Aaaaahhhh Funny Quotes & Sayings

A little allegory of the soul - wherever it hides, God will find it. — Eileen Atkins

I do kind of aspire to do comedy that appeals to a wide range of audiences and doesn't divide people. I never want to do material that makes people laugh at the expense of making other people feel bad - not to say I'm not guilty of that at times ... I try and make humor out of the really important issues of the day, like Hot Pockets and elevators and not wanting to get out of bed. — Jim Gaffigan

Maybe I couldn't be dafter, But I keep wondering if this time we settle our differences before a war instead of after. — Ogden Nash

Don't be discouraged by a failure. It can be a positive experience. Failure is, in a sense, the highway to success, inasmuch as every discovery of what is false leads us to seek earnestly after what is true, and every fresh experience points out some form of error which we shall afterwards carefully avoid. — John Keats

The rumors of Frank Sinatra's violence and his ties to organized crime were such that journalists joked in print about me ending up in concrete boots and sleeping with the fishes if I proceeded to write his biography. — Kitty Kelley

If you make a mistake, you should enjoy it. — Adam Ant

You need to dream a bigger dream for yourself. That is the lesson. Hold the highest vision possible for your life and it can come true. — Oprah Winfrey

Both of my hands were on his chest. They had a mind of their own. I claimed no responsibility for them.
Daemon kissed like he was a man starving for water, taking long, breathless drafts. When his hands slid ... under my shirt, it was as though he reached deep inside me, warming every cell, filling evry dark space within me. Touching him, kissing him, was like having a fever all over again. I was on fire. My body burned. The world burned. Sparks flew. Against his mouth, I moaned. — Jennifer L. Armentrout

When I was a little baby, my mama she said Son.Travel where you will and grow to be a manAnd sing what must be sung, poor boySing what must be sung. — Hoyt Axton

The reason for this persistent story line in the Bible is not simply because the writers like underdogs. It is because the ultimate example of God's working in the world was Jesus Christ, the only founder of a major religion who died in disgrace, not surrounded by all of his loving disciples but abandoned by everybody whom he cared about, including his Father. — Timothy J. Keller

We had a happy marriage because we were together all the time. We were friends as well as husband and wife. We just had a good time. — Julia Child

Maybe that's the thing with liberation. It comes with a price. Forty years wandering through the desert. Or incurring the wrath of two very pissed-off parents. — Gayle Forman

I plugged my phone in where the blender used to be. I called someone. They went "Aaaaahhhh ... " — Steven Wright

Whatever happens at all happens as it should; you will find this true, if you watch narrowly. — Marcus Aurelius

I hear a lot of young people talking about the need to network. I think that is true, and I think that building a network makes sense. But I also think that there is another way to approach it, and that is to try to make friends. Just try to make a lot of friends. — Dana Perino

Peace rules the day, where reason rules the mind. — Wilkie Collins