142 Funny Quotes & Sayings
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Top 142 Funny Quotes

When I got off the plane, after eleven hours of travel and forty years away, the man took my passport and asked me the purpose of my visit, I wrote in my daybook, "To mourn," and then, "To mourn try to live," he gave me a look and asked if I would consider that business or pleasure, I wrote, "Neither." "For how long do you plan to mourn and try to live?" "For as long as I can." "Are we talking about a weekend or a year?" I didn't write anything. The man said, "Next. — Jonathan Safran Foer

FARC, the Colombian rebels who've been funding their revolution against the state with kidnapping, extortion, and drug dealing. — Janet Evanovich

Even the best Christian that ever lived is not acting on his own steam
he is only nourishing or protecting a life he could never have acquired by his own efforts. — C.S. Lewis

Her only gift was knowing people almost by instinct, she thought, walking on. If you put her in a room with someone, up went her back like a cat's; or she purred. — Virginia Woolf

Harder to get in than out, like so little else. — Sarah Dessen