - with a wonderful, expressive, teeny, tiny a. — Danny Gregory

The studios have been taken over by marketing people and accountants. — Joe Eszterhas

Accountants, machinists, medical technicians, even software writers that write the software for 'machines' are being displaced without upscaled replacement jobs. Retrain, rehire into higher paying and value-added jobs? That may be the political myth of the modern era. There aren't enough of those jobs. — Bill Gross

In order to function, the people who operate such a system of drawers must be reprogrammed to stop thinking as humans and to start thinking as clerks and accountants. — Yuval Noah Harari

Excel suffers from an image problem. Most people assume that spreadsheet programs such as Excel are intended for accountants, analysts, financiers, scientists, mathematicians, and other geeky types. Creating a spreadsheet, sorting data, using functions, and making charts seems daunting, and best left to the nerds. — Ian Lamont

On the third, we got into troubles. Baz Jesek had gotten more and more involved with equipment and maintenance - he is a good engineer, I'll give him that - I was tactical commander, and Oser - I thought by default, but now I think design - took up the administrative slack. Could have been good, each doing what he did best, if Oser'd been working with and not against us. In the same situation, I'd have sent assassins. Oser employed guerilla accountants. — Lois McMaster Bujold

That all salespeople are different, that all accountants are different, that each individual, no matter what his chosen profession, is unique. — Marcus Buckingham

If businesses don't know from state to state what the requirements are for taxes, they have to waste a lot of money on accountants and lawyers before deciding to expand their business into the state next door. — Bob Goodlatte

Professionals knew that the most dangerous men in the world were accountants. — Sam Sykes

We're living in a time period where if a kid is on a plastic scooter that's one inch off the ground, mom and dad think he should have a helmet on. I don't think they should have a helmet on. They should break their leg and have an imagination. Otherwise, we're going to have a nation of accountants. — Ramin Bahrani

Rice professor Erik Dane finds that the more expertise and experience people gain, the more entrenched they become in a particular way of viewing the world. He points to studies showing that expert bridge players struggled more than novices to adapt when the rules were changed, and that expert accountants were worse than novices at applying a new tax law. As we gain knowledge about a domain, we become prisoners of our prototypes. — Adam M. Grant

Now record companies are run by lawyers and accountants. The shift from the one to the other was definitely related to when the takes started to get big. — David Crosby

I'll never be that trusting again, believing accountants and lawyers have my best interests at heart. — Irene Cara

JIT is a technique used to eliminate the waste of excess inventory. Parts and materials are "pulled" through the production process only as needed, rather than "pushed" out onto the production floor in large quantities. Accountants justifiably see inventory as an asset because it represents an investment by the company. From a JIT perspective, however, it is an avoidable cost that must be minimized. Any costs that do not contribute to the value of the output are to be eliminated. — John M. McKeller

Aware adults with autism and their parents are often angry about autism. They may ask why nature or God created such horrible conditions as autism, manic depression, and schizophrenia. However, if the genes that caused these conditions were eliminated there might be a terrible price to pay. It is possible that persons with bits of these traits are more creative, or possibly even geniuses. If science eliminated these genes, maybe the whole world would be taken over by accountants. — Steve Silberman

We didn't have lawyers and accountants. No one was watching out for our money. We'd go to the office and get money and go on our way. I was 19-20 years old then. I was stupid. I didn't know any better. We weren't getting our fair share of the money. That happens to young musicians all the time. It makes me mad when I think how stupid we were. — Steve Jones

There aren't more lady songwriters for the same reason that there aren't more lady doctors or lady accountants or lady lawyers; not enough women have the time for careers. — Dorothy Fields

I am being embezzled by a monstrous ring of accountants, estate planners and lawyers who are mercilessly slandering me and trying to kill my career and, I believe, murder me in order to gain control of my royalties. — Randy Quaid

Accountants and economists are natural enemies. One views trees, the other forests, and the visions are usually at odds, as they should be. — Robert Ludlum

Over the long haul of life on this planet, it is the ecologists, and not the bookkeepers of business, who are the ultimate accountants. — Stewart Udall

It's the duty of artists to volunteer to do particle counting. Don't leave creation up to the accountants. — Maxine Hong Kingston

Financial analysts make a lot more than accountants. — Warren Farrell

My company is now in it's third year of trading with CBS accountants. I have found them 100% professional and their expertise in complex tax matters is worth its weight in gold. As a result, I have recommended them to many colleagues who are also very happy with the service provided. — Christopher Wray

Derivative trading with mark-to-market accounting degenerates into mark-to-model. Two firms make a big derivative trade and the accountants on both sides show a large profit from the same trade. — Charlie Munger

A defrocked heretic accountant, Grimm had learned just enough mathemagics to be a nuisance, if not actually dangerous, and had been thrown out of the Accountants' Guild for unethical use of imaginary numbers. — Simon R. Green

My accountant regularly asks to take me to lunch. I always say I can't afford it. — Anne Robinson

The fact that people still know us is, in my opinion, a result of our music and of the big money that runs the music industry today. The people who control the industry are accountants who recycle everything in new, nostalgic packages, and everything else, to make more money. — Rick Wright

The Comedy Store - all three rooms were filled with 800 people in the room. And during that time, all these guys and some women, but mostly guys who weren't funny were doing stand up for a living; they weren't accountants, they were making $30-$50 grand a year on the road, or more. — Bob Saget

A new report says ISIS is trying to recruit professionals like doctors, engineers, and accountants. Sorry, kids, even ISIS says they're not hiring liberal arts majors. — Conan O'Brien

All the flower children were as alike as a congress of accountants and about as interesting. — John Mortimer

We teach boys to be such men as we are. We do not teach them to aspire to be all they can. We do not give them a training as if webelieved in their noble nature. We scarce educate their bodies. We do not train the eye and the hand. We exercise their understandings to the apprehension and comparison of some facts, to a skill in numbers, in words; we aim to make accountants, attorneys, engineers; but not to make able, earnest, great- hearted men. — Ralph Waldo Emerson

We're in an era where the demand is for immediate hits that are destined to become obsolescent. Six months later, everyone forgets the artist and the tune. It's become like a con job. Producers, engineers, lawyers and accountants all make money, but the artists don't. — Tony Bennett

I don't know how much money I've got. I did ask the accountant how much it came to. I wrote it down on a bit of paper. But I've lost the bit of paper. — John Lennon

For me, you've got to play football first. We're not trying to be accountants. The money takes care of itself. That's kind of how I think anyway. — Shaun Alexander

We are not utopians, we do not "dream" of dispensing at once with all administration, with all subordination. These anarchist dreams, based upon incomprehension of the tasks of the proletarian dictatorship, are totally alien to Marxism, and, as a matter of fact, serve only to postpone the socialist revolution until people are different. No, we want the socialist revolution with people as they are now, with people who cannot dispense with subordination, control, and "foremen and accountants". — Vladimir Ilyich Lenin

Unhappiness makes beggars or accountants of us all. — Barbara Grizzuti Harrison

The artist is the lowest form of life on the rung of the ladder. The publishers are usually businessmen who deal with businessmen. They deal with promotional people. They deal with financial people. They deal with accountants. They deal with people who work on higher levels. They deal with tax people, but have absolutely no interest in artists, in individual artists, especially very young artists. — Jack Kirby

From the Olympian heights of an executive suite, in an atmosphere where your success is judged by the extent to which you can maximise profits, the overwhelming tendency must be to see people as units of production, as indices in your accountants' books. — Jimmy Reid

I'm not a detail guy. I depend on accountants and administrators to do my detail stuff for me, but I do know the overall picture and I know that if you put business people together in a room, not just politicians, they could shrink the deficit tremendously by good business tactics. — John Paul DeJoria

I think functioning as a business manager can be a hindrance to having a real dialogue with the artist. I do think that artists need good lawyers and accountants, because they're dealing with serious money. But an artist who stands behind a manager? That's a little different. I think that can be a bad buffer. — Larry Gagosian

Unfortunately, music devolved instead of evolved. The music business got into the hands of lawyers and accountants rather than the entrepreneurial creative people, and that's when the beginning of the end started. It's all based on money instead of art and creativity. — Gary Wright

I never get the accountants in before I start up a business. It's done on gut feeling, especially if I can see that they are taking the mickey out of the consumer. — Richard Branson

You know that big government doesn't hurt big corporations. They've got the best lawyers and accountants in the world. You know who gets destroyed by big government? It's the little guys. — Marco Rubio

Today, planning has become collaborative and interactive, using software and tools that will allow clients to "play" with different scenarios, becoming invested in the results. Our delivery is online, and the focus is on the process of planning, not the product (the plan). We engage as many other professionals as we need to (accountants, attorneys, and insurance agents) to complete the implementation. — Deena B. Katz

A lot of labels are hiring a lot more accountants than people that know music. — Taylor Hanson

I will never begin to know what the accountants do or what the camera guys do, as much as I try to learn just out of respect for what they do and to try to make my job as manager more efficient. The most important thing is to let those people do their jobs while making it clear what the parameters are. — Robert Carlock

I just kind of dive in if I think I can create something that will make a difference and then try to get the numbers to stack up after the event. So most of the things I've done I would not have done if I'd have asked the accountants to look at them before. — Richard Branson

If you are hired to shake up the system, do it. No one will believe you're the boss until you do one or more of the following: 1. Add a new division; 2. Lop off a present department; 3. Add new people or reassign and reward present employees; 4. Get rid of deadwood; 5. Change the method of accounting; 6. Change lawyers, accountants, or other outside services; 7. Ask a lot of questions, and demand answers by a certain date; 8. Get in touch with key people in your industry or city and arrange personal meetings; 9. Improve working conditions; 10. Update present benefit plans. — Lois Wyse

There are people who want to know about everything in the minutest detail, like accountants or lawyers. But show a toe sticking out of a hole in a sock to a poet and it is enough to produce an image of the whole world in him. — Tarkovsky

Her lips are slightly parted: she, whose lips are usually pressed together with the daily disapprovals of the accountants' office where she has worked continually, except for the months of illness, since she was 18, that is to say, for 16 years and some months. Her lips, when she does not speak or eat, are normally pressed together like the ruled line of a balance sheet, marked straight with her old-fashioned lipstick, a final and judjing mouth, a precision instrument. — Muriel Spark

Americans like to make money; Canadians like to audit it. I know no other country where accountants have a higher social and moral status. — Northrop Frye

Book publishing was never a heaven "run by editors", and it is by no means today a hell "run by accountants." If our "sole interest" was "instant profit," not only would we never do any number of the things we actually do every day, we probably wouldn't be in book publishing at all. — Patrick Nielsen Hayden

I guess it's like trying to put through the flat tax, which is probably my favorite one of all ... if we did pass it, all of a sudden, what do you have? You have the whole tax system run by a little old lady on a home computer, doing the work of all these thousands of bureaucrats and accountants. Passing that would be amazing, wouldn't it? — Clint Eastwood

Films are now made by accountants. They pick a pretty young female or male face out of the air and give them a part - not because they think that person is right for it or is ready for it, but because they think that person will make them money. — Christopher Lee

I've got an accountant who's been with me forty years. If he makes a mistake, he dies. — Don Rickles

But we didn't have the financial structure, like the right attorneys, the right managers, the right accountants, and we were going against the grain of what black entertainers is supposed to do. — Solomon Burke

My secret vice is Sudoku puzzles. Can't stop playing them. My parents are accountants. I blame them entirely. — Lisa Gardner