Craig Benzine Quotes & Sayings

The grass is always greener when it's covered in money. — Craig Benzine

Visiting Saturn sounds like a lot of fun but you will die! — Craig Benzine

This quote will self-destruct in ... 4 ... 3 ... 2 ... 1 ... Just kidding ... Or am I? — Craig Benzine

It's better to have won & lost than to have won, stopped trying, & descended into alcoholism. — Craig Benzine

Saving time is so important that I'm not even going to finish this sen-it's lunchtime already? Yum yum. — Craig Benzine

Time travel is awesome ... And useful. That sentence had a typo when I typed it ... The first time. — Craig Benzine

At one time or another, farts have coincided with every other sound, including this quote. — Craig Benzine

The good thing about living like me is everywhere you go is a step up. — Craig Benzine

Dont get scared of death. Get rich! Then die. — Craig Benzine

Based on this one experience I had, jumping to conclusions is always really stupid. — Craig Benzine

Be cautious of bears at all times, even when being mauled by a tiger. — Craig Benzine

I'd choose truth over cake but I'd try to find a way to get both to be honest. — Craig Benzine

Failure is not an option. It just happens all the time. Like, all the time. — Craig Benzine

Never put a foot down in the middle of a foot rub. — Craig Benzine

Things that don't exist do exist, they're just really fast. — Craig Benzine

Nothing is perfect. Therefore, being perfect is being nothing ... and that's a great way to lose weight. — Craig Benzine

The coffee's done? I LOVE IT WHEN THE COFFEE'S DONE! — Craig Benzine

Cars and bumper cars are two very different things. NEVER sleep in a bumper car. — Craig Benzine

Theres nothing to fear but
fears themselves, such as monsters,
rejection, food poisoning, redundancy,
monsters, and oxford commas. — Craig Benzine

Are imperfections is which make we grate. — Craig Benzine

People alive are better than people not alive. — Craig Benzine

I would hate to be a bee. Be surrounded by bees all the time. — Craig Benzine

If you're gonna lob something, lob love. — Craig Benzine

Blanket statements are always stupid. NO EXCEPTIONS! — Craig Benzine

Options are good. Keeps people choosing. — Craig Benzine

The only good excuse for not succeeding is DEATH! Unless you're trying to be a ghost. Then it's LIFE! — Craig Benzine

Bird Poop in the mouth is always a surprise. — Craig Benzine

It's better to have a broken CD player that worked once than to never have evolved into a self-aware carbon based lifeform. — Craig Benzine

I love it when the coffee's done! — Craig Benzine

Sure relationships can be fun at first, but then you get to know each others quirks, and those quirks become quarks, and those quarks combine and become hadrons and scientists love to combine hadrons in giant hadron colliders and they create black holes! — Craig Benzine

Everything is optional.
Somethings are illegal.
And some things are really gross. — Craig Benzine

Don't put clothes on food. It's supposed to be naked. — Craig Benzine

Nature is a porno. Deal with it. — Craig Benzine