M.C. Humphreys Quotes & Sayings

The nose can't help catchin' what the ears get sick with. Yessir, rock bands just sweat evil. Evil's been around for a long time, ever since rocks started getting real hot and making a lot of noise as they exploded out o' the ground and evil spirits wisped out of hell. If a band ever uses a fog machine, hold your breath so you don't become possessed by one. — M.C. Humphreys

I don't want the finer things in life, like preserves of jam and thick soft quilts, until I get what I need: the machinery to make that stuff for me. — M.C. Humphreys

Quotes ain't all that useful. Fact is, there's more concise ways to express what you're feelin', like screams and moans. — M.C. Humphreys

No one knows who they are more than someone who changes their identity (before I became a farmer, I was a leadership coach). — M.C. Humphreys

With tractors, you just don't get the feel of tilling that land. So when planting season comes around, I use a hoe. To grow one useful whore, that's the motto of my pimp farm. — M.C. Humphreys

The thing about the black market is, it's racist. White children make useful slaves, too. — M.C. Humphreys